Timmy quotes from The Fairly OddParents

[rubbing the wands together like sticks] Huh! If I could just light these candles, we could eat!

Did it ever occur to you we're in a fishbowl filled with water?

That's why I'm trying to light these candles. Somebody's got to dry up all this wet food!

Hey guys, what's new? [the candles light]

Uh...the laws of physics?

I thought you liked that other amusement park, Escalator Land.

No way! That park was for babies...

Dad, when do we get to the ride?

This is the ride!

Yippee!

[after being turned into a girl] EEEEEKKKK! What did you do?! I didn't wish for this!

You said "I wish" and "Girl".

[eating Chester-endorsed breakfast cereal] Mmm! These Chester-O's are a great part of any winner's complete breakfast!

Don't you want to try some Timmy-O's? [pulls out a cardboard box of cereal oats with a crude crayon drawing of Timmy taped onto it and we hear a laughing baby in the background]

That loser cereal? That's for pack-mules. Son, I need to achieve.

[cereal is thrown into fish bowl] Hey! These are for pack-mules!

[as a girl] I'm going out to the mall to find something Trixie would like. But just so you two have something to laugh at while I'm gone- [to Cosmo] I wish you were a woman, [to Wanda] and you were a man!

What?!

You're my godparents. No choice. [Cosmo and Wanda do as Timmy asked] Congratulations. You're now Cosma and Wando!

[after Chester bunts the ball, and it grinds against his braces] Wait! It bounced against his braces and split into twenty-seven separate, yet still-in-play, pieces of baseball.

[with a calculator] Let's see... 3 outs each times 9 players...twenty seven outs?!

That's nine innings of outs in one swing!

Game over! Losers lose!

And that's all you need to know about where babies come from!

But what's the machine for?

I'll tell you when you're older!

[greeting Timmy] What ho, tiny knight with a shield that smells like a hundred horses' butts? I am on my way to pull the sword from the stone, and claim my rightful place as King of England.

And you are-?

I have many names; the Shining Knight, the Hammer of Fury. But you, my fellow warrior, may call me... Sir Finkleberg.

Finkleberg? What kind of dumb name is Finkle- [gets stomped into a crevice by Finkleberg; then pops back up] Cool! I got trampled upon by Sir Finkleberg.

[with Cockney accent] Oh no! Without our wands, we can't use our magic to change everything back!

[with Cockney accent] I say, this is a bit of a stickywicket! [normal voice] I mean, dude! This reeks!

Oh no! One of them is going to turn the future America into a yellow-toothed-electricity-deprived rathole!

Yeah! And the other one is going to turn it into a brightly-lit democratically-run rathole!

Hey, guess what, Timmy, we're gonna grade you on your performance! We'll give you an A-! [holds out an A-]

An A-minus?!

Up-bup-bup, questioning the grades, that gives you a B. [holds out a B]

But...

Talking back, that gives you a C! [holds out a C]

A C?!

Raising your voice! D! [holds out a Q]

That's a Q!

That gives you an F, smarty pants! [hands him an F]

[Timmy is playing a Crash Nebula video game, like he did back in "Smarty Pants."] Hey, are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Uh... never cook bacon with your shirt off? [whistling, removes shirt and tie, bacon splatters out of the pan]

No. I wish my life had a reset button!

This time I'm ready for Crocker's stupid test!

Heh. Good news, Turner. You've taken F to a new level. I'm going to give you a Super F! Heh-heh-eh-eh-heh!

A D! As in...don't get your hopes up for a high-paying career! [chuckles]

B! As in...but you're not supposed to be this smart.

An A-! As in...oh, wait, I give so few A's, I have no prepared sarcasm.

Do I think Timmy Turner is neat? Actually, my love for him burns with the white-hot intensity of a thousand suns, but I can't let Trixie know that. [typing] No way, he's gross!

Oh, great. The crazy one likes me.

I'm going as your mom!

And I'm going as your dad!

And I'm going straight to therapy.