Paige Matthews quotes from Charmed

Phoebe

Well my boyfriend moved to Hong Kong, I'm thoroughly depressed, but I still managed to sign up six people. and you have?

Paige

I have none people.

Phoebe

Hmm. None people.

Paige

Did you get anything?

Phoebe

Yeah, frost bite.

Piper

You expect us to beat the Titans dressed like this?! Maybe at a costume party!

Chris

That's not a costume. That represents your new position and power.

Paige

Power? Power's good. I like power. Why do I like power?

Chris

Because you are the Goddess of War.

Paige

Ahh. Well, I guess that explains the pitch fork.

Chris

It's not a pitch fork, it's a trident. Be careful, that's a formidable weapon.

Paige

Right on. Who wants to fight?

Phoebe

I'm a lover, not a fighter.

Chris

You're the Goddess of Love.

Piper

Naturally. Well, then that must make me the Goddess of Sanity because I find this ridiculous!

Paige

Reason and judgement are the qualities of a leader. Tacitus 100 AD.

Phoebe

Love will keep us together. Captain and Tennille. 1970s.

Who are you?

Paige

The Supremes.

Phoebe

Or how about "I'm going to go check with the Elders". Do you really think he checks with the Elders?

Paige

No. He probably orbs to a sports bar and buys his buddies a round of drinks. "Yeah, my wife thinks I'm up there. Here's to the Elders".

Paige

What kind of whitelighter can't heal?

Chris

For the record, you can't heal either.

Paige

I'm half whitelighter. How come you didn't tell us about this before we hired you?

Chris

Because you didn't hire me. I was assigned by the elders.

Phoebe

Any other little surprises you'd like to share with us?

Chris

No. Look, I haven't been a whitelighter very long, okay? And healing, it's big. And takes a while to learn how to do.

Phoebe

Great, student-lighter.

Paige

Well that little magical whammy you performed on her kind of, um, backfired.

Phoebe

You see, after you left, Piper was really...

Paige

Chipper. Yeah, incessantly, increasingly, annoyingly chipper.

Phoebe

What she said.

Leo

Well, it was supposed to make her feel less pain. I guess with me not around to pull it back a little bit, she got happier and happier?

Paige

Um, no, psychotically chipper.

Paige

What is going on here?

Badass fight, that's what.

Paige

Who said that?

Oh, wait, you mean you can hear me? Well, hallelujah. It's about time.

Paige

Please don't tell me you're talking to me.

Are you kidding? I've been trying to get your attention for two days now. I'm in serious trouble here.

Paige

Okay. It's okay, Paige. You've dealt with weirder stuff than this. Maybe-maybe my powers are just advancing. Maybe I can understand animals now.

Oh, please, give me a break. Until you accepted that there might be a reason you got this job, you weren't going to be open to helping me.

Phoebe

Okay, but you don't have to yell at me. 'Cause I can sense how mad you are.

Paige

Okay, just 'cause you can sense doesn't mean I can't vent.

Phoebe

Reverse the spell. Reverse the spell.

Paige

All right, uh.

Phoebe

I mean, just because I could feel some glimmer of Piper's feelings doesn't mean she can. She's completely cut off from them.

Chris

Wait, wait, wait, hold it. Isn't there a spell that allows somebody to feel what you feel? Which in this case would be Piper feeling what you're feeling Piper should be feeling... Did that make any sense?

Paige

Um, frightening, it did.

Paige

Well, then the question is how do we get close enough to her without her kicking our butts?

Phoebe

I could use my new power to counteract hers.

Chris

How do you figure?

Phoebe

Well, our powers are emotion-based, right? If I can channel Piper's feelings, why can't I channel her powers? And then use them against her.

Piper

(to Wyatt) Okay, bud, here we go. Here we go, okay. Hey, lookie, how about this? (picks up a teddy) You like this guy? Hello. No? Pheebs, a little help here.

Phoebe

We hate that toy. It's yucky and crusty and gross.

Piper

Okay, then what does he want?

Phoebe

That. (points at the TV)

Piper

Yeah, see, I am a failure.

Paige

No, you're not. We just happen to have more pressing concerns right now than the media's influence.

I don't know what's happening here, I...

Paige

Well, it's called magic, Kaneisha. Witchcraft, specifically. I really love your... jacket! (orbs the jacket to her)

Phoebe

Wanna see more magic? Let's check in with Piper at the Golden Gate Bridge. Take it away, Piper!