Billie quotes from Accidentally on Purpose

Billie

You know who Molly Ringwald is?

Billie

Here is something addressed to you from Genesee high school. You guys were the Bombers, huh? I like those cute little smiley bomb mascots you have.

Billie

A little less cute now.

Billie

[to Zack] Why didn't you just tell me about Melissa?

Billie

Well, it was a good thing that she was, or I never would've found out about your secret Facebook relationship.

Billie

Shut it down, Liz!

Billie

Well, I think the most important thing that we take away from all of this is that forgiveness is divine. And Melissa is a skanky ho.

Billie

She is our savior. You and I've been doing things all wrong. All wrong. Like that changing table.

Billie

Nicole said its a death trap.

Billie

She also said you'd make a sarcastic remark.

Billie

I do not have the sports package. What is he talking about?

Billie

Okay, couple of things. One, is that my teddy? Two, so that's what my teddy is supposed to look like. And three, you are so fired, we need a new word for fired, but since fired is what you are, lets just go with fired.

Billie

Are you crazy?

Billie

No. I am going to keep this baby inside of me where he is safe from my poor decision making. I've been working on my Kegels. I'll just seal that sucker up. This big already, I can go bigger. I'll keep him in there till he is 9. If I can go 9, I can go 18. And once he is 18, I'll plop him out and he can make his own decisions. It's so simple, I don't know why no one's ever thought of it.

Billie

I can't believe it. Next time I go to a movie premiere, I am going to be a mother. Take a left on Geary. Aw, next time I take a left on Geary, I am going to be a mother.