You Can't Do That on Television · Season 7, Episode 10
“Enemies & Paranoia” · Season 7, Episode 10
In this episode: Mrs. Prevert (1), Ross (1), Adam (1), Alanis Morissette (1), Chris (1), Stephanie (1), Matthew (1)
Ugh! Mom, this food is disgusting! I wouldn't feed this to my worst enemy.
Oh, neither would I, dear. I love you, Alanis; in fact, no one could be closer to me than you are, so I didn't give it to my worst enemy - I gave it to you. Now EAT IT, young lady, every forkful! There's nothing wrong with pureed rutabager! In! Two, three!
"Hulk Hogan vs. Punky Brewster In Mismatch Of The Century" will not be seen at this time so we can make enemies of our audience by insulting them with this presentation.
Hi. Today's show is about something that some of us have a lot of and some of us hardly have any of.
You must mean money, Adam.
No, no, Chris. I mean enemies. Today's show is about enemies and [looking at the script] par-parano--
That's "paranoia", Adam.
Well, what does paranoia-- whatever you--
That word there, the one you can't say right? Paranoia is the feeling that no one likes you, that everybody hates you.
Ah, I guess you know all about that, then.
[Suddenly, a strange beeping noise is heard.]
What's that? What's happening?!
[running in] THE RUSSIANS IS COMING! THE RUSSIANS IS COMING! [screams and runs off]
Ross, are you okay?
Now that's paranoia. Not to mention bad grammar.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's You Can't Do That on Television pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
