I hate to say this, but Ann Perkins has terrible taste in rings.
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
When I heard Ben was getting married, I was all, "to Leslie or to Game of Thrones."
Nooooo... Jerry!
[tying his bow-tie] Okay, did I- did I do it right? [the tie is crooked] How's it look?
Terrible. And perfect. I promised myself I was not going to cry tonight. And I have already broken that promise five times. But I will not... break it a sixth.
Go ahead and let it out, buddy. It's okay.
I have something for you.
All right.
It is the letter from the statehouse... telling us that we have been assigned to Pawnee. Dated May 1st, 2010.
[quietly] No way.
We were supposed to be here eight weeks. I'm so happy that those eight weeks turned into three years, and that you met Leslie, and that we both found a home.
Damn it, you're transferring your crying thing over to me.
It's okay, buddy, let it out. [they laugh]
[to Leslie] Before we go inside, I'd like to say something. You are a wonderful person. [voice breaks] Your friendship means a lot to me. And you look very beautiful.
People who buy things are suckers.
Ah, what am I going to do? I just opened a can of whoop ass on myself!
Oh Ann. You're too beautiful to be funny. It's not your fault, you've never had to compensate for anything.
I wish this office was just walls.
Before I write that letter, you have to spend a whole week doing everything I say.
So what, I have to be your slave or something?
No, you have to be my friend
Ugh, that's so much worse.
You're a smart successful young man with an adorable belly.
Last year I won an organic gardening contest.
Who were you competing against?
My own taste buds.
There's only one thing I hate more than lying: skim milk, which is water that's lying about being milk
May I say for the record that is a dope pocket square
HIs nickname around the office is Softypants McHuggable.
We should sue Jamm's parents for spawning a human turd burger.
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