Josiah Bartlet quotes from The West Wing

I hate to do this, but it's Rina, sir. The girl in the dress with the flowers--

Bartlet

Just now?

Yes.

Bartlet

What'd I call her?

Lana.

Bartlet

Who's Lana?

I'm guessing an exotic dancer from your spotty youth.

Who's at the top of the list? [sees Bartlet's hesitation] If I leaked it, would they believe me?

Bartlet

Brad Shelton.

[hesitant] Really.

Bartlet

You don't like him?

He's a fine jurist. And in the event that Carmine, Lafayette, Hoyt, Clark, and Brannagan all dropped dead, the middle would still be well tended.

Bartlet

[Chuckling] You want another Brady.

Sure. Just like you'd like another Ashland, who wouldn't? The court was at it's best when Brady was fighting Ashland.

Bartlet

Plenty of good law written by the voices of moderation.

Who writes the extraordinary dissent? The one man minority decision whose time hasn't come but 20 years later, some circuit court clerk digs it up at 3 in the morning. Brennan rallying against censorship, Harlans jeremiad on Jim Crow.

Bartlet

Maybe you someday.

Hm. They can't put me on The Court. Just like you can't put Evelyn Lang on The Court. It's Sheltons from here on in.

Bartlet

There are 4000 protesters outside this building, worried about who is going to land in that seat. We can't afford to alienate all of them.

We all have our roles to play, Sir. Yours is to nominate someone who doesn't alienate people.

Josh

Sir, have you read the talking points?

Bartlet

I'm an economist. Some would say half-decent. I don't need a primer on this.

Charlie

Due respect,sir, your answers on economics can be a bit---

Bartlet

Polysyllabic?

CJ

Academic.

Leo

I was going to go with incomprehensible.

Josh Lyman

We made a promise.

Bartlet

There was a man named Canute, one of the great Viking kings of the 11th Century. Wanted his people to be aware of his limitations, so he led them down to the sea and he commanded that the tide roll out. It didn't. Who gave us the notion that Presidents can move the economy like a play-toy? That we can do more than talk it up or smooth over the rough spots? It's a lie. What we really owe that union is the truth.

Josh

We run around saying free trade creates high-paying jobs.

Bartlet

And it will. But I've been trying to tell you it's not that simple.

Leo

I'll set up a call with Bill Parsons.

Bartlet

It'd be nice to roll back that tide, wouldn't it?

Josh

Yes, Mr. President, it sure would.

I'm still laughing.

Bartlet

Real reason I went for a second term: couple more years between this gig, the Gridiron, and the Alfalfa Club, I'll be ready for the Def Comedy circuit.

I'd hold out for Vegas, sir.

Bartlet

My first Correspondent's Dinner was a nightmare. Bombed.

Leo

Put that behind you tonight.

Bartlet

I killed.

Bartlet

They laughed till they cried. They're still crying.

Honestly, sir, in my case, it's the pollen count. But for an Anglo-Saxon, you were darn funny.

Bartlet

When I came into office, we knew the word "terrorist." It was in the daily briefing. But we pictured guys with turbans in the desert or some mad survivalist in a cabin in Montana. That party's over. Now anyone with high school chemistry is a potential threat.

That's a lot of enemies, sir.

Bartlet

Too many.

Bartlet

The Mideast reminds me of that joke about the optimist and the pessimist. The pessimist says "Everything is terrible. It can't get any worse." The optimist says "Oh, yes it can."

Kate

It can get easy to forget that there's a silent majority on both sides who just want to live their lives.

Bartlet

Unfortunately, you spend all your time focusing on what's drowning them out: the invective and bomb blasts.

Kate

Isn't it our ultimate moral responsibility to them?

Bartlet

It's quicksand. An ego trip.

Kate

Sir?

Bartlet

Chasing that Nobel Peace Prize right down the same sinkhole.

Kate

After 50 years of strife and futility, there's no dishonor in failure. The only dishonor might be not to try.

Leo

The country wants action. Bringing Farat back to the table--

Bartlet

I'm not saying it's Camembert and wine, I'm saying it's what we got! Tell Hutchison to find a way to get Nassan without taking out a city block, I'll launch the damn missile myself!

Bartlet

They want peace but I have to blow something up first?

Leo

I think they are willing to haggle on the peace part.

Bartlet

That usually work in the past?

Leo

Sir, the Lincoln Battle Group will be in position sometime tonight; they're awaiting your order to strike Nassan and the Syrian camps in the morning.

Bartlet

What?

Leo

We can't wait for Farrad. The risk of losing Khaleel Nassan is too great. We have intel linking Iran to the martyrs, it's sketchy in spots, but overall it's a compelling case. I'm recommending you include Iran in the attack.

Bartlet

General Alexander went ahead with plans for these bombings?

Leo

At your request.

Bartlet

I said I'd consider it when the time was appropriate! I did not ask–

Leo

He was trying to anticipate your eventual need, sir. At my urging...Mr. President, please, Congress, the Joint Chiefs, the American public, your own staff, everyone disagrees with your assessment of the situation.

Bartlet

Killing Palestinians isn't going to make us feel safer. They'll kill more of us, then we'll have to kill more of them. It's Russian Roulette with a fully-loaded gun!

Leo

We can't allow terrorists to murder our citizens–

Bartlet

Why would they do it? Why would Palestinians murder American government officials? They never have before. They're deliberately provoking us, Leo. They know that we have to retaliate. They've studied us; they want us to overreact–

Leo

This isn't overreacting. It's the appropriate, balanced–

Bartlet

Tell me how this ends, Leo! You want me to start something that may have serious repercussions on American foreign policy for decades, but you don't know how it ends!

Leo

We don't always know how it ends!

Leo

...The Lincoln will be in position in a few hours, and then you are going to have to give the go-ahead for the bombings.

Bartlet

...Or what?

Leo

I can't support this decision. For a short period, we may be welcome. But what happens when we have to start kicking in doors? Declare martial law? Enforce curfews --

Bartlet

Once they establish a rule of law, and their economy settles down, they'll be quiet --

Leo

This isn't a romp in the desert! You're committing American lives to something that may go on for decades!

Bartlet

[angrily, nearly shouting] How are we not involved now-- [suddenly goes quiet, looking back at the house, then, quieter, shaking his head] We can't keep having this argument.

Leo

No, sir, we can't. If my counsel is no longer of use to you, perhaps–

Bartlet

So, if I disagree with your advice, you have to threaten me?

Leo

This is your own League of Nations, and it will ruin you like it ruined Wilson.

Bartlet

Okay. I'll need your successor in place before you leave.

Bartlet

Any ideas on how to break the logjam?

Josh

Too bad Congress isn't here. They'd just cook the books and hold a press conference.

Abbey

[about Leo's heart attack] Stress actually restricts the flow of blood to the coronary arteries. What I'm saying is it's physiological. Unless you wanted him meditating his way through intelligence briefings and sleeping in a flotation device... There's nothing you did–

I fired him.

Abbey

What?

Last night at Camp David, I fired him. What does that do to the flow of blood?

Toby

We're fumbling. Our diplomatic strategy is a game of telephone.

Bartlet

Read the coverage. We're doing fine.

Toby

Today, sure, and the second day's story is how you pulled it off. But the third-day story is that Congress doesn't want to pay, that our coalition's fraying, that the spokes are coming off the wheels–

Bartlet

It's a couple of days. This was totally unexpected.

Toby

No, it wasn't. Not with Leo's history with alcohol, with pills. Mr. President, surely you had a process in place.

Bartlet

Not for this. You think we'd even be doing this without him?

Toby

No, sir, but Leo is one person and there are 290 million more and they come first.

Abbey

You think this is your fault? It's not.

He's my best friend. I'm not the kind of person who has best friends.

Abbey

Because your life is your work, and so is his; your work.

What are you trying to say?

Abbey

You chose this; both of you. You're running a country, for God's sake, not a tree house.

Well, Leo stays in the tree house if he wants to. We'll work around his recovery; half-days, whatever it takes.

Abbey

He's not going to work half days. He's not going to work around his recovery. He's not going to do whatever it takes.

That's his decision.

Abbey

And we know what that decision is going to be.

So I should wake him up and fire him again? Because it worked so well the first time?

Abbey

Let's talk about this time. You've got to keep him out of that job. He'll kill himself for you if you don't.