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S5

Mystery Science Theater 3000 · Season 5

Narrator, Joel [as Narrator] and others in “The Painted Hills”

[The short closes with the cleaned-up teens going to bed.]

NNarrator

And so... the end of a perfect day.

JAJoel [as Narrator]

An entire day spent grooming.

. . .

NNarrator

And you...

JAJoel [as Narrator]

Jezebel!

NNarrator

...by following these simple rules of body care and grooming, you too will [have] that quality of appearance, that feeling of well-being, so important to make your dreams of happiness come true.

CACrow [as Narrator]

And remember--when you touch yourself, the saints cry. Goodnight.

[As we fade out...]

Joel

KEEP WATCHING THE MEDICINE CABINETS! KEEP WATCHING THE MEDICINE CABINETS!

CCrow

You're next!

[A few more names appear]

Servo

[sarcastically] Oh, let's not forget these guys!

The Painted Hills (movie)

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