[Sonic and Amy are waiting in line at the cashier's counter.]
Man, I am starving! Next exit: Munchytown. Population: us.
[Just as Sonic walks up to the cashier, Dr. Eggman cuts right in front of him immediately]
Hey, no cutsies! I was here first!
No way, Egghead! We've been waiting!
DIDave the Intern
Um, I believe the barrel-chested gentleman with the luxuriant mustache was first.
Sonic, let's not make a scene.
That's how we do it! Score one for Eggman. [Starts dancing as techno music plays. Sonic and Amy watch, unimpressed.] Just gotta flash the 'stache.
[Eggman is eating a burger. There are fries and a drink on his table.]
Mmm, now that's good! How's yours over there? Oh, right. Yours isn't ready yet. Should have been faster, Sonic! [Laughs evilly]
[Dave carries a tray to Sonic and Amy's table.]
DDave
Okay, here we are. Two double Meh Burgers with extra pickles.
[Laughing] Oh, this is just the best day ever!
[Eggman is eating burger and then interrupted by Dave.]
DDave
[Clears throat] I'm Dave, big fan of yours, sir. I've studied all of your attacks: the Bee Bot gambit, the lair gambit, the gambit gambit.
Ah, yes, that one was doubly risky. I like the cut of your jib. How'd you like to be my unpaid intern?
DDave
It'd be an honor to work for you without pay.
Did I mention I like you jib-cut-wise?
DDave
Wow! I'm really here! Where do I start?
Even though you're only an intern, there's an important job that I can't trust Orbot and Cubot to do.
[Eggman bring the mop to Dave.]
DDave
Mop the bathroom!? Wow! Back at Meh Burger, I'd have to be a manager to do that.
[Dave runs off]
You two could learn a thing or two from this kid.
[Dave is throwing out the trash, Orbot and Cubot are spying on Dave.]
This new intern worries my circuits. I fear that his enthusiasm for the most menial tasks causes us to appear inferior by comparison.
Yeah, he's making us look bad too! He does more sucking-up than my cousin, Suzanne. And she's a vacuum!
[Dave is secretly listening to Orbot and Cubot's complaints.]
Cubot! Cubot! Cubot, where have you gone?
[Orbot goes through a door to a that leads to a dark, empty room.]
[Orbot turns on his built-in flashlights. Oil drips on him.]
[Camera shows a trapdoor, oil dripping on the outside with a rope attached. Orbot pulls on the rope and the trapdoor opens as pieces fall out. Orbot screams. Camera shows Cubot in pieces. Orbot screams again.]
I could build a robot to do this, but there's just something about unpaid labor that makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside.
[Dave comes upon Eggman's old Doomsday Device.]
Oh, just my old Doomsday Device.
DDave
It's magnificent! I bet it could destroy a hundred worlds!
Well, maybe not a hundred, but, if I connected that power supply... one definitely, heh heh heh.
[Orbot comes in carrying Cubot's pieces.]
Dr. Eggman, sir. It's Cubot! He's been disassembled!
I don't have time for you two! Can't you see I'm enjoying quality time with my protege? So, where were we? Ah, yes. You were praising me. You were leaving.
[Camera shows Orbot depressed as he leaves.]
DDave
Welcome to Meh Burger. Can I take your order?
Dave! I'm glad I found you, friend. We need your brilliant mind.
DDave
I'm sorry. We're all out of that. May I recommend the Meh Rib Sandwich? They're only available for a limited time.
[clenches his fist] What's going on here?! Everyone seems to be the opposite of their normal selves.
Hmm... I think I understand what's happening. They say it's available for a limited time to create a false demand.
Also, I just figured out that this guy is from another dimension!
Another dimension? You mean with duplicates of each of us?
[nervous] What if another of me shows up? I can't trust me. I'm a loose cannon! [screams and runs away]
SHShadow the Hedgehog
[off-screen] So this is why you called me here.
[gasps and drops the cheese tray] Shadow the Hedgehog… Hey everybody, look! Shadow's here! I knew springing for those embossed invitations would impress!
WBWeasel Bandit
Who's he?
He's only the second most popular character in the whole canon! Let me get you a chair, Mr. Shadow. [pulls the chair out from under Dave the Intern, sending him crashing to the floor]
DDave
Ow...! [Eggman pushes the chair over to Shadow]
(The scene opens at Sonic's shack, where we see him sleeping)
(sleep-talking) No, stop! You're pure evil! Why are you coloring my arms!?
(Some spit lands on Sonic, causing him to wake up and come face-to-face with a gross creature.)
Ahh! (smells the animal) Ugh! You need a bath and a shower. And to get the heck outta my shack! What are you, anyway?
(The creature bellows, tripping Sonic off his hammock.)
BBeaver
Actually, it's a widabit. A very rare and majestic species.
Doesn't seem so majestic to me.
(At Meh Burger...)
So, how are things at the man cave? You two must be having a blast.
Heck, yeah! I love destroying Tails in Mutant Wrestling every night! Ain't that right, pal?
(laughs nervously) Yeah...
DDave
Order up for..."Sanic".
Uh, I think you mean "Sonic".
DDave
No, it says "Sanic" right here.
This'll take a minute. (Rushes off)
You guys gotta help me! I don't know how much longer I can handle this. Sonic may be my best friend, but living with him is a nightmare! Any idea how much longer the widabit will be staying in Sonic's shack?
Could be months. You can't hurry love.
But maybe you can push it along...
Sonic Boom · 106 quotes
