[Jade rides into the expo on a scooter]
Jade, how did you get in here?
Security's lousy.
S2 E14The Mother of All Battles
[as Uncle and Mama Tohru enter the backroom]
Uncle!
Mommy!
YTYokanawa Thug 1
Hey! I said "front door" and to come alone!
I told her! [to Mama Tohru] See?! I told you!
MTMama Tohru
Nyah! Would have lost your way! Near-sighted mule can barely see hook nose in front of his face!
Eyesight good enough to see the hair growing out of that mole!
MTMama Tohru
That is a beauty mark!
YCYokanawa Crime Boss
Quit the squabbling, and put the fish on the table!
YTYokanawa Thug 1
Uhh, boss, technically an octopus is a member of the multipod family, and- [is given a look by his boss] Put the fish on the table!
S2 E15Danger in the Deep Freeze
[examining the frozen humanoid] Look at his expression. I wonder what was going through his mind.
...Look out behind you.
Yes! Perhaps!
No, I mean look out behind you! [Jackie turns to see armed inuits]
[showing the frozen humanoid a magazine] ...And this is a tree. They had those back in your day too, just not locally. And these are snow tires!
[catching Jackie] Need to work on your sneaking around. Inuits can hear footsteps in snow a mile away.
That so?
Uncle, Jade! I told you to- [Elder beckons at him with a spear] We are not armed!
But that doesn't mean we won't go polar on your butt if you don't hand over Dwayne!
Jade, please. She means the prehistoric cave creature.
No such creature here.
Oh, so maybe your sister has big feet? [indicating the creature's large footprint in the snow]
[defensive] My sister has tiny feet! She is delicate like a bird!
He's no Shaman! That is Peter Bailey, a black marketeer! He steals artifacts and sells them to the highest bidder!
But the Shaman has great powers! He can speak to other shamans across the sea through a magical black box!
[retrieves cell phone from Jackie's pocket] You mean like this? It's called a cell phone, hello? Everybody's got one back where we come from, except for me! [calls the Antique Store]
SVUncle's Voicemail
Uncle's Antique! Not here! Call back!
You fish?
What do you think? I go to a drive through burger place?
[in a challenge of Ice Fishing with Uncle, holding up his bait] My secret.
Anchovy? Bah! That's nothing but minnows.
What do you fish with, worms?
[holds up a roll of beans] Mung beans wrapped in tea leaves. Fish take a number to get on hook!
Ehhh, big talk no action. [the drop their lines into the water, and almost immediately get a bite] See? I got something!
So does Uncle! Big something!
[both withdraw their tangled lines, with no fish, Uncle's bait is gone]
Hah! See? My bait gone, yours still on hook!
So what?
So fish we lost was mine!
No that was my fish!
My fish!
You're a liar!
My fish!
You cheated!
S2 E16Into the Mouth of Evil
[examining Jackie's mouth] Well, I'm afraid you're gonna need a complete jaw transplant, Mr. Chan.
Huh?!
[laughing] Just kidding! You simply have a displaced filling, we'll have you fixed up in no time. Lisa, prepare a shot of novocaine please.
Uh... I don't like needles.
Oh, well I could drill without numbing you. [brandishes a dental drill]
[intimidated] Okay... numb me, please.
His mouth's still numb from the dentist. He said, "If the school sends any homework, it's a mistake. Just toss it."
MMohajah
I must move closer. Read his mind...
[numb speaking] Here is your ticket, Jade.
It's so cool you're taking me along on this once in a lifetime educational experience, Uncle Jackie!
[Mohajah reads her mind]
JSJade's Mind
Three whole days, no school! Yes!
[numb speaking; hugging Uncle] I'll miss you Uncle.
[Mohajah reads his mind]
JSJackie's Mind
I'll miss you Uncle.
[numb speaking] And don't worry, I won't forget the curry powder.
You are a good nephew.
[Mohajah reads his mind]
Uncle's Mind Jackie will forget. He always forgets!
[seeing Jackie with Martindale; whispers] Go, Jackie.
Jade, return to the hotel room! [runs off]
Didn't say, "Please".
[Jackie is thrown into a market booth; his cellphone rings]
Hello?
Ah, Jackie! Do not forget curry powder!
Okay Uncle, I took care of it. Have to go, bye! [Leaps up; to shopkeeper] Sorry about your shop, send me a bill, thank you! [Runs off]
[waking up tied to a chair] Jumba? Ms. Martindale? Dr. Weber? I don't understand!
JJumba
Oh you will in a moment.
A little novocaine to ease the pain?
[brandishing his dental drill] Don't bother, Portia. Mr. Chan hates needles.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Jackie Chan Adventures pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.