Sam Hanna quotes from NCIS: Los Angeles

Vance

The Comescu family wants you dead, Agent Callen.

Sam

Why?

Vance

Some sort of long running family feud as far as we can tell.

Callen

I don't have... any family... They think I do.

Vance

They probably mistake you for somebody else.

Callen

Probably.

Sam

You hear anything?

Callen

She's still recuperating - like she was last month - and the month before that.

Sam

You think something is going on? Of course. It's Hetty. Something else is going on.

Kensi

Have we heard any news on Hetty's condition?

Sam

According to Nell, Hetty's still keeping an eye on things.

Callen

Big Brother is watching.

Deeks

Or in Hetty's case - Little Mother.

Deeks

What? You guys have been doing this too long. You're getting paranoid.

Hetty

[From Deeks's computer] A healthy dose of paranoia can keep you alive in this business, detective.

Deeks

[yells out startled and slams the computer shut] Whoa! Did you just see that?

Sam

I saw you slam Hetty's face shut.

Kensi

I'll go in as a tutor. Deeks can go in as a dog walker or something.

Deeks

Okay. Why can't I go in as a tutor and you go in as a dog walker?

Sam

It's called a mirror.

Deeks

How dare you, sir! Has anyone here gone to Law School? Huh? Anyone passed the Bar Exam in the State of California? Anyone?... Anyone?

Kensi

This coming from a guy who learned how to tie his shoes at... 12.

Callen

Really?

Deeks

I'm from L.A... I grew up in sandals.

Callen

It's comparing apples and oranges.

Sam

Lethal injection or firing squad.

Kensi

Not really fair to either of them.

Deeks

I'm just saying comparison begs to be made.

Callen

Hetty or Hunter?

Deeks

Pick your poison.

Deeks

Okay, that's my face you just stepped on. Please do something stupid so my partner can shoot you.

Sam

Why'd you run?

Bomb.

Sam

He was saving his furry butt, that's what he was doing. That why they retired him?

Deeks

Actually the vet that did his psyche eval said he had a nervous condition. It's kind of like canine PTSD.

Sam

Puppy Traumatic Stress Disorder?

Kensi

[to a pair who are trying to get surveillance tapes] Federal Agents. Stop!

Deeks

STOP!

Sam

Like she said. Federal Agents. Stop!

Deeks

Why don't they ever stop? It amazes me that they never stop.

Sam

Whoever stole Charlene better hope LAPD catches them before I do.

Callen

You don't mean that.

Sam

Yeah, okay.

Callen

Stage 2.

Sam

What?

Callen

Anger. It's the second stage of grief.

Sam

I'm not grieving. I just want my car back!

Callen

You good?

Sam

Why do you ask?

Callen

So far, you've done a car, a gun and I believe that's a dead body. Amazing detail.

Sam

I'm good.

Callen

It's okay to be depressed.

Sam

I'm not depressed.

Callen

You will be. Stage 4.

Sam

Look, I'm not depressed, bargaining, angry, or in denial. But I *am* getting a little irritated.

Callen

Are you hungry?

Sam

Hunger's not a stage.

Callen

It's true. But loss of appetite is a sign of depression.

Sam

Keep it up.

Kensi

Have you guys seen Deeks?

Callen

Uh, good morning to you, too.

Kensi

Hi. Have you heard from him?

Sam

It's only 9:00.

Kensi

I know, but he was supposed to pick me up at the airport this morning and he never showed.

Callen

That's right. How was Hawaii?

Kensi

It was fine.

Sam

Meet anyone? Go to any luaus? Solve any crime?

Kensi

It was fine. Back to Deeks. I called his house number, I called his cell. No answer anywhere.

Callen

He's probably just hungover.

Sam

Or surfing.

Callen

Or he forgot.

Sam

Or all of the above.

Kensi

He has flaked on me before, and I suppose he does sleep through his alarm on a regular basis. So, yeah, you guys are right. Of course. Whatchya eating?

Callen

Bacon, eggs, mine.

Deeks

Really? That's it? No phone calls to the hospital or the morgue? I mean, I could be lying in a ditch someplace.

Hetty

I would love to teach the two of you the traditional Viennese Waltz with each other as partners.

Sam

[chuckles] She's kidding.

Callen

...No, she's not.

Hetty

Agent Hanna, take your partner by the waist - back straight. Do I need to repeat myself.

Deeks

[Kensi's captive. Deeks passes by holding a painting seemingly oblivious] Are you digging the art in this place as much as I am? I mean it's cool. It's bold. Why aren't there more cool, you know? Oh there's another one! I wannna show you this one. This is my favorite [goes off screen] It's the perfect combination of girls and guns. [returns with his weapon drawn] Let me make this perfectly clear. If you harm her, this is gonna be your last day on Earth.

Who are you?

Sam

[Entering from behind with weapons drawn] Federal Agents! Drop you weapon!

[In recognition] Agent Sam Hanna.

Sam

Turn around - slowly.

Callen

There's a leak.

Sam

If Khaleed knew about me, I'd be dead already.

Callen

Doesn't mean it's not gonna happen.

Sam

I'm staying in, G.

Kensi

Hey, Nell, whatever happened to that file I asked you for? The one on the aryan low rider that Deeks shot at the park.

Nell

Oh right, um, I'm sorry I guess I forgot.

Kensi

You never forget anything, Nell.

Nell

Um, yeah. I told them this wouldn't work.

Eric

Okay, so right after you guys left Monica Lee's office, she called a pay phone located two blocks away from the LAPD Precinct. I'm seeing a dozen other incoming calls to her PDA over the past few days, all from pay phones within walking distance of the same area.

Callen

So the mole's definitely a cop or someone who works closely with them.

Sam

And he's making life way too easy for Fisk. If we don't find him, that RDX is as good as gone.

Kensi

[Entering Ops] You kept me in the dark!

Callen

Please tell me you didn't waterboard Nell.

Kensi

The guy Deeks killed this morning, he isn't dead. He's an undercover NCIS agent working out of D.C. , who, in fact, just landed in Dulles Airport alive and well. You stuck fake tattoos on him and made me believe that my partner shot an unarmed man. Why would you do that?

Sam

Had to be convincing for LAPD and Bates or else they never would have taken Deeks back.

Nell

Sorry guys.

Callen

The woman Deeks rescued is also one of ours.

Sam

The whole thing is a setup.

Kensi

That is why you stationed me and Deeks so far away from Fisk and the Aryans. The op this morning wasn't about them. It was about your ruse. I knew something was off. I knew it!

Callen

We suspected Fisk had a mole. It was a ploy to force Bates to cut ties and take Deeks back from us.

Kensi

Do you guys have any idea what I've been through today?

Sam

It was Hetty's call, Kensi.