[Bubblegum forces open the cabin door, the cabin breaks with a flock of bats flying out of the fridge]
Ho, no, no, no, no! It's okay, everyone. It's okay. Close your eyes and repeat your safety mantra. Hoodie hoodie hoodup, hoodie hoodie hoodup, hoodie—
PBPeppermint Bulter
Princess?
Huh? Oh... Sorry, Peps. I'm just so used to having my citizens around to protect. This is gonna take some getting used to.
PBPeppermint Bulter
Permission to speak freely, ma'am?
PBPeppermint Bulter
This horrible dump does not meet the level of fancy to which I have become accustomed!
Noted. Also, FYI, my Uncle Gumbald built this cabin with his bare hands. I spent my summers here when I was younger. Anyway, it'll probably take a really long time for the Candy People to realize a bad ruler is worse than a good ruler. Plenty of time to spruce this place up.
[sees in Candy Kingdom in choas] Toronto, I've been princess for four hours, and society has already totally collapsed! Plus, now the sky is falling, I guess? Is this possibly... somehow my fault? [Toronto spits his apple]
No way! Okay, look. Without your calming presence and selfless leadership, this situation would have been a hundred times worse. History will remember you as Ooo's greatest hero.
As always, the voice of reason. Once again, my saintly nature has compelled me, unthinking, to assume the burdens of others. But a true justice demands a true accounting. And truly this is all Bubblegum's fa-aa-aa-ault! [he falls down as the ground rumbles] Oof! Good Glob! What no-o-o-o-o-w?
Man, are you still Gunther? 'Cause you seem like you're not.
Well, what the heck are you doing, Orgalorg?
OOrgalorg
It was just time to come out again. Glob KO'ing himself, the arrival of the Catalyst Comet, and a ship to carry me out of this planet's gravity. [projects three colored door shapes out of his eyes into a singular door shape] These are doorways the universe presented to me.
Oh, I know about open-door philosophy!
What's that? You just say yes to stuff all the time?
OOrgalorg
It's all yours if you're willing to take it. Destroy worlds, [folds into himself] crush anyone blocking the door, [unfolds out] feel their bones crumple and their goo spill out.
I don't like that at all.
OOrgalorg
You can't stop me, I'm Orgalorg.
I'm pretty sure I can take you, bro.
OOrgalorg
Not after I absorb the power and knowledge of that comet.
Absorb a triple salchow to your kneecaps!
PCPurple Comet
"Finn... do you remember?" [Finn groans and his "vault" in his head starts to open]
Yeah... I-I think so. A long time ago, I was you, sort of... and I crashed on Earth, and became a butterfly or some biz. And I guess it was just some random absurd thing—just a joke I've been playing out for centuries.
PCPurple Comet
"Who's creating the joke? Are you? And if so, then are you my creator?"
Uh, maybe? I dunno... Probably not.
PCPurple Comet
"Probably not, but who knows? I've been around forever and experienced so much impossible junk. I've embodied all that is good and evil. And now we're here. It's unprecedented. And I give you a choice. Come with me to the end and the beginning, [bell ringing is heard] or struggle here a while like a beautiful autumn leaf."
What's that bell sound? [a visible color spectrum seams on his head]
PCPurple Comet
"This is your crisis — as you stand on the edge of freedom from... love, hate, friendship, isolation, jealousy, secrets, violence, video games, ice cream waffles, sadness, madness, power, honor, loyalty, saucy, mothers, fathers, scoundrels."
How long are you gonna list stuff?
PCPurple Comet
"It's a long list."
You're telling to abandon all this stuff, but you're not really making it sound bad.
PCPurple Comet
"It's not bad. I'm just giving you the choice of a new mode of existence."
[beat] I feel like I put a lot of work into this meat reality. I like to see it through.
PCPurple Comet
"Fair enough."
MMartin
Hey! How about I get a new mode? [Finn's visible spectrum fades out]
Are you seriously trying to bail out again?!
MMartin
What? This deal sounds pretty good!
MMartin
Uh-oh... I know that look.
When you fled the scene like a ding-dong ditcher in the night...
MMartin
Listen, Finn — no answer I give you will be satisfying. Besides, it was like... 40 years ago.
MMartin
I don't have a star to revolve around and track time.
But why do you always run from everything?!
MMartin
You burn enough bridges, the only direction to move is forward.
[beat] Hm. Well, there ain't no changing you, I guess.
MMartin
Well, I'm glad we finally understand each other. Start the engine, comet boy!
PCPurple Comet
"Prepare to discorporate." [both Martin and the comet dissipate]
Bye, Dad. [beat] ..Should've asked for a lift home.
