Slater quotes from Saved by the Bell

Jessie

Slater, since we both work we should share the household chores.

Slater

Sure, you cook and I'll eat

Jessie

You macho pig!

Slater

Oink oink, baby!

Do you boys take these girls to be your school wives?

Zack

Oh, you bet!

Slater

I guess.

Screech

WHA-HOO!

That's what Mrs. Belding said when we got married. Girls?

Kelly

I do.

Jessie

I do.

Lisa

I don't.

Zack

We weren't arguing.

Slater

We were doing a math problem, how two and one won't go.

Mr. Dewey

I don't believe it and I don't care. I'm tired, I have a toothache and I have to go home and pump iron.

Zack

Hi, you're new here. I'm Zack Morris.

Slater

And I'm Roger Rabbit, so what?

Slater

(to Kelly) (putting onion ring on her finger) I think we're engaged.

Kelly

I think I'm gonna cry.

Zack

That makes two of us.

Slater

We pumped helium in Valley's music room. Now their Glee Club sounds like the Chipmunks.

[higher-pitched voices] Oh when the saints go marching in!

Zack

Every time I call her she's washing her hair! Who washes their hair six times a day?

Slater

You do!

Slater

Hey, Screech. Want me to get you anything? A Coke, some fries...a hot dog?

Screech

(crying) Dog? (puts head on table)

Zack

So what if they had him since he was a puppy?

Screech

(squeaks) Puppy?

Jessie

All right, one date. But Nerdstrom better keep his paws to himself!

Screech

(wails) Paws!

Kelly

Where's Rod?

Zack

I'll go look for him.

I can't believe you're doing this! The class trip leaves in 5 minutes!

If you met this stewardess, you'd know. She's a 10.

You're doing this to spend time with some stewardess?

This is not just some stewardess. This is Inga and she's only in town for the weekend.

What am I supposed to say to the students? That you dumped them for a weekend fling?

Of course not! Tell them I'm sick, tell 'em anything. Cover for me!

I'm tired of covering for you!

Come on, Richard, don't be mad. We're brothers.

May I have your attention, please? I have some bad news. My brother Rod cannot take you on the class trip.

Slater

I guess we won't be going anywhere now.

Let's go home guys. (They start to leave)

Hold on, everybody. I may not be a great rafting expert like Rod or even as cool a guy, but I would like to try and take you.

Kelly

Really, Mr. Belding?!

If you don't mind a leader who can't swim too well! Let's get going!

Zack

Mr. Belding, why didn't you tell them the truth?

The truth?

Zack

About the stewardess? I heard everything.

I'm sorry you had to hear that. Besides, I know how much you kids looked up to him. Heck, Rod always was the most exciting Belding.

Zack

Maybe so, but we got the better Belding.

Good morning. My, don't you look nice!

Zack

[deep voice] Hey, there, Jennifer.

How are you feeling today?

Zack

My head is feeling hot.

This is a most unusual reaction to a flu shot. Sit down and wait here.

Zack

Jennifer, is that you?

Slater

[falsetto] Uh-huh.

Zack

Jennifer, are you not going to come in?

Slater

Nuh-uh.

Zack

Fine.

Zack

ACK! What happened to Jennifer?!

Slater

Who cares? Take me! I'm yours!

Zack

What did you hear?

Slater

Enough to destroy your relationship with Kelly! I can strike a deal to keep this between you, me and the curtain if you do something for me .

Zack

What?

Slater

How would you feel about taking another flu shot?

Zack

Deal.

Okay, which one of you is A.C. Slater?

Zack

I am.

Bend over, Blondie.

Jessie

Slater, who do you think will come out on top today?

Slater

Call it a hunch, but I think Screech is gonna kick that commie's butt!

Jessie

Slater, we're on the air. In this age of Glasnost, you don't say "kick the commie's butt"!

Slater

Oh, sorry. What I meant was "kick that commie's heiny"!

Slater

[smiling] So what happened, Preppie? Did she turn you down?

Zack

Guess again, my high school friend. Danielle my collage friend just asked me to meet her tomorrow night at "The Attic".

Screech

Wow, the attic. That is cool. There could be bats up there.

Slater

YOU'RE bats, Screech. "The Attic" is an 'over 18' club, and Zack's only 16.

Zack

That may be true, Slater. But by tomorrow morning, we'll all be 18.

Screech

Oh, no! Mom said I have to move out at 18. I gotta look for a place!

Zack

Wouldn't hurt.

Slater

How about five friends?