[Amy is still stuck inside the cage, looking upset. She smells something]
[The wall is destroyed, showing Sticks, Knuckles, Tails, and Sonic, who are dirty.]
It's us! We snuck in through a sewer pipe!
I was wondering how long it would take for you guys to miss me.
We may have a hard time saying it, Amy, but... well, you know.
[Tails runs over and deactivates the cage, freeing Amy]
There's no way were going back out the way we came in. Care to do the honors? [Hands Amy her hammer]
[Sonic and Amy are waiting in line at the cashier's counter.]
Man, I am starving! Next exit: Munchytown. Population: us.
[Just as Sonic walks up to the cashier, Dr. Eggman cuts right in front of him immediately]
Hey, no cutsies! I was here first!
No way, Egghead! We've been waiting!
DIDave the Intern
Um, I believe the barrel-chested gentleman with the luxuriant mustache was first.
Sonic, let's not make a scene.
That's how we do it! Score one for Eggman. [Starts dancing as techno music plays. Sonic and Amy watch, unimpressed.] Just gotta flash the 'stache.
[Eggman is eating a burger. There are fries and a drink on his table.]
Mmm, now that's good! How's yours over there? Oh, right. Yours isn't ready yet. Should have been faster, Sonic! [Laughs evilly]
[Dave carries a tray to Sonic and Amy's table.]
Okay, here we are. Two double Meh Burgers with extra pickles.
[Laughing] Oh, this is just the best day ever!
[Eggman is eating burger and then interrupted by Dave.]
[Clears throat] I'm Dave, big fan of yours, sir. I've studied all of your attacks: the Bee Bot gambit, the lair gambit, the gambit gambit.
Ah, yes, that one was doubly risky. I like the cut of your jib. How'd you like to be my unpaid intern?
It'd be an honor to work for you without pay.
Did I mention I like you jib-cut-wise?
Wow! I'm really here! Where do I start?
Even though you're only an intern, there's an important job that I can't trust Orbot and Cubot to do.
[Eggman bring the mop to Dave.]
Mop the bathroom!? Wow! Back at Meh Burger, I'd have to be a manager to do that.
[Dave runs off]
You two could learn a thing or two from this kid.
[Dave is throwing out the trash, Orbot and Cubot are spying on Dave.]
This new intern worries my circuits. I fear that his enthusiasm for the most menial tasks causes us to appear inferior by comparison.
Yeah, he's making us look bad too! He does more sucking-up than my cousin, Suzanne. And she's a vacuum!
[Dave is secretly listening to Orbot and Cubot's complaints.]
Cubot! Cubot! Cubot, where have you gone?
[Orbot goes through a door to a that leads to a dark, empty room.]
[Orbot turns on his built-in flashlights. Oil drips on him.]
[Camera shows a trapdoor, oil dripping on the outside with a rope attached. Orbot pulls on the rope and the trapdoor opens as pieces fall out. Orbot screams. Camera shows Cubot in pieces. Orbot screams again.]
I could build a robot to do this, but there's just something about unpaid labor that makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside.
[Dave comes upon Eggman's old Doomsday Device.]
Oh, just my old Doomsday Device.
It's magnificent! I bet it could destroy a hundred worlds!
Well, maybe not a hundred, but, if I connected that power supply... one definitely, heh heh heh.
[Orbot comes in carrying Cubot's pieces.]
Dr. Eggman, sir. It's Cubot! He's been disassembled!
I don't have time for you two! Can't you see I'm enjoying quality time with my protege? So, where were we? Ah, yes. You were praising me. You were leaving.
[Camera shows Orbot depressed as he leaves.]
You'll never get away with this, Eggman!
Sonic will see you coming from a mile away!
[Inside, it is revealed that Tails, Knuckles, Amy, and Sticks have all turned evil and have Eggman's mustaches on their faces.]
Yeah! If we wanna trap Sonic, we got to think like Sonic!
[Dramatic music plays and the camera shifts to all of Sonic's evil friends before stopping on Eggman.]
This is even better than I hoped! Five evil genius masterminds!
Actually, I'm an evil mastermind of average intelligence.
Five evil genius masterminds, give or take. Working together under my leadership, we'll be unstoppable!
So here's the plan! We wait at the beach shack for Sonic, and then bombard it with an all-out robot assault from five different sides! [Moves the figurines around]
No, no, no! [Has a badnik figurine] What we should do is tunnel underneath to bypass his defenses!
[With a flying badnik figurine] We should attack from above by plane!
We have to get rid of his stupid friends first!
Calm down! Even though you're evil geniuses now, for the most part, you lack experience. Time for a crash course in villainy! [Laughs manically]
[Later, Eggman is in the classroom with the others.]
Evil lesson number one: Berating your underlings! Orbot. Would you kindly hand out the worksheets?
Gladly, Sir. [Proceeds to do so]
[Stops Orbot with a ruler] Not that worksheet, you dunderhead! [Knocks some of the worksheets off] See? It's that easy.
[The others write down what they saw. Now in Eggman's monitor room.]
Lesson number four: Surveillance! There's nothing more evil than recording your subjects without their knowledge. [Looks over to Orbot and Cubot messing around]
[Wearing a Viking helmet] Ota oh ha! Ota oh ha!
Get me a monkey wrench. I'll fix that.
[In a different room.]
Lesson number seven: Mustache care and maintenance. Fifty strokes every morning. But don't overdo it!
[Her mustache is messed up] Don't ask..!
[Back in the classroom.]
Lesson number twelve: Lesson numbering! Evil lessons should be numbered as followed: "1", "4", "7", "12", "16".
[Outside of the lair.]
Lesson number sixteen: Target practice!
[Eggman, Tails, Knuckles, Amy, and Sticks all fire at Orbot and Cubot with Disintegrator Rays.]
We must procure assistance.
We don't have time for that! Let's just get help!
Yeah! [Places a golf ball on a tee] Who's gonna take it downtown? Knuckles! That's who! Gonna pour Sonic a hurt-tonic. And the pain is gonna be chronic!
Okay, we get it. [flips a coin]
Tails! [Turning his attention to Tails] Tails, you flip it! Not sure I trust this guy.
[Sonic gives the coin to Tails who flips it in the air.]
[The coin lands on Tails' wrist and he flips it over to reveal it as tails.]
[Sonic tosses his golf ball into the air and hits it with his club. The golf ball then flies right into the hole and rolls back down the mountain where it pops up from a hole and Sonic catches it.]
[Knuckles heads over to swing his gofaball and the golf ball rolls toward the hole but a leaf lands on it causing it to move the other way.]
Aw, come on! You saw the wind blew that, right? [Swings another gofaball but it hits some birds.] What?!
You gotta factor in bird migration. That's Gopher Ball 101.
[Knuckles growls and goes to swing another ball. However, it ends up going past the hole and Knuckles tries again. He tries again over and over until he tires out.]
Maybe you need to work on your swing.
You kidding me?! It has nothing to with my swing! It has everything to do with luck!
[Sonic and Tails just stare at him and Knuckles takes another swing where the ball actually stops in midair before landing. A frustrated Knuckles throws his club which actually lands in the hole and Knuckles screams loudly. Like a "Gaaaaah!".]
[Knuckles is seen pacing around with Amy and Sticks watching him.]
Knuckles, I see you're upset. But...
Don't bother trying to get me to talk about my feelings!
Actually, I was gonna try to get you to stop killing my grass.
Sonic the Luck Monkey beat me in Gopher Ball by getting totally lucky!
I thought you didn't want to talk about your feelings.
I don't! I just wanna yell!
We all get into a slump now and then.
Oh, really? How many times have you lost to Sonic this week?
[Starts counting with his fingers.] I told you. I don't want to talk about this!
Maybe, there's a disturbance in the Luck Balance of the Universe.
That could happen? Stupid universe.
What you need to do is burn through the rest of this losing streak, by bringing yourself as much bad luck as you can, as fast as you can, to speed up shifting the Luck Balance of the Universe, back the way it was, before this all happened!
[Amy and Knuckles stare at each other.]
Yeah. That's right. You heard me.
Shift the luck balance of the universe? Really?!
I can't believe I never thought of this before!
[Punches a rock formation causing a boulder to fall on him. Knuckles then perches himself over a crater.]
When the luck balance of the universe shifts against you, just get it all over with as quickly as possible to shift it back. [Jumps into the crater.] It's like one of those things. When you hear it, you're like "Duh! That's so obvious!"
[Crawls out and climbs over into a cannon.]
Plus it plays to my strengths of taking horrible, [Cannon fires.] painful, [Hits a tree.] brutal punishment. [Falls to the ground as a beehive lands on him] Ah! I can almost feel my luck changing already!
[Reading a book before noticing Knuckles.] Oh man, Knuckles. You okay?
[Covered in bruises.] Am I okay? Are you okay, you mean?! [Flicks Sonic's nose.] Or are you getting too nervous about the Gopher Ball beat down heading your way. [Coughs and wheezes] Give me a minute! It's hard to trash talk with a punctured lung.
Looks to me like you're not in much condition to play anything.
Ha! You only think I'm not in much condition to... whatever you said! But, in fact, I finally tipped the luck balance of the universe back in my favor! Your lucky streak is over, Sonic! Brace yourself, my friend. 'Cause there's nothing but sunny skies ahead for this- Oof! [Is suddenly crushed by a refrigerator.]
[Dr. Eggman is preparing for a game of laser tag]
Even with a mind as powerful as mine, it's important to keep the reflexes honed. [Turns to Orbot, Cubot, and some other robots.] That's why you robots will serve as my opponents in this training exercise. [Gives Orbot and Cubot some Disintegrator Rays on low setting] On your marks, get set. Go!
[Eggman and his robots start to fire at each other and Eggman finds himself cornered.]
Ow! Is someone stepping on my mustache?!
[The robots look around to see who is stepping on it.]
Wait. No one's stepping on your-
[Eggman runs past the robots where they start to shoot at him. However, Eggman trips but his laser manages to hit all of the robots' targets.]
If I didn't know better, I'd say there was a shift in the Luck Balance of the Universe.
[Meteors are raining down with Knuckles at the bottom trying to get hit by one of them.]
Come on, meteors! Take your best shot!
You've got to do something! He's going to hurt himself!
What do you suggest we do?
You could lose to him on purpose.
What else ya got? [Tails and Amy have no other ideas. Sonic sighs.] I'll talk some sense into him. Leave it to me. [Jumps down and runs to Knuckles.] Knux, you're wasting your time with this luck stuff. I've been beating you lately entirely due to skill.
Skill! By the way, I beat you in this argument just now.
You didn't win yet, because I'm still saying the word 'luck'. Luuuuuck!
[Knuckes gets crushed by a meteor while Amy facepalms at this.]
Can we discuss this somewhere else?
Sonic and his friends always defeat me by the slimmest of margins. But with the luck balance of the universe shifted entirely in my favor, there's never been a better time to attack!
[Orbot and Cubot look at each other confusingly.]
So let us attack, this instant! With everything we got! Bring the Mega.
Sticks, you gotta help us make Knuckles stop right away! He's gonna get hurt!
Not if he shifts the luck balance of the universe in time.
I guess he'll probably be eaten by a carnivorous plant and slowly digested over a period of weeks or months.
And, we agree that's not good right?
I can think of worse. But I've got confidence in him!
Confidence in a guy who believes your crazy theory?
Did you just call my theory, crazy?! [Growls]
[Sonic helps Knuckles from under the meteor.]
So, Knux, I was kinda hoping we could get you to stop this nonsense before an asteroid pulverizes you into baby food. Any suggestions?
Admit that luck is the only reason you've been beating me all this time!
How about we have a rematch right now? Skill vs. Skill!
[Knuckles smiles agreeing to the idea.]
[Sonic and Knuckles are about to play another game of Gofaball.]
Go ahead. Take your shot.
Don't you feel the ground rumbling?
[Knuckles swings and the ball ends up hitting Eggman's Eggmobile when he was passing by.]
Okay, that there was a little weird. I'll give you that.
A little?! Are you kidding me?!
[Eggman starts attacking the village and attacks a hut where the roof flies off into the air. Sonic runs off.]
[Eggman, Orbot, and Cubot all laugh.]
The invasion is going swimmingly! And me, without my floaties on! [Laughs evilly again but notices that Orbot and Cubot didn't laugh with him.] Note to self: Leave hipper diabolical banter.
