Maze quotes from Lucifer

Maze

Come on, you can't say this isn't the best sex you've ever had. Well, it is the only sex you've ever had, but still.

Maze

Come on. Let Mazikeen Smith buy you a drink. Maybe I'll devour your soul or something.

Maze

I know the only thing that matters to you more than Chloe—you. Easiest way to spin you around is to delve into those daddy issues. "I can't get rid of my wings! Daddy's controlling me! Wah wah wah."

Maze

But if you insist on continuing this exploration, maybe next time, I won't be around to save your ass.

Lucifer

Well, that is a shame. 'Cause you and my backside used to get on very well. My front side as well, actually.

And your name?

Maze

"Mazikeen".

How do you spell that?

Maze

Surprise me.

Trixie

Is Lucifer here?

Maze

Who are you supposed to be?

Trixie

I'm Trixie, his friend.

Maze

His friends get worse and worse.

Maze

I made a friend today.

Linda

That's fantastic news. Who?

Maze

An eight-year-old girl who wandered into the bar.

Linda

Well... that's a start. Perhaps the next one can be of legal drinking age.

Maze

You can't be mad at me forever.

Lucifer

Oh, but I can. It's one of the luxuries of being the Devil.

Chloe

Where have you been?

Lucifer

Ah, you know me—busy, busy, No rest for the wicked.

Chloe

Right. 'Cause deviant foreplay is so time-consuming.

Maze

Want to watch?

Maze

You want me to babysit?

Lucifer

Well, "my mum in the body of a disturbingly hot woman"-sit, but yes, for now.

Charlotte

Mazikeen, what is this strange gooey substance that this boy is cooing about?

Maze

You watching porn?

Lucifer

I mean, how far can a celestial being trapped in a feeble human body for the first time get?

Maze

Well, let's see. She's stupid hot, wearing my clothes, and she's got a corporate credit card.

Lucifer

…bollocks.

Maze

And how's that human husband?

Charlotte

I discovered a trick with him. Whenever he asks a question, I have sex with him. Seems to render him mute.

Maze

Hmm. Took me a while to figure that one out.

Chloe

How'd you get in here?

Maze

Let's just say Samantha at the front desk is no longer into men.

Chloe

You're a very, very deranged person.

Maze

Thanks.