A character in Lucy, the Daughter of the Devil
I want to push DJing. I want it to be more than DJing, and also less than DJing. That's why I started incorporating nearicles into my set. Nearicles are like almost miracles. You get close, but it's not quite there. It's, it's a nearicle.
A restaurant chain? That's the belly of the beast man. That's awesome. We'll shoot it for the DVD, and we won't just do karaoke, we'll do Escape-Ee-Oke.
Look, if you've got it, flaunt it. Sandals are like bikinis for your feet.
Oh, hey Lucy. Wow, I just had the wildest dream and you were in it! And you Judas! And you Skanky Girl! And Skanky Girl's Friend, you were there too! And Crazy Shirt, you were all there.
Now I don't know you do I? We've never met before?
No.
Is your name Delilah?
No.
Oh. Seriously? I'm usually good at this. Is this your phone number? (Doves crap out number on pavement)
Oh my God, how'd you do that?
I'll call you and tell you later. When we are fucking.
You're not gonna fuck me.
Hello? Open your eyes. It's me on top of you, fucking you.
Hey you smell something? Yeah you smell it, right Judas? Yeah, it smells like fish. Yeah, like right behind (reaches to side of Lucy's head and pulls back arm with a platter of fish in his hand) your ear. Stay for dinner?
Whoa! Pulled out the platter of fish. Dude, cameraman, tell me you got that.
We want your Dad to make a dildo of me breaking the world record for holding my arms out. We're gonna auction it off on holdingmyarmsout.com.
I'd buy it...For my Mom! (silence) Ah. For your Mom! Woo!
Ah, this is a mountain?
It's a small mountain slash hill.
It's a mill. How would you say it?
I would probably not do it like that, I would probably say a himalountain.
Heh. Which is longer than...the whole purpose of smooshing would be to shorten the...
Is that the whole purpose, or is it to have fun?
That's the most awkward way to do it.
Wow one quarter scale diesel cog railway. Who's on board, guys? Chugga, chugga! Come on!
Chugga Chugga?
My problem is that you like to impose your opinion on how I want to do things.
What? What? No I would not.
You would do mill, I would do himalountain. The end.
I agree with you, I'm saying I agree with you.
The end.
What do you mean the end? It's not the end.
The end. You have your opinion, I have mine, so what else is there to talk about?
I don't know, it's just not my thing.
What, it's just what?
Well first of all, I mean, you know, these ladies are kind of old.
Not all of them. Let's go out on the patio, we'll find some baby tigers! Ariel, Brooke, Granny, Ethel, Sadie, Sonia, Navy Seal Nancy-we're goin' out on the patio. Please join us and bring some hard lemonade.
Get behind me Satan!
What? What'd you say?
I said get behind me, you and Betsy!
Becky!
I'll shield you from the sand! I've got glasses on, we can try to make it inside!
Alright, great, but don't say get behind me, I've got a thing about that.
Okay. But seriously dude, if you like these chicks, yah gotta check out Burning Man, it's like Sodom and Gomorrah. It's all glitter and body paint, no one wears clothes!
Lucy, nothing in the book is meant to be taken literally.
But it is literal! It's about me and you, and things we've done together.
Right, but it's not meant to be taken literally.
You changed one letter in my name.
Yes, her name is Lacy, and she's tall and thin which you are not.
Are you trying to hurt me?
Of course not, why would I do that, I love you.
Aww.
You are welcome.
I mean, since Terry, I've never seen more of you. You've been here like every day for like two weeks.
Well, I'm, that's because I...
I personally think he's replacing you. I mean, didn't you used to have a job?
What? That's ridiculous, Lucy. You're just bitter that your boyfriend wrote a bestseller about you and then dumped you.
It's an allegory. And he didn't dump me. He's just been busy with casting, and the film, and scouting locations.
See, isn't it perfect? It's so corny and stupid and inauthentic. I mean, you can't fake this!
Jesús, hey I've done a little bit of acting here and there, and I would love to play myself in your movie, if I could. I mean, you're gonna shoot here, I'm gonna be here.
No can do. Your part is gonna be CG.
CG, that sucks.
Well you can be an extra, how bout that?
Okay.
I'll talk to Budget, maybe we can get you a line.
I gotta tell ya, this is not just any event. Imagine the most amazing dance party, slash orgy, slash political summit on the planet.
Okay, I'm imagining that.
Did you see Eyes Wide Shut?
Yes, I did see that.
It's like that, but Alan Greenspan will be there. And Bono.
Um, I'm just going to a thing for my Dad. Some political thing. Boring. What are you doing?
Oh nothing, uh, just some gig, uh, a bar mitzvah. It's not an orgy.
What? Did you just say it's not an orgy? That's so weird why would you say that? Why would you explicitly say it's not an orgy?
Uh, I'm losing you Luce.
It's not the kind of thing that comes up every day.
No, I can't hear you, what you just said. I'm gonna call you later.
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Lucy, the Daughter of the Devil · 75 quotes
