Lt. Provenza quotes from The Closer

Provenza

Taylor, what you doin' with our suspect?

Taylor

You know how it is, Provenza; the Pope giveth and the Pope taketh away.

Provenza

After Taylor got him to confess, I went out...

Buzz

I?!

Provenza

Alright, WE, went out to find security tapes.

Provenza

[Handing out latex gloves] You might want to double up on your protective gear since this is a homocide.

Brenda

You seem to be having trouble with your pronunciation this evening.

Brenda

They can even register as domestic partners, have the same rights as married people.

Provenza

Serves 'em right, too. Why shouldn't they suffer just like everybody else?

Provenza

Taylor, what you doin' with our suspect?

Taylor

You know how it is, Provenza; the Pope giveth and the Pope taketh away.

Provenza

After Taylor got him to confess, I went out...

Buzz

I?!

Provenza

Alright, WE, went out to find security tapes.

Brenda

We are running him down the flagpole and that's all that there is to it. If you want to examine the body, you may do so after I'm done.

Brenda

I'm done.

Provenza

I'm glad he's dead, 'cause that would have really hurt.

Brenda

We are running him down the flagpole and that's all that there is to it. If you want to examine the body, you may do so after I'm done.

Brenda

I'm done.

Provenza

I'm glad he's dead, 'cause that would have really hurt.

Gabriel

Lieutenant, are you all right?

Provenza

Oh, I don't know. I think I broke something!

Brenda

I am shocked that you would assault an old man without provocation!...Sergeant Gabriel, check and see if a paramedic can come down here and take a look at Lieutenant Provenza. [To Provenza] Are you ok?

Provenza

Old man?

Gabriel

Lieutenant, are you all right?

Provenza

Oh, I don't know. I think I broke something!

Brenda

I am shocked that you would assault an old man without provocation!...Sergeant Gabriel, check and see if a paramedic can come down here and take a look at Lieutenant Provenza. [To Provenza] Are you ok?

Provenza

Old man?

I wasn't asked to confirm the identity of the victim, just to confirm that the body was that of Lisa Barnes.

Provenza

Oh, so you had an excuse to be sloppy.

I wasn't asked to confirm the identity of the victim, just to confirm that the body was that of Lisa Barnes.

Provenza

Oh, so you had an excuse to be sloppy.

Provenza

Is that a rat?

Flynn

That's his hair replacement system.

Provenza

His what?!

Flynn

They used to call it a toupee.

Provenza

They used to call it bald, too.

Brenda

[After catching Provenza mocking her accent and task delegation] Lt. Provenza, I need this hurried through [using extra-heavy accent] SID, in about two shakes of a lamb's tail. [shaking wet toupee at him] Thank you so very much. Let's keep it taped off, ladies and gentlemen, because until we understand things better...[turns and looks at Provenza]

Provenza

Uh, [adding heavy southern accent] this is a crime scene, y'all.

The Drill Team was his first film as a producer. And it never would've gotten made without me. I set it up; I attached Dick.

Provenza

[watching the interview] I bet she attached dick to a lot of things.