Sam Winchester quotes from Supernatural

Sam

[staring at frog on the road] Yeah, you're right, that's completely normal.

Dean

All right, maybe it is fairy tales. Totally messed-up fairy tales. I'll tell you one thing, there's no way I'm kissing a damned frog.

Sam

[gesturing to pumpkin on porch] Hey, check that out.

Dean

Yeah? It's close to Halloween.

Sam

Remember Cinderella? The pumpkin that turns into a coach and the mice that become horses?

Dean

Dude, could you be more gay? Don't answer that.

Sam

I think it's Snow White.

Dean

Snow White? Ah, I saw that movie. Or, the porn version anyways. There was this wicked Stepmother. [hoots] She was wicked.

Dean

You know what he said. Some good advice.

Sam

Is that what you want me to do, Dean? Just let you go?

Dean

What a crazy old broad.

Sam

Why, because she believes in ghosts?

Dean

Ha ha, look at you. Sticking up for your girlfriend, you cougar hound.

Sam

Bite me.

Dean

Hey, not if she bites you first.

Sam

How do you sleep at night?

Bela

On silk sheets, rolling naked in money.

Dean

Can I shoot her?

Sam

Not in public.

Dean

Hey, Bela, how'd you get like this? Huh? What, your daddy not give you enough hugs or something?

Bela

I don't know. Your daddy give you enough? Don't you dare look down your nose at me. You're no better than I am.

Dean

We help people.

Bela

[scoffs] Come on! You do this out of vengeance and obsession. You're a stone's throw from being a serial killer. [Dean looks over to Sam] Whereas I, on the other hand, I get paid to do a job, and I do it. So you tell me, which is healthier?

Sam

Bela, why don't you just leave? We've got work to do.

Bela

Yeah. You're "o" for two. Bang up job so far.

Sam

That vampire's still out there, Dean.

Dean

First things first.

Sam

Gordon.

Dean

About that, when we find him, or if he finds us.

Sam

Yeah?

Dean

Well I'm just saying, he's not leaving us a whole lot of options.

Sam

Yeah, I know. We've gotta kill him.

Dean

Really? Just like that? I thought you would have been like, "No, we can't, he's a human, it's wrong."

Sam

No I'm done. I mean Gordon's not gonna stop until we're dead. Or 'til he is.

Sam

You know what, man? I'm sick and tired of your old stupid kamikaze trick.

Dean

Whoa, whoa, kamikaze? I'm more like a ninja.

Sam

That's not funny.

Dean

It's a little funny.

Sam

No, it's not.

Dean

What do you want me to do, Sam, huh? Sit around all day writing sad poems about how I'm going to die? You know what, I've got one. [picks up notepad] Let's see, what rhymes with, "Shut up, Sam"?

Sam

Dude. [knocks the notepad out of Dean's hand] Drop the attitude, Dean. Quit turning everything into a punchline. And you know something else? Stop trying to act like you're not afraid.

Dean

I'm not!

Sam

You're lying. And you may as well drop it cause I can see right through you.

Dean

You've got no idea what you're talking about.

Sam

Yeah, I do. You're scared, Dean. You're scared because your year is running out, and you're still going to Hell, and you're freaked.

Dean

And how do you know that?

Sam

Because I know you!

Dean

Really?

Sam

Yeah, because I've been following you around my entire life! I mean, I've been looking up to you since I was four, Dean! Studying you, trying to be just like my big brother. So, yeah, I know you. Better than anyone else in the entire world. And this... is exactly how you act when you're terrified. And, I mean, I can't blame you. It's just...

Dean

What?

Sam

It's just, I wish you would drop the show and be my brother again. 'Cause... just 'cause.

Gordon

You have no idea what I faced. To get here? I lost everything. My life. But it's worth it, because I'm finally gonna get to kill the most dangerous thing I ever hunted. You're not human, Sam.

Sam

Look who's talking!

Gordon

You're right; I'm a bloodthirsty killer.

Sam

Don't talk about it like you don't have a choice!

Gordon

I don't.

Dean

So was I right? Was it the serial killing chimney-sweep?

Sam

Yep. It's uh, it's actually Dick Van Dyke.

Dean

Who?

Sam

Mary Poppins.

Dean

Who's that?

Sam

Oh, come on. Never mind.

Sam

I mean, I'm just saying, that there's some version of the anti-Claus in every culture. You've got Belsnickel, Krampus, Black Peter, whatever you want to call it there's all sorts of lore.

Dean

Saying what?

Sam

Saying back in the day, Santa' brother went rogue and now he shows up around Christmas-time, but instead of bringing presents he punishes the wicked.

Dean

By hauling their asses up chimneys.

Sam

For starters, yeah.

Dean

So this is your theory, huh? Santa's shady brother?

Dean

What are you talking about? We had some great Christmases.

Sam

Whose childhood are you talking about?

Dean

Oh, come on, Sam.

Sam

No, just... no.

Dean

All right, Grinch.

Dean

Christmas is Jesus' birthday.

Sam

No, Jesus' birthday was probably in the fall. It was actually the Winter Solstice Festival that was co-opted by the church and renamed Christmas. But I mean the Yule log, the tree, even Santa's red suit, that's all remnants of Pagan worship.

Dean

How do you know that? What're you gonna tell me next? The Easter Bunny's Jewish?

Dean

I hate witches. They're always spewing their bodily fluids everywhere.

Sam

Pretty much.

Dean

It's creepy. Hell, it's downright unsanitary!