Queer Eye for the Straight Guy Season 1 quotes

Can I call you Vinny?

Yeah.

Can I call you my bitch?

Can I put my clothes back on?

Ye— second thought, Mmm.

I was just thinking about something. What are the other three guys doing back at my house?

Back at your house they've probably loaded up the spraying painter and are painting your house pink.

Are you guys going to be offended if you come back and it's like...

Organized?

Or gone?

Wow, maybe back up singing isn't such a bad gig after all.

Hey, it's getting better!

No, we're getting drunker!

ANDREW! You only have two pairs of pants!

There might be some....

There might be some? You don't have a complete inventory of all your couture?

[On his first impressions of Andrew] I was like, "Who's the homeless guy stealing the camera?"

We can rebuild you.

Make you better then you were.

[about a crusty towel he found in Andrew's bathroom] What's this, your dreamcatcher?

Do I look like Ben Affleck?

You look like Ben and Jerry Affleck.

[sees Ayanna] Oh hi Peanut. Your boyfriend is working on my last gay nerve.

I could get any gay man to cuff me any day of the week, but no, let the real cop do it. [John still can't cuff Carson] I could've fled the scene in like so many ways by now.

Guns don't kill people! Bad fashion does!

Now turn, turn, turn to the camera. What were you doing?

Eating.

What were you eating?

Cake.

And who does that cake belong to?

John and Ayanna.

That's right, and they are...

Straight people.

The vagina is leaving the building.

No, no, we've still got Jai. He has to stay.