[after Mr. Conductor's story] I'm glad the forest has grown back.
CMr. Conductor
Forests do that. Leaves do, too. But friendships-- They can't grow back once they're broken. That's why we always have to take care of them.
Tea sets don't grow at all.
[approaches with her newly-repaired teapot] But thank goodness for glue!
[notices the pot's cracks] But it's still cracked. I'm sorry. Next time you tell me not to touch something, I won't do it.
Apology accepted. But you know, besides, I like these cracks. It gives it character, and it makes me think of all of you.
CMr. Conductor
Stacy, are you calling me a crackpot?!
[the two Mr. Conductors confront each other]
CMr. Conductor
He's not me!
ECEvil Mr. Conductor
Yes, I am!
CMr. Conductor
I'm much taller!
ECEvil Mr. Conductor
No, you're not!
CMr. Conductor
You're fatter, though.
ECEvil Mr. Conductor
No, I'm not! We're the same!
CMr. Conductor
We're not the same at all!
ECEvil Mr. Conductor
Yes, we are!
CMr. Conductor
No, we're not!
ECEvil Mr. Conductor
Yes, we are!
CMr. Conductor
I can prove it! That cutout fits my outline perfectly. It won't fit yours.
ECEvil Mr. Conductor
Will too!
ECEvil Mr. Conductor
Will too!
CMr. Conductor
Be my guest!
[the Evil Mr. Conductor runs over to the cut out space where he used to be a picture and lies down in it]
ECEvil Mr. Conductor
You'll see that I'm you, then you'll know that it's true.
[Mr. Conductor throws his magic dust on the Evil Mr. Conductor]
[the Evil Mr. Conductor turns back into a picture]
CMr. Conductor
Well, I'm here to work. What's our first step?
Uh, your first step, Mr. Conductor, is to watch your step. That shelf hasn't been... [the shelf comes off, and Mr. Conductor slides down] ...nailed in.
Mr. Conductor, are you all right?
CMr. Conductor
Alright?! I appear for work and fall off a shelf? I've had better jobs, I'll tell ya.
You have to go back now. You promised.
ECEvil Mr. Conductor
I won't go back! Not this time! A broken promise is not a crime.
Well, then, I'll tell on you.
ECEvil Mr. Conductor
Tell. Go ahead. They'll just get angry and sent you to bed.
ECEvil Mr. Conductor
Stick him quick! He'll get away!
CMr. Conductor
Wait! I'm me! He's not!
ECEvil Mr. Conductor
Stick him with that gluey pot!
Which one of you's Mr. Conductor?!
ECEvil Mr. Conductor
My whistle?!
CMr. Conductor
My whistle!
[the evil Mr. Conductor blows his whistle, which sounds like it used to be for the real one's whistle, and the real Mr. Conductor blows his whistle, which is still at its low toot from earlier; Kara pours the glue on the evil Mr. Conductor]
ECEvil Mr. Conductor
NO!!!!
[he turns back into a picture]
CMr. Conductor
YES! Thank you, Kara. If you hadn't recognized my whistle, we'd have never gotten out of this mess!
Of course you know me. I'm your nephew, Dan.
Oh, hi. Nice to meet you, Dan.
[they shake hands as Mr. Conductor appears]
CMr. Conductor
Hi, Dan. Hello, Stacy. [Stacy looks at him]
[shrieks] A little man! [hides behind the information desk]
Aunt Stacy, come back! It's only Mr. Conductor!
[Mr. Conductor disappears, then reappears on the information desk; Stacy reacts]
CMr. Conductor
You don't have to be afraid of me. My name is Mr. Conductor, and I've known you since you were Dan's age. I knew your parents when they were Dan's age. I live here in the signal house on that mural.
Ladies and gentlemen, cast and friends, Shining Time Station is proud to present... Oh. Mr. Conductor, what's your title?
CMr. Conductor
Producer/director.
No, no, no, no. I mean, the title of the movie.
CMr. Conductor
Oh. A Little Light Madness.
...Proud to present, A Little Light Madness, starring... starring everyone.
[after the prank pulled on Schemer has backfired] Stacy, we're really sorry.
We let things go too far.
Will Schemer really lose the arcade?
I don't think so. I think if we talk to Mr. King and explain what happened, everything will be all right, just as long as it doesn't happen again.
[Mr. Conductor appears]
Oh, Mr. Conductor. What do you think? Should we help Schemer?
CMr. Conductor
I think so. This wasn't entirely his fault. But we better help him soon so he has time to get ready like me.
For tomorrow, which is really April Fools Day. And Schemer's gonna hafta go through this all over again!
[all five laugh]
[hands Mr. Conductor an envelope] This came in the mail for you today. It has no address on it, but I guess it's for you.
CMr. Conductor
[opens the envelope] Let's see. Who could be writing to me?
[he extracts a letter from the envelope and reads it]
CMr. Conductor
Oh, no. No! This can't be happening! No way!
CMr. Conductor
My sister's coming for a visit.
CMr. Conductor
Well, I know we had the same parents, and we grew up in the same house. But somewhere along the way, my little sister was raised by laughing hyenas.
Little sister? How little is she?
CMr. Conductor
Oh, she's grown up now, but you never know it.
CMr. Conductor
Well, you see how neat and polite I am? She's messy and rude. She got away with everything when we were kids.
CMr. Conductor
One night at dinner, she took off her shoes and socks and put her feet in the mashed potatoes! UGH! Another time, she took my drawings and made paper airplanes out of them!
Well, she was younger then. She wouldn't do that now.
CMr. Conductor
Oh? What about the time she threw my favorite mittens in the toilet?!
Maybe she was just trying to have some fun.
CMr. Conductor
She had fun, all right. She laughed about it for weeks.
Still, it's nice when relatives come to visit, remember?
[Mr. Conductor finds his sister with the Jukebox Band]
CMr. Conductor
I have been looking everywhere for you!
SCSister C
Hey, there, big brother! Look at all these tiny people I found. They talk too much, but I've got them under control.
TTito
[laughs] Your sister's quite a card. A joker!
She was just tellin' us about when you was younger.
And your pants fell down!
[the band breaks into laughter]
SCSister C
Well, that's pretty much the bare facts.
Yeah, the long and the shorts of it.
CMr. Conductor
How could you?!
KKit
Hey, Mickey, I'm going to the clubhouse. Are you coming or not?
MMickey
The clubhouse? Oh, yes. Quite. I mean, sure thing. [to Kara and Becky] Excuse me, ladies.
[as he leaves, Kara and Becky are left astonished]
"Excuse me, ladies"?! He's so... polite.
Should we ask him to be in our play? He'd be a perfect prince.
I don't know. I wonder what a real prince would be like? [Mr. Conductor appears] Hi, Mr. Conductor.
CMr. Conductor
Hello, Kara. Hi, Becky.
Mr. Conductor, have you met a real prince?
CMr. Conductor
Not exactly, at least not yet. But Thomas has lots of experience with crowned heads. He's even met the Queen.
KBKara and Becky
[in unison] No!
CMr. Conductor
Yes! [blows his whistle]
Shining Time Station · 68 quotes
