Mr. Sheffield quotes from The Nanny

Kaitlyn how many times do i have to tell you i'm a married man

Fran

I'll tell Kaitlyn then I'll kill her

Oh Fran Darling what are you doing here?

Fran

Who's coming that you don't want me to meet?

Oh Darling. For Heaven's sake we're married now i don't need to continue to... (he Laughs), Lynn Redgrave

Turn it into a sitcom.

Why?

'Cause I like funny.

Mr. Sherry, my play is an allegory dealing with early man's struggle to survive.

So was the Flintstones.

You see, Maury, I am a man of the theater and there is such a thing as artistic integrity. And I can't sign this! I have an obligation to...

You'd make more money in one season of a sitcom than a ten year run of Cats.

Do you have a pen?

Yetta

Don't worry, Frannie. Your father's a very good man. Sylvia wouldn't throw that away for some fling.

Exactly. Yetta's absolutely right. I'm sure this thing with your mother and her doctor won't last.

Yetta

My daughter's dating a doctor?! WHOO-HOO!

Grace

She's rehearsing us until two in the morning!

C. C.

It's because you stink!

C.C., what do you expect when you choose "Antony and Cleopatra" for a grammar school?

How hard is it to play a pushy broad who runs around half-naked with too much makeup on? [To Grace] Have you learned nothing from your mother?

Nanny Fine I realize I have to accept the fact that you snagged my boyfriend and are about to breed what should be my babies

C.C

My Babies

you do realize that's my wife your speaking to.

Fran

Sweetie, I'm sorry. It's just that they're upset over Niles. They can sense these things.

They're rubber and their butts are stamped "Made in Taiwan". What can they sense?

Fran

That their daddy doesn't love them.

ME, You're the one who almost melted Frankie on the toaster oven.

Fran

well I was trying to make you a pita pocket, I need Niles.

Darling i know he's your best friend i know how you feel about him.

Fran

I know it must be hard for you to see Ms. Babbcock go seeing as you both were romantically involved.

Maxwell Sheffield

we were not.

Fran

Just Checking

Maxwell Sheffield

darling i don't know maybe this is the best thing for both of them, I mean you and I we made a huge change in our life, maybe they deserve to do the same.

Fran

oh i know you're right I'm being selfish there a so many things a man like Niles can do out there. Can you think of any?

C.C will be alright she can find a position in any organization that needs a, an um. we have to stop them.

I just don't understand! What happened? Five hours ago, they were at each others throat.

Fran

Apparently, they decided to move downward.

Darling, I've been thinking. There's no way this contract between Yetta and Webber could possibly be valid. I mean, let's face it, Yetta isn't exactly in her right mind.

Fran

Sweetie, just because she thinks we're Robbie and Laura Petrie and she's our neighbor, Millie? She's just occasionally confused.

Occasionally?

[About Fran and her pregnancy] Ever since she entered her third trimester, her mood swings have been lethal.

Niles

Oh, I know. It's worse than when Sylvia gave up chocolate. That was the most unbearable hour of my life.