Piper quotes from Royal Rumble

I wanna make this clear right now that the views of Sgt. Slaughter and General Adnan do not in any way reflect the views of the World Wrestling Federation, or the Arab-Americans, or the overwhelming majority of Arabs throughout the world, for that matter.

Well, I understand that, Gorilla, but I wanna make a point. This is America, and as much as I hate his guts, you can do what you want to in America, and Slaughter is free to do. That's why our men and women are over there now. They are fighting for the right to be free! If I don't like it, I'll get in the ring and I'll do something about it, but this is America, and that's why we're all here! God bless America!

[Having just thrown Sensational Queen Sherri onto Randy Savage, the Ultimate Warrior is jumped from behind by Sgt. Slaughter] Oh! What a hard knee. [Slaughter bounces Warrior's head on the second rope, attempting to choke him, as referee Dave Hebner gives Slaughter the 5-count. Slaughter breaks at 4. Just as he does, Savage gets up and winds up his scepter] Wait... wait... [Savage crowns Warrior with the scepter] NO!

Oh, look at that! With the scepter right between the eyes! What is this, Hot Rod?!? It's 3-against-1 here!

The referee... The referee, I don't think, saw it! [Slaughter pries Warrior from the second rope] No! [He drops an elbow on Warrior and pins him] No, no, no... not like this!

[as the referee counts] What is this?!?

[The referee counts three] No... oh, wait a second, NOW what? No, no... they can't allow this!

Certainly they're not going to allow this!

No, no... some... there's going to be officials coming out here!

We might have had a disqualification here, I hope.

Well it's obvious! The King came out with a scepter! [Hebner, unsure of what to do, wanders around aimlessly] COME ON!

Everyone in the entire building saw what the Macho King did!

No, this ain't going down like this! [By this time, the crowd is yelling "bullshit!"] What do ya mean, "What happened?" What the hell do ya think happened?

I think the referee, in this excitement, Hot Rod, just automatically went down and made the three-count. [Warrior, having come to his senses, starts to stagger out of the ring] But I think we have a disqualification here.

I hope so. Excitement, hell! He ought to be keeping his eyes on what's going on!

We haven't had any official word yet.

[Warrior runs out of the arena, in hot pursuit of Savage] Where's he going?

I think he's going after the Macho King.

Ladies and gentlemen, here is the official decision. The winner of this bout...and NEW...

NO! NO!

[as he continues, the title belt is handed to Slaughter] ...World Wrestling Federation Champion: Sgt. Slaughter!

Bull! Bull!

What a miscarriage of justice! I can't believe it!

That's bull! You're not gonna let this hang like this! I can't believe this! You puke! It took three of you!

I don't believe it! This is ridiculous! This is an outrage!

[walking down the aisle, pointing to his many detractors] I told you!

You told us what?! You can't do nothing by yourself!

Well he'd better cut that thing in half, Hot Rod, and give half of it to the Macho King!

[after Virgil drops the Million Dollar Belt in front of him] What do you think you're doing? You get down there, and pick that thing up right now, and you wrap it around my waist. Need I tell you, need I remind you one more time about your family? About your mother?

Give me a break.

Virgil, remember it just don't matter.

Pick it up!

Remember, Virgil, there comes a point...

Wrap it around my waist!

What, are you gonna need it for the rest of your life?!

How humiliating.

That's right. That's right. Like I always say: everybody's got a price... [He is cut off by Virgil, who wallops him with the belt]

Oh, he NAILED him!

YEAH!!! YEAH!!! YEAH!!!

Listen to this capacity crowd, they love it!

We don't wanna forget, being that it's a rumble, it'd be okay for Fuji to deck Blubber Love.

Oh, I'd like to see that.

I'm still expecting #18 to show up. He's not officially out of here until the clock starts for the next participant.

Yeah, but we don't know who #18 was.

I know, but he's still got a chance to come out...maybe, I don't know, but until that clock starts again, #18 is still legal. I'm not sure...

[as the 10-second clock appears] I believe that is a first in the history of the Royal Rumble that the time limit ran down and nobody came through the curtain.

Too late now, 18's outta there. [Buzzer sounds for entry #19: Animal] WHOOAAA!!

It's Animal from the Legion of Doom. Well, whoever, Hot Rod, #18 was, he has forfeited his position here in the lineup, so there's no way, shape or form that he can re-enter and be victorious.

He is history, baby. If you don't got the guts, you don't belong in the building.

How long has it been for Valentine?

Well, the Hammer has been in well over a half an hour.

What tenacity! The Model, too.

But you know, with Valentine, it takes fifteen minutes just to get his attention, and then he starts to get warmed up. The more you beat on him, the more he likes it.

Uh-oh, we're gonna find out right now, Hot Rod, who #18 was—here comes the last entry. [buzzer sounds for entry #30: Tugboat] It's Tugboat.

Wait a sec.

That means that the Macho King was #18.

The Macho King wasn't hurt.

He was one of the odds-on favorites to win this thing.

I can't figure it.

It could be the Ultimate Warrior ran him right out of the building!

It could be! It could be. That's the only thing I can think of.

[Hulk Hogan slams Earthquake after failing to do so earlier] Hulk off... Yes, he got him that time!

[Hogan signals to the crowd] Throw him OUT!

[slowly, Earthquake rises to his feet] I can't believe this, what kind of power the Hulkster possesses... He's setting him up here, look out! [Hogan throws Earthquake out, winning the Rumble] It's over!

What a Rumble!

Here is the winner of the Royal Rumble: the Immortal Hulk Hogan!

Unbelievable victory by that man, Hulk Hogan! What dedication!

What guts! What a Royal Rumble!

[Hogan signals for a sign from the crowd] Well, Hot Rod, he wasn't going to let down our men and women in the Persian Gulf. [The sign says "HULK RULES"] He made a promise that he dedicated this match to all of them, and it doesn't surprise me that he's the last man in the ring.