Cate quotes from 8 Simple Rules

Cate

Hey, Bridg. I thought I heard something up here. What are you doing?

Bridget

Reading The Diary of Anne Frank. Mom, I don't think I can do this.

Cate

Well, honey, when you get to a word you don't know, just sound it out.

Bridget

I mean, how could I have taken on the role of Anne Frank? She's just so incredibly wise and brave. I mean, I came up here to see what it was like to be her. I just can't do her justice. I can't.

Cate

Of course you can.

Bridget

I know you never see this side of me, but it's true. Sometimes I can be a little bit superficial. I'm just not Anne material. Think I should quit? Because it's not like I'd be letting anybody down. There are tons of girls that could do a way better job than I can. I should quit, right?

Cate

Well...do you want to quit?

Bridget

No. I don't wanna quit. But I don't wanna embarrass myself. I don't wanna embarrass you either.

Cate

Oh, that's just crazy, honey. But do you want to quit?

Bridget

I don't know what else to do. I'm out of my depth.

Cate

Wow, you really did read the book. Well...I don't think you should quit. I think you can do it. I know you can do it.

Bridget

It just doesn't seem right that I play Anne. We're nothing alike. I mean, we have a nice attic, and a nice house...I can go to sleep at night when it's dark, in a warm bed...I can leave whenever I want...I don't know, my life is easy. I just have not experienced that kind of hardship.

Cate

Well, I can't imagine anyone playing the part has that kind of experience, but an actor finds things to draw on. You know, you have had your share of sadness. Start there.

Cate

Dad, don't go looking for trouble!

Jim

I don't. Trouble finds me.

C.J.

I told him to practice. But I meant on his hand or in the mirror or on plush toys.

Cate

You kiss plush toys?

C.J.

No, you kiss plush toys.

Cate

And C.J., be honest for once.

C.J.

I was ashamed. You know he was the only guy who said I'd be somebody and I never was. I almost called him one time when I was running the Tilt-A-Whirl but all the parents freaked out because I was dialing instead of "paying attention" to their kids.

Cate

Bridget, are those new pants?

Bridget

Yes, aren't they cute?

Cate

Yeah. How did you pay for them?

Bridget

Umm, with your credit card. Don't you remember? You said Lulu's is having a sale on towels can you go buy some for the guest bathroom use your own judgement. So on the way to the towels I saw these leather pants that were on sale and I remembered C.J. saying you're so wannabe without the leathers and my judgement said you don't want to be a wannabe and I thought judgement you are so right!

C.J.

That made no sense, but at least you had the presence of mind to drag me into it.

Cate

Dad, what did we say about hitting C.J. with your cane?

Jim

Not to do it. It's cause of him I'm using the damn cane, tripping over his damn extension cord, bruising my hip. Now I can't stand up. I can't walk.

Cate

Dad, let's be positive. There must be something you can do.

Jim

I can plot my revenge.

Cate

You want me to go easy. I would just like to know what's going on inside my good child.

C.J.

The thief, the druggie, or the biker chick?

Jim

Kerry's so angry. I've never seen such raw, naked hostility since... you know.

Cate

The Korean War?

Jim

No, your mother.

Kerry

Give me one good reason why I can't go to the Maeve Festival.

Cate

Actually, I'll give you three: sex, drugs and rock 'n' roll.

C.J.

Sold!

Bridget

Mom, please don't ground me.

Cate

I won't.

Bridget

Oh wow it really works. Mom, can I have twenty dollars.

Cate

No.

Cate

You're not grounded. You're going to help me with the gardening and cleaning the rain gutters.

Bridget

But what about my nails?

Cate

I guess you'll have to cut them back.

Bridget

[to CJ] This is all your fault.

Bridget

I figured out what CJ stands for... Benedict Arnold.

C.J.

That would hurt if it made any sense.

C.J.

[Bad French Accent] Hello, Cate.

Cate

[Noticing C. J. sitting there, drinking a cup of tea] How long have you been sitting there?

C.J.

[Accent] Bridget, Kerry, Kerry, Bridget. What do they covet most, Cate?

Cate

Boys?

C.J.

[Accent] Hm, yes. Many, many boys.

Cate

Well, I was just in their room...

C.J.

[Accent] Snooping, Clarice?

Cate

I was cleaning! Anyway, i found my suitcase, and a bunch of websites about hotels.

C.J.

[Accent] Bridget and Kerry, hotel, boys. One banana, two banana, three banana, four.

C.J.

[Bad French Accent] What we have here, Cate, is a Trash & Dash.

Cate

What's that?

C.J.

[Bad French Accent] The coolest kids in school throw a party. They rent a fancy hotel room, trash the place, then dash out the door without paying. Trash & Dash.

Cate

You used to do that?

C.J.

I said the cool kids! I asked all my friends about it, they're like "no! It's a myth!"

Cate

You know, that actually makes sense. The hotels, the beauty salon, the cool kids didn't invite you. Thanks, C. J.

C.J.

[Bad French Accent] You have to admit, Cate, the world's a much more interesting place with me around.

Cate

C. J., why are you talking like that?

C.J.

I don't know.

Cate

Corn?

Bridget

[VO] The chips are potato and corn...

Cate

[She stands up and knocks a bag over. A flyer falls out that reads "Evergreen - Fresh and Fun"]

Kerry

[VO] We rented... Evergreen. I hear it's totally fresh and fun...

Cate

[Flashback, reading a flyer] An overnight stay in a beautility salon...

Rory

[Flashback, hanging up the phone] That's weird. Travis Stevens just invited me over to his house...

C.J.

[Flashback, sipping a cup of tea] What do they covet most, Cate? Many, many boys...

Cate

Those girls! They are so dead!