Kat Stratford quotes from 10 Things I Hate About You

I feel like a poodle at a dessert buffet. What I wouldn't do for a flat iron right about now.

Kat

People could be losing their homes right now and you're worried about your hair. Ugh, you're worse than Anderson Cooper (looks around).

Ooh, you're looking for Patrick. You like him.

Kat

No I don't.

You want to kiss him.

Kat

Really? Are you five?

I'm just excited to know that you're capable of physical attraction. Now, maybe I won't have to suffer the burden of caring for you and your cats when you're old.

Kat

Sorry, can't take you seriously with your hair like this (twirls Bianca's curls).

Kat

Look, I'm off duty. Fire's over.

Oh, so I guess I don't have to show you what your boyfriend left for you.

Kat

He's not my boyfriend.

(points) Over there. Missy, lighten up - I know a lot of cat ladies who started out like you. (smiles and walks away while Kat goes to see what Patrick left her - her mom's vinyl albums)

(while Kat flips through her albums in disbelief that Patrick was thoughtful enough to bring them) I am so happy we can go home. This evacuation has been nothing but drama.

Walter

The fire is out, the house is safe and no babies were born in the gym. We may all return to our lives. (he gestures to his daughters) come here, come here. Life is great (he kisses Bianca's forehead and puts an arm around each of them)

Kat

Are you drunk?

Walter

Only on life, my darling. And five hundred dollars worth of wine.

Kat

I'm driving.

Kat

(finds Patrick sitting on a ledge on the roof of the school) Don't jump.

Oh, I don't have to, you're here now.

Kat

Okay jump.

I'm only three stories up. All I'd do is break a leg.

Kat

It'd still be worth it.

(points to fire burning in the distance) Come check this out. It's really beautiful.

Kat

If you don't think about all the homes being destroyed.

(leans closer and points) Look over there. UGH! (pretends to be slipping off the edge. Kat cries out and reaches for him) Aah!

Kat

Oh! (walks away from the ledge, Patrick follows)

See, you don't want me to jump.

Kat

You're such a jerk.

Now, I can tell you what I wanted to tell you.

Kat

Ooh, I'm on pins and needles. Let me guess...is it the same thing you wanted to tell the girl downstairs?

Oh, I like it when you're jealous.

Kat

I'm not jealous, I'm appalled- there's a difference.

Look, I was going to tell her that she should stop stalking me.

Kat

Hmm..big words from the guy who shows up unannounced in my bedroom window at eleven O'clock at night. That's way past visiting hours.

You talk a lot. (takes her head in his hands ands kisses her, they continue on for several moments)

Kat

(pulls back, happy) Is that what you wanted to tell me?

Sure (smiles and leans in to kiss her again)

Kat

(breaking away quicker this time) No, seriously.

Oh, seriously? Okay, I realized why I find you interesting.

Kat

Hmm...do tell.

(cupping her face with one hand) You're different from other girls. You have a mind of your own.

Kat

That must be a refreshing change for you.

It is, you're not all clingy and...needy. We can just make-out and it doesn't have to be this whole big thing. (leans in to kiss her but Kat pulls away)

Kat

Right. (moves away) Right, because I'm a total slut. But I have a mind of my own.

No that's not what I meant.

Kat

Well, what did you mean?

I meant you're not living some fairy-tale where I'm your prince charming.

Kat

Trust me. No one would mistake you for prince charming. Prince Charles maybe.

Aah! And we were having such a nice time.

Kat

Unbelievable! I'm worried about losing my home all of my stuff, every memory and you just want to hook up.

Why do you have to make everything so difficult?

Kat

What can I say, I'm not easy. (Leaves the rooftop)

Go after him already. Seize the moment. Life is short, trust me - I know.

Kat

You're old, I get it. (walks around her again)

Ooh.

Do you have keys to any of the classrooms? I NEED you to open one.

Kat

Chastity needs more room for her ego?

Someone brought a family into our room and she's a bit territorial.

Kat

Too bad. Tell Gangus Chastity that there's a fire going on and we all need to pull together.

Yeah, yeah, yeah- we are the world I get it. Can't you just open a door please?

Kat

Not a chance.

Why can't you just help me once? Why does everything you do have to be about principles?

Kat'

Why does everything you do have to be about Chastity? It's pathetic.

Fine, I guess you'd rather be handing out water bottles to old ladies than making out with Patrick Verona but you're right I'm the one who's pathetic!

Kat

(handing a bar of some kind to an old lady) Here you go ma'am.

Kat

I'm not sure actually. (looks at packet to see ingredients, looks up and spots Patrick walking down the hall)

Oh, who's that you're undressing with your eyes? Your boyfriend?

Kat

Ugh, no. Just this guy I know.

Oh, missy I wasn't born yesterday.

Kat

I can see that.

Kat

So you made it, where's your family?

I killed them all. (laughs) They were slowing me down.

Kat

Natural disasters do bring out the best in people. So what was your big epiphany?

(runs up to Patrick's side and puts a hand on his shoulder) You're okay! Did you get my messages? I sent you like a million texts. When are we going to talk? You said you needed to tell me something? (clings to his arm)

(looks at Kat and struggles to explain) Ugh, it's not like that.

Kat

Sure its not. Enjoy your chat. (walks away)

Kat'

That treats me like a laaad-eek! Sweet mother (opens window) What the hell are you doing here? It is eleven o'clock at night! (realises her music is still playing and goes to turn it off, also removing her plate while her back is turned to him)

Isn't it obvious? I'm a vampire I need permission to enter.

Kat

Permission NOT granted.

Vinyl? How old school.

Kat

I keep it real.

I've never seen this beatles album.

Kat

It was only released in the UK. Those were my mom's she was a real purist.

She sounds cool.

Kat

She was. So again, what is with the breaking and entering?

(spins and around and steps closer to Kat) I had something I wanted to tell you.

Can I borrow your- (Patrick and Kat turn to look at her) A male in your bedroom and he's cute! Am I sleepwalking again? (Patrick smirks while Kat pulls Bianca into the room and closes her door, shushing Bianca)

Kat

(Patrick sits down while Kat freaks out) Dad is going to hear you.

Walter

Girls!

Kat

Oh my god! Crap! Crap! Crap! Get out! Get out! Get out! Get out! (pulls Patrick up from her chair and pushes him towards the window) Just a second Dad I'm...indecent!

And in so much trouble. I'm loving this.

Walter

I'm coming in!

We takin' my Bike?

Walter Stratford

Please tell me he's talking about his ten speed.

Kat Stratford

Don't worry we're taking my car.

Kat

I'd hardly call this dancing. These kids are just dry-humping to music.

In that case, care to dance?

Kat

You know, Dad warns us everyday about getting pregnant.

You're lucky. He warns me twice a day.

Kat

Yeah, well, he never mentions all the other ways a guy can screw you.

Amen, sister.

Kat

Oh, I see. When you said, 'wait here' at the dance... you really meant for, like, six days.

If you ever returned a phone call, you'd know I didn't bail on you. I got arrested.

Kat

Oh, and here I thought you were just a jerk. Turns out you're also a criminal.