John Sheppard quotes from Stargate Atlantis

You are more like Wraith than you know.

Lt. Col. Sheppard

I'm not sure I like the sound of that.

There is much about Wraith that you do not know, Sheppard.

[waking up] Ah, Sheppard. I thought you ...

Lt. Col. Sheppard

There's a lot you don't know about humans.

Jeannie

Holy cow! That can't be good for your health.

Lt. Col. Sheppard

Nothing to worry about. I've done it dozens of times. John Sheppard.

Dr. McKay

She's married, and she's my sister.

Lt. Col. Sheppard

[defensively] I'm just saying hi.

Dr. McKay

Yeah, no, I know exactly what you're doing. I've seen that look before...Kirk.

Dr. McKay

What did Elizabeth say?

Col Sheppard

Two McKays are better than one.

Dr. McKay

There aren't two McKays, there's one McKay and him.

Teyla

Is that what made all these people kill each other?

Dr. McKay

I hope so.

Lt. Col. Sheppard

You hope so?

Dr. McKay

Otherwise, there are two bizarre things going on, and one is more than enough for me, thank you very much.

Dr. Weir

How are Rodney and Teyla?

Dr. McKay

He shot me!

Lt. Col. Sheppard

They're both fine.

Dr. McKay

You shot me!

Lt. Col. Sheppard

[visibly upset] Yes, Rodney, I shot you, and I said I was sorry!

Ronon

You shot me, too.

Lt. Col. Sheppard

I'm sorry for shooting everyone!!

Lt. Col. Sheppard

Life isn’t fair – it’s just fairer than death.

Dr. Weir

Oscar Wilde?

Lt. Col. Sheppard

The Princess Bride. Good movie.

Lt. Col. Sheppard

You should call her.

Dr. Beckett

Who, Cadman?

Dr. Weir

You two did make a cute couple.

Dr. Beckett

It didn't work out. May have something to do with our first kiss being through Rodney.

Dr. McKay

Oh, I thought we made a solemn vow never to speak of that again!

Dr. Beckett

I remember no such thing.

Colonel Sheppard, I'm going to assume you're still at the Midway Station waiting for Dr. McKay to rewrite his macro. I understand what you're doing, Colonel - Hell, I'll even call it brave, but if you don't turn that ship around immediately and come back to the SGC, I'll see to it personally that your career in the military is-

Lt. Col. Sheppard

That way I won't know what he was gonna say.

Dr. Beckett

My turtles!

Dr. Weir

What?

Dr. Beckett

I just bought some wee baby turtles and no one knows to feed them!

Dr. Weir

Well, turtles are pretty hardy. I’m sure they’ll be fine.

Lt. Col. Sheppard

And they make good soup.

Dr. Weir

Hey, if we keep this up, there won't be much of a city left to save.

Lt. Col. Sheppard

I'll try to run the drones into your least favorite buildings...McKay!

Dr. McKay

It should be working!

Dr. Beckett

Well, it's not working!

Dr. McKay

Look, if I give him any more power, he'll wake up and kill us all!

Dr. Beckett

Their ear-drums have been perforated.

Dr. Weir

How?

Dr. Zelenka

The whales are emitting an intense, low frequency pulse...like...like a sonar; as well as an EM field. The combination is very dangerous to humans - particularly in such close proximity.

Dr. McKay

[having heard none of this; his voice raised] It's the whales!

Dr. Beckett

[ignoring Rodney] Their hearing's been impaired; it should heal soon...

Dr. McKay

[continuing anyway; his voice still raised] It's their echolocation! It's creating very powerful vibrations! The closer we got, the worse it became!

Dr. Zelenka

Yes... [Raising his voice] Yes Rodney! We know!

Dr. McKay

[after a brief pause] Oh!

Lt. Col Sheppard

[after an even longer pause] What?

Lt. Col Sheppard

[attempting to get Rodney's attention] Canadian Football league is a joke.[he pauses, then continues when Rodney fails to react] Celine Dion is overrated. [a second pause] Zelenka is smarter than you are! [a third pause]

Dr. McKay

[having heard nothing] Hey! I found mention of a biolab in the database. Ancient scientists used it to study animal life. We should check it out.

Lt. Col Sheppard

Okay...Meredith.

Dr. McKay

(Talking about Kolya and his men) What if they burn down the village out of spite?

Well, that'll be petty of them.

Lt. Col. Sheppard

Yeah well, they're like that.

Dr. Zelenka

Normally if Dr. Esposito weren't around, I doubt you would have been as reckless as you were.

Dr. McKay

Are you insane?

Lt. Col Sheppard

Which one is Esposito?

Dr. Zelenka

Oh, the long dark-haired...

Lt. Col Sheppard

Oh, right, the one with the perky little...

Dr. McKay

Do you mind?! We're trying to work here.

Lt. Col Sheppard

For the record I was gonna say 'smile'.

Dr. McKay

Ya, I'm sure you were.