Lisa quotes from The Drew Carey Show

Lisa

Excuse me, Mr. Carey?

Drew

I'm sorry, my father's Mr. Carey. I'm Mrs. Carey.

Lisa

Want to smile so I know you're kidding?

Lisa

Hey, I'm just making small talk. I do that when I'm nervous. What do you do?

Drew

Isn't it obvious?

Lisa

You eat?

Drew

Shut up. I sweat.

Drew

Wait! I want kids!

Lisa

Drew, I can't do this for you.

Drew

Then I'll have the kids. Look. I have child-bearing hips.

Lisa

It wouldn't have worked out. Your face is too fat.

Drew

Yeah? Well, your calves are too close to your ankles.

Lisa

Your ears aren't level. [walks away]

Drew

[shouting] Yeah, neither are your breasts! [quieter] Did I just say that aloud in front of the entire office?