“A Fish Called Selma” quotes from The Simpsons

Movie For A Rained-Out Ballgame now returns to Dyan Cannon, Troy McClure, and the Muppets in the 1977 film The Muppets Go Medieval.

Oh princess fair, wilst thou grant me thine dainty hoof in marriage?

Oh, Sir Lies-a-lot, I will! [they kiss before Sir Lies-a-lot pulls away to growl seductively]

Unhand thee swine, you swain! Come, Piggy, back to Hamelot!

Not now, frog. Me and Iron Pants are just getting acquainted. [Sir Lies-a-lot draws his sword and starts dueling the knight with very stiff and awkward coreography]

Lisa

[watching the movie, bored] Dad, what's a Muppet?

Homer

Well, it's not quite a mop, and it's not quite a puppet, but man... [starts laughing, then stops] So to answer your question, I don't know.

Bart

Why'd they make that one Muppet out of leather?

Marge

That's not a leather Muppet, that's Troy McClure. Back in the 1970s he was quite the teen heartthrob.

Homer

Troy McClure? That guy's a freak!

Marge

What are you talking about?

Homer

You know, his bizarre personal life. Those weird things they say he does down at the aquarium. Why, I heard--

Marge

Oh, Homer, that's just an urban legend. People don't do that kind of thing with fish!

Troy McClure?! You said he was dead!

Fat Tony

No, what I said is that he sleeps with the fishes! You see--

Uh, Tony, please, no. I just ate a whole plate of dingamagoo.

Troy, Mac Parker! Ever hear of... Planet of the Apes?

Troy

Uh, the movie or the planet?

The brand new multimillion dollar musical. And you are starring... as the human.

Troy

It's the part I was born to play, baby!

Selma

[to Marge] Remember when we were kids, we used to dream about our ideal husbands? Who knew the dream would come true for one of us? [uncomfortable pause] Oh, come on! Guess which one.

Homer

I know! I know! It's Selma, right?