Do I smell cupcakes? [opens the oven] Ooh, do I ever!
Uh-uh, Homer. Lisa's making these for her teacher.
Ah. Say no more. [closes it and seconds later Bart opens it]
Yum! Don't mind if I do!
Bart! [drags him back into the kitchen]
Oh, man!
“Bart the General” · Season 1
In this episode: Bart Simpson (4), Homer Simpson (3), Marge Simpson (2), Milhouse Van Houten (1), Nelson Muntz (1)
[daydream begins] Okay, Nelson. Put up your dukes! [a big shadow looms over him] Whaaaa! [runs into a school hall and closes the door, getting punched by a big hand, Nelson stomps the door down] Yikes! [throws a knives at Nelson, as he drags them off]
Ha, ha, ha! [Bart grabs a machine gun and fires at Nelson] Ha, ha, ha!
Oh! [throws a machine gun at Nelson, who catches and eats it whole. He screams as he runs up some stairs, which he's followed by Nelson, the stairs stops at a dead end and Nelson is about to pick him up] Uh-oh.
Mmmmmm, lunchtime! Ha, ha, ha! Lunchtime!
[As Nelson swallows him whole, Bart screams while he travels down Nelson's esophagus. The nightmare ends as Milhouse wakes Bart up, telling him that it's lunchtime]
Lunchtime, Bart. It's lunchtime.
I ain't gonna get out of the fourth grade alive.
Well, Bart, I hope you're going straight to the principal about this!
I guess I should do that.
What?! And violate the code of the schoolyard?! I'd rather Bart die!
What on Earth are you talking about, Homer?!
The code of the schoolyard, Marge! The rules that teach a boy how to be a man! Let's see: Don't tattle, always make fun of those different from you, never say anything unless you're sure everyone feels exactly the same way you do, and what else...?
[strict] Yeah, right! This ought to be good for a laugh!
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, contrary to what you've just seen, war is neither glamorous nor fun. There are no winners, only losers. There are no good wars, with the following exceptions: The American Revolution, World War II, and the Star Wars trilogy. If you'd like to learn more about war, there's lots of books in your local library, many of them with cool, gory pictures. Well, good night, everybody! Peace, man.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Simpsons pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.