(to Vince) Do you know what, I have nothing else to say to you! Except, don't try to call me! Take a look at what you're missing! (clicks cell phone camera) Goodbye!
S3Enough is Enough (2)
I hate Holly! I hate Holly! I hate Holly! I can't believe she and Henry...
Look, if she was going to sleep within the line of succession, then it should have been me, you, and then Henry.
(to Gary) I'll make her laugh!
(to Lauren) I'll have sex with her.
(to Gary) So will I!
S4I Want My Baby Back (3)
Noooooo!
Val, wake up! Val!
Lauren! Oh my god, I'm married. I got married!
WHAT?!
Val (hysterically): YES! I married Todd! The plumber! Oh, wait, there's no ring. And no Todd! Oh, I'm not married! I'm not married. Aah...
Oh! Me neither, and we're over thirty. I hate this game.
Lauren, I had the worst nightmare - I dreamt that I called Rick up and cussed him out really bad and then went to Atlantic City and had a drink - or six - and then I married-
(Vic walks in)
VLVal and Lauren
Vic?!
Honey, you really got to be more careful - you left your wedding ring on the sink. Hey Lauren, long time no see. What's up?
Oh, you know, same old, same old. You?
She didn't tell you? We got hitched. Haha... (leaves the room)
Vic? You've been dating Vic? You've been secretly dating Vic? And I knew there was a chemistry between you two when he was our boss, but you didn't want to date him because he was our boss and now you're married, how could you not tell me?!
I didn't know?
Hey, how come when you drink, you get a husband and when I drink, I just get puffy?
Well, Mr. and Mrs. Fireman are getting an annulment.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, okay! You have been given a gift. God made you drunk and sent you a husband. And not just any one, but someone you already had feelings for!
Ya... Ya... didn't sign here.
Yeah, I'm not gonna, baby.
Say what, baby?
I don't want to end this marriage.
No... no... you have to.
Why?
Because you're an adulterer!
No, I'm not.
Wanna be?
S4Surprise
Where are you going?
I'm going to take a cold... ocean.
Val (looking at her ringing phone): Oh my god, it's Holly.
It's Holly? Oh, hey, she's going to be so excited we got married. Let me say 'hi'.
No! And I can't say 'hi' either because she will sense in my 'hi' that something is wrong, terribly terribly wrong, like we got married!
Oh, look at you, you're all feisty in the morning! I like that.
Stop liking me!
Oh, thank god she's okay!
Why wouldn't she be okay? Nothing crazy at all happened while you were gone.
Because, I just got home and there's a prowler in the loft and I might have killed him.
Hey, good news Val, Holly might have just killed your husband!
What?!
Nothing! Bye-bye!
C'mon, let's go.
No, not 'til Vic leaves.
When will that be?
Very soon. I turned the electricity off. I'm sweatin' him out!
Val, he's a fireman. He's good with heat!
Right...
Oh god, oh god, what if Vic never leaves?
What is happening to you? Will you calm down? There are other ways to get him out.
No, Holly, I have tried everything. I begged, I reasoned, I even called the police, but they all know him and they congratulated me. Holly, we are legally married. That sonofabitch fireman is never going to leave.
S4The Redo
When you and Vic got married, did stuff change?
Uh... well, the bartender changed shifts.
What's wrong with you?
So much.
I've been waiting on the terrace for two hours for you to apologize.
Well, I gonna go to apologize to you before, but I thought that you needed time to cool off and so I thought I'd wait 'til the morning and then I really tried to find this middle thing that Val talked-
What the hell is going on? What happened to the girl who used to come yell at me every five minutes? The girl who used to tell me exactly how she felt? Exactly how I felt? The girl who didn't question every move she'd make?
Hmm, I miss her. She still alive?
I miss her too!
I think she left town when you and I started dating. If you forgive her, I could probably get her back.
Get her back.
Do you forgive her?
I forgive her!
(Holly, to Vic's firefighter coat and helmet)
You hang in there, fireman. She's this close.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's What I Like About You pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.