The Looney Tunes Show quotes

Oh hey Lo... (Lola instantly responds)

Lola

(while staring at him furiously) Who is she?!

Who?

Lola

That ugly woman I saw leaving your house and driving your car.

First of all she's not ugly, and second of all that was me.

Lola

Say what?

It's very simple, Tina's going to beauty school but Daffy's doing her homework for her. So I was wearing a wig that he was cutting, when I remembered I was late for a dance class that I agreed to take with Porky.

Lola

(appears displeased with Bugs' explanation) How dumb do you think I am? (menacingly while walking backwards) I'm gonna be watching you. You hear me? Watching you. Like a hawk. I'm watching you. (Destroys the mailbox and trips over her car) Ouch. Uhhmpp!!! Off! Where'd that come from?! Watching you!

Lola

(after the end credits) That's the end of the... (loses balance and falls off the WB shaped door) Whoa.. (thuds offscreen)

(as he nearly drowns in his bed sheets) I regret nothing! (Daffy rises back up) Except for not buying those life jackets. (he wakes up in the hospital after nearly drowning) It was a dream. It was all a dream. That explains why I was such a horrible person and did all those horrible things.

Ehh, not a dream. You are a horrible person and you did do those horrible things.

(after the end credits) Psst. Hey, you wanna buy a watch?

The butter is hard!

What?

I said the butter is hard because somebody failed to let it soften before serving dinner.

I'm sorry i just got so busy with the creme brulee--

But you're not too busy to make excuses!

Ow! That hurt!

I bet it hurts because it's hard!

Are those store-bough rolls?

Ow!

Of course you're saying "OW!" They're like rocks.

[crazed like] I got the shelf up!

(after the end credits) I still think Porky is the murderer.

What's wrong with me? I can't do anything but think about that red dot!

[to Wile E. Coyote] Uhh, good luck. You know, with whatever you're...going...through.

[as Sylvester jumps out of her hands] It's okay, baby, you figured it out. It's not the red dot that you want, it's your mama.

[tearing up] I haven't seen her since she retired to Florida.

[entering the house] We won again! One more goal, and the bobcats are state champions!

Oh, that's great! We should have a party to celebrate. [sits up on the sofa, revealing to be fully weight gained; confused] What?

You look different. Did you get a haircut?

No. (I didn't.)

Are those new gloves?

[looks at his gloves] No. (They're not.)

You know, if Daffy's team wins, we should celebrate. Have a party at my place tonight.

Bugs, I don't think I should be your caterer anymore.

What?

Those recipes aren't healthy. No one's supposed to eat that much butter.

Aw, come on. What's the big deal?

I think you're the big deal.

Wait a second. I know what's different about you. You're ten times bigger than you used to be!

What's with the sunglasses?

I'm keeping a low profile.

[knocks off Daffy's sunglasses with her wand; annoyed] You got some nerve!

What? Because of the email? Because I said you're scary witch? You're not!

Speedy

More iced tea?

Not too much ice. [Speedy annoyingly pours the tea on him] You're mad? Why are you mad? Because I said calling yourself speedy sounds braggy? It does. I don't call myself handsome.

Speedy

[annoyed] You know what people should call you? Jerk.

Why is everyone so mad at you?

I accidentally sent a mass email spelling out in great detail how I feel about people.

Ah, who else did you send it to?

Everybody. Everyone I've ever interacted with. Everyone who matters to me, who I have a relationship with. Anyone who makes any impression on me at all. So... everybody. Every single person in my life.

You didn't send it to me.