Phoebe Halliwell quotes from Charmed

Cole

I'm getting more human by the day. What would you say if I became really human, and got a job?

Phoebe

If thats the criteria for being really human then I am in big trouble.

Phoebe

It's just, becoming a wife. I mean, I like Samantha but I never actually wanted to become her. See, Samantha, she was married to a human, Darrin. Darrin completely suppressed Samantha's magic, completely denied who she was. And it wasn't because he didn't love her, it was just that's the way it had to be.

Cole

And this was one of your favourite shows?

Phoebe

She went from being Samantha to Mrs. Darrin Stephens overnight.

Cole

Well, that won't happen to you.

Phoebe

Won't it?

Cole

No. You'll become Mrs. Cole Turner.

Cole

Miss Phoebe Halliwell, I come to you, a man, nothing more, nothing less, to ask, will you be my wife?

Phoebe

Hmm.. Yeah, I will, again.

Paige

Urgh, the sun came up again.

Phoebe

Good morning sunshine, let me pour you a cup of coffee. Notice anything different about me?

Piper

Engagement ring. Notice it or wear coffee.

Phoebe

And Paige, thank you so much for getting him this job. I mean especially now that we're going to be married and he's gonna have to get used to bringing home the bacon.

Paige

Since when does Phoebe care about bacon?

Leo

I'm sure she meant all breakfast meats.

Piper

You know what? Don't make our issues his issues. I think you need to give him a chance to learn how to control it. Maybe that's why we met him. To teach him, guide him.

Phoebe

Feed him.

Paige

Wow, Phoebe, you went all out.

Phoebe

Oh, well, you know me. Any excuse to spend a little extra time in the kitchen.

Piper

I do know you and that's just not true.

Phoebe

Oh, but it is now that I'm going to be Sadie, Sadie, married lady.

Piper

Alright, Sadie, how about I take the cookies to the kid.

Leo

Phoebe, are you feeling alright?

Phoebe

Peachy keen.

Phoebe

Oh honey, what will you do?

Cole

Well, I dunno, I'm still searching for who I am. But we know who you are, which is a demon-fighting, ass-kicking witch who never lets her sisters down. So get out of that bathtub and show me what you're made of!

Phoebe

Better?

Paige

Hey, Cole, how's your progress going on... Oh God, full frontal Phoebe! Sorry.

Cole

She just flashed.

Paige

Yeah, I got that!

Cole

No, no, I mean she just flashed black and white.

Piper

Stand back.

Phoebe

What was that?

Paige

I think you just saw a mother lift a car off her child.

Phoebe

What the hell was that?

Paige

A Haiku, I couldn't do the rhyming thing.

Piper

A demon? What kind of demon?

Phoebe

One with a half a face.

Piper

Yuck!!

Phoebe

Oh honey, are you still on that Last Will and Testament kick? I gotta tell you, it's very very morbid.

Piper

No, it's very very responsible. Prue did it, and thank God she did 'cause if she didn't we'd still be dealing with lawyers. No offense.

Cole

Oh, none taken. I've come to terms with my evil past.

Phoebe

For Prue.

Piper

For Prue.

Leo

What do you say we go home and get started on our future?

Piper

What do you say we go home and sleep, and we work on that future tomorrow night.