Phoebe Halliwell quotes from Charmed

Piper

Maybe you're right, maybe you do need the book. What good is being a witch if you can't use a little magic when you're hurting.

Phoebe

I cannot believe that you're suggesting that. What about personal gain?

Piper

Well, just word the spell properly, avoid it. You should know how to do it by now. Just be pure, ask your heart for the answer. Just don't tell Paige, I just don't want her thinking she can do it too.

Phoebe

I can explain, you are dreaming.

Piper

Dreaming?

Phoebe

Yes, dreaming. And you are going to wake up in your room and everything is going to be fine.

Little Phoebe

I'm ten, I'm not stupid. Grams!

Piper

Wow, I do not miss that.

Cole

Who are you?

Old Phoebe

Maybe this will refresh your memory. You bastard. (slaps Cole across the face.)

Phoebe

I cast a spell to hear my heart's desire. And I guess my past self and my future self showed up to help me listen.

Cole

What desire did you want to hear?

Phoebe

That's between me and...me.

Old Phoebe

Worried?

Old Phoebe

Ah, the good old days. Of course, nobody's gonna take you seriously until you stop dressing like a tramp.

Phoebe

A tramp? That is so 'in' right now.

Little Phoebe

Row, row, row your boat, gently down the stream...

Piper

Honey, you have to listen to me.

Little Phoebe

Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, life is but a dream.

Piper

We're just trying to help.

Leo

She's your sister.

Piper

Yeah, don't remind me.

Phoebe

Having a little trouble with young Phoebe?

Piper

Yeah, enough to make me reconsider having children. Maybe we should just lie to her again.

Phoebe

No. I think I have an idea.

Little Phoebe

Stay away from me or I'll sick Prue on you.

Piper

Oh, yeah, don't go there.

Little Phoebe

Oh, my gosh! Who are you?

Phoebe

That guy is Cole. He's our fiancee.

Little Phoebe

Wait, you mean he's our prince? The one who sweeps us off our feet?

Piper

: Haha, Prince?

Phoebe

And for my two beautiful bridesmaids, whom I chose because they're my best friends in the whole wide world. There's a bonsai tree for balance and harmony, and a dreamcatcher so all your dreams will come true, just like mine have.

Paige

This is so great, tarot cards! My deck is totally trashed, this is perfect.

Phoebe

That's just incase you need psychic services while me and my new husband are busy getting busy.

Piper

Phoebe, let's not blow this out of proportion

Phoebe

My wedding dress could double as a circus tent, I think things are already out of proportion.

Phoebe

Don't think I don't know how you really feel about Cole.

Paige

Ugh, I have been nothing but nice to that demon.

Phoebe

Ex-demon.

Paige

Oh, is that like ex-convict?

Phoebe

To marriage.

Piper

Hey, this is supposed to be our anniversary.

Phoebe

To Piper and Leo's marriage, may ours be as successful as theirs.

Piper

Yeh, see that still didn't sound like it was about us.

Phoebe

Speaking of looking forward... Piper, you're going on your honeymoon tonight. I think new lingerie is in order.

Piper

You always think new lingerie is in order.

Phoebe

Not for me, silly. You wanna come, Paige?

Paige

Ugh, I can't. I have to go to that evil place where they keep my paycheque.

Phoebe

Oh, right, sorry.

Phoebe

How do you spell 'oblique'?

Piper

With spellcheck.