[after Haversham's dog jumps on the window] That dog is kind of an A-hole.
I think he sees something.
Yeah, urine stains on my pants!
S3 E1Ghosts
Is that hot chocolate?
HHaversham
It's Dutch cocoa. Hadewych makes a pot for me each night before she leaves.
I see. Mr. Haversham, in order to fully understand the connection that you have with this ghost, I will need to see what you see. Wear what you wear. Drink what you drink.
HHaversham
You're saying you'd like some hot chocolate?
With marshmallows, please.
Oh my God. This isn't a joke. You're really quitting Psych?
I am so sorry, Shawn.
In a text message, no less?!
Shawn? What the heck are you doing here?
I should ask you the same question.
I work here!
I should ask you a different question.
[1995: At the Santa Barbara Police Station, Henry is seen forcefully escorting Shawn inside. Shawn is handcuffed.]
I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask for that "World's Greatest Dad" mug back.
Mr. Haversham, it is my belief that we have done all there is to do here tonight.
[Lights in Haversham's House flicker rapidly]
Tomorrow we will look into the history of the house, see if there's anything there that can help us.
[Lights malfunction again]
Just don't have any leads at this point.
[Lights malfunction a third time]
So, I think we should all pat each other on the backs for a job well done so far. Reconvene first thing here in the morning for a nice farmer's breakfast.
[Lights malfunction again]
I have dinner plans with my mother.
[All lights turn off.]
S3 E2Murder?...Anyone?...Anyone?...Bueller?
[about his date] We met at the Santa Barbara Bowl at the Ravi Shankar concert last week, and she asked me out on a date.
Who goes to someone else's reunion when they barely even know them?
Who goes to a Ravi Shankar concert?
If Chief Vick knew I was running names for you guys, I'd lose my ass.
We definitely don't want that to happen.
Good talk, Dad. I gotta run. Actually, there is one more thing. Do you think I could borrow your underpants? Just for ten minutes.
...What?
Oh, come on! These are iconic film references I'm making, here!
Mindy, it's official: you've won bitchiest banana.
If I were just some average guy with no super powers I'd say [muttering dumbly] "I dunno; why are you asking me?" But as the head psychic for the Santa Barbara Police Department I say "I don't know. Why are you asking me?"
S3 E3Daredevils!
[Carlton is talking to a woman in his car during a stakeout]
What are you doing?
Oh, I'm just talking to your friend Blair here. She...she's great. We have so much in common.
She's not my friend.
What do you mean? You didn't send her down here to meet me?
No. I don't invite friends to dangerous stakeouts. But I know her. She's a professional.
[to Blair] Please tell me you're a hit-man.
Excuse me, what happened to the last bunch?
DDutch
Well, we can't talk about it for legal reasons. All I know is our attorney said that, "It ain't decapitation if the head don't come off all the way."
Life insurance policy?
It doesn't make any sense.
Tell me about it. ...Dude, seriously, tell me about it. I have no idea what this means.
You never could understand legalese.
Oh really? Remind me who it was who set up our Psych 401(k)s?
Oh, you mean our 601(k)s? Because India doesn't have 401(k)s.
It's a growth economy, Gus. We've already made, like, 500 rupee.
That's thirteen dollars.
They call this a motorcycle show? There's like four motorcycles here. They don't even have the bike from Blue Thunder.
That was a helicopter.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Psych pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.