I had a wee spat with a werewolf myself once. Fought for over an hour. Brutal. Vicious. I almost lost my--
Angel killed him with a pen.
S5Unleashed
[about Nina's abduction] The scariest thing was how organized they were. Almost military.
An underground monster-hunting military organization. It's happened before.
Whoa! Watch it there! Just passing by and got splashed with a heap of grouchy. Got to tell you, Angelkins, that extra weight is not looking so good on you. [Angel looks down at his belly] I'm talking about psychic pounds, pumpkin. Why don't you consider me the Jenny Craig for the soul, huh? So let's hear it.
I'm not gonna sing.
Couldn't bear it if you did. No, it's talking you need... or maybe a shoulder to--
I'm not gonna cry either.
I was going to a leaning place. OK, Atlas, how about a shrug? Look, so you got the weight of the world. Burden, sure, but breaking news it ain't.
Listen, Lorne, this isn't a good time.
No. No, it never is. Spike showing up your first day in the Wolfram & Hart saddle, took the jolly right out of the rancher. But we've been feeling it ever since then, Angelcakes.
OK, so it's no secret. I don't like the guy.
So...werewolf girl. Think you got a shot?
She gave me a look.
Really? A look?
S5Hell Bound
You're right. I do deserve to go to Hell. But not today. [he punches Pavayne]
PPavayne
You dare!
Quite a bit, mate. Reality bends to desire. That was it, right? That's why I could touch Fred, write your name in the glass. All I had to do was want it bad enough. [his clothes rematerialize] And guess what I want to do now, you prissy son of a bitch!
I just want you to be careful, Fred, because I know how charming Spike can be.
He is quite the dish, with those eyes...
And the hair and the cheeks and--what do you think I am, stupid? I know he's been playing me with the looks and the smiles. I'm not some idiot schoolgirl with a crush.
Then what is it?
It's about doing what's right. Remember?
You're starting to feel it, aren't you? How close you are now... to hell?
What if I am? Not like it's such a big, bleeding deal, is it? If a ponce like you could break out--
I never escaped from hell. All I got was a short reprieve. Not even sure how I managed that.
Oh, put your martyr away, Mahatma. Fred told me all about your great, shining prophecy. Pile up all your good deeds and get the big brass ring handed to you like everything else.
Except for one small catch. The prophecy's a bunch of bull. They all are. Nothing's written in stone or fated to happen, Spike. You save the world, you end up running an evil law firm.
Or playin' Casper with one foot in the fryer.
You think any of it matters? The things we did? The lives we destroyed. That's all that's ever gonna count. So, yeah, surprise. You're going to hell. We both are.
Then why even bother? Try to do the right thing, make a difference...
What else are we gonna do?
So that's it, then. I really am going to burn.
Welcome to the club.
Least I got company, eh? You and me, together again. Hope and Crosby. Stills and Nash. Chico and the --
Yeah, are we done?
Never much for small talk, were you? Always too busy trying to perfect that brooding block-of-wood mystique. God, I love that.
Not as much as I loved your nonstop yammering.
The way you always had to be the big swingy, swaggerin' around, barkin' orders...
Never listening...
Always interrupting...
And your hair. What color do they call that, radioactive?
Never much cared for you, Liam, even when we were evil.
Cared for you less.
Fine.
Good. [they sit in silence] There was one thing about you...
Really?
Yeah, I never told anyone about this, but I--I liked your poems.
[dismissively] You like Barry Manilow.
[researching from a book] Got it. The dark soul.
What's it say?
A lot. There are over 3,200 different references. Four of them are about you.
What? Give me that.
WWes
This is getting us nowhere.
Let me see this. [reading] Well, that's not fair. I didn't even have a soul when I did that.
No. I'm not gonna end up like Pavayne--cheating Hell any way he could, no matter who it hurt.
Just proves what I've been telling everybody.
That I'm a handsome devil who brightens the place up?
That you're worth saving.
S5Life of the Party
KKnox
And how do you know your spell-casters didn't screw up the payload?
Because I went over the work and I got that knowing feeling you get when you know something.
Look, Lorne...I have things. I'm busy. [Lorne stares] I'm brooding.
[Turns around to see television is on.] Oh, you're watching hockey!
Yeah, but my team is losing.
[slurring, as a demon bumps into her.] Hey, you want a piece of me, buddy? That's right, keep walking. You walk alone! You walk alone!
Careful, that thing's loaded.
So am I. I mean, wow. Wes. Wesley, [puts her arms around Wesley's neck] I am totally drunk-faced!
Because you can't hold your.. What are you drinking?
Nothing.
You can't hold that.
Oh, yeah? Lightweight? How much have you had?
[holds up a beer bottle] Including this, I've had... about 1/3 of a half of this beer.
That's weird, right?
Yes, I think so. I think that's weird.
There's Gunn. Let's go ask him if that's weird.
[Fred and Wesley walk up to Gunn, who's facing away from them.]
Hey. Hey, Gunn. Is something weird going on? [Gunn turns toward Wesley without moving his hands, which are together just below his waist] Charles, you just peed on my shoes.
[looks down, confused] I'll be damned. [zips his zipper] That's weird.
Everything he's told us to do, we're doing. Spike's thinking positive. Gunn is peeing all over the office.
[slurring] And we're a little bit drunk.
Yes! But not because we drank. Because Lorne told us to be drunk!
[to Gunn] Lorne told you to pee all over the office?
Lord, I hope so.
You pissed in the big man's chair? That's fantastic!
Spike, can you please turn off that warm fuzzy?
What? The Lorne thing? Wore off. I just think that's bloody fabulous.
[referring to Angel and Eve] oh you two. The sexual tension. with a knife I could cut it, get a room.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Angel pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.