Riley Matthews quotes from Girl Meets World

Lucas Friar

Thank you for the video. That wasn't what I expected to see.

Riley Matthews

No more going home for the weekends?

Lucas Friar

[pause] I am home.

Riley Matthews

Well, another year we're not going to be cheerleaders.

Maya Hart

Why do you make me do these things? Pom-poms are stupid and pyramids made of humans freak me out. [pointing to her legs] And what are these?

Riley Matthews

These are your legs.

Maya Hart

Have you ever seen anything so white?

Riley Matthews

One time, when I looked into the sun.

Topanga Matthews

Okay, look, Riley, your father and I gave you a 7:00 curfew because we knew that even when you got all rebellious you'd still be home by 7:30.

Maya Hart

What?

Riley Matthews

[embarrassed] Yeah.

Topanga Matthews

So when you come in here at 7:07 acting all dangerous, it's hard... [cracks up] I'm sorry. I can't even keep a straight face.

Riley Matthews

What are you laughing at? I'm outta control!

Cory Matthews

Maya, you couldn't keep her out any later than that? I mean, what kind of bad influence are you?

Maya Hart

You're right. I gotta up my game.

Riley Matthews

"Hi, I'm Riley Matthews, and these are your John Quincy Adams middle school morning announcements."

Cory Matthews

Why are you even rehearsing?

Riley Matthews

I'm going to get it perfect this time.

Cory Matthews

And you're on.

Riley Matthews

"Hewo, I'm Miley Flatshoes and these are your flurning amousenits. Today's lunch in the cafamatorium will be hot males."

Cory Matthews

"Hot tamales", I'm hoping.

Riley Matthews

Do you remember your first date with Dad?

Topanga Matthews

Aw. We were two years old, we played in the playground. No, we were eight, and we caught fireflies. No, we were in sixth grade and we kissed against the lockers. No, we threw socks into a laundry basket. No, we fell into a llama pen at the zoo. No... that was his first date with Shawn.

Riley Matthews

So you're feeling better about my Uncle Josh?

Maya Hart

No, that's just another lump of coal I'll bury deep in my dungeon of sadness, next to my daddy issues and ballerina dreams.

Topanga Matthews

Maya, I didn't know that you dreamed of being a ballerina.

Maya Hart

I don't. I dream of ballerinas kicking me with their point toes while they're stabbing me in the face with their bun heads.

Topanga Matthews

Oh. Well, you look great.

Riley Matthews

You got any money?

Maya Hart

I never have any money.

Riley Matthews

How do we make money immediately?

Maya Hart

What we need is a Bat Mitzvah!

Riley Matthews

Are there any special requirements?

Maya Hart

Yeah, and I'm thinking it's gonna need to be you.

Topanga Matthews

Get out! You guys have been sitting in that window all day. You know what's great about a window? There's a world outside. Go there.

Maya Hart

(looks out the window) It looks fakey.

Topanga Matthews

Get out of my house!

Riley Matthews

Why don't I get a Bat Mitzvah?

Topanga Matthews

What's your Hebrew name?

Riley Matthews

Riley Matthews.

Topanga Matthews

There you go. What do you want a Bat Mitzvah for?

Riley Matthews

There comes a time in a young woman's life when she just wants to sit in a room and open envelopes.

Topanga Matthews

Riley, do you even know what this holy rite of passage is about?

Riley Matthews

Yes. This holy rite of passage is about 12 hours before you open the envelopes.

Topanga Matthews

What do you need money for?

Riley Matthews

Buy stuff.

Topanga Matthews

Specifically

Riley Matthews

Buy stuff for me-e-e-e.

Topanga Matthews

Money needs to be worked for. It's pretty hard to come up with a scheme when all you've got is the clothes on your back, isn't it?

(Looks at each other and nods)

Maya Hart

We've lost.

Riley Matthews

She beat us.

Maya Hart

We got crushed.

Riley Matthews

I don't like it very much.

Maya Hart

Have I let you down?

Riley Matthews

No, Peaches. How could you ever let me down?

Maya Hart

What kind of bad influence am I on you if I let another bad influence be a better bad influence than me in your eyes?

Riley Matthews

Hey. I will never have a better worse influence than you.

Maya Hart

Thanks. You will always be my favorite chump.

Riley Matthews

Thanks. Would I still be your favorite even if I wasn't a chump?

Maya Hart

You will always be my favorite, no matter what you are.

Riley Matthews

Okay, good. Because I may have to not be a chump for a minute.

Maya Hart

But then you will again?

Riley Matthews

I know you secretly like it.

Maya Hart

I do.

Auggie Matthews

Uncle Eric, how come you look like this?

Cory Matthews

Because they elected him mayor.

Riley Matthews

Who would do that?

Topanga Matthews

The good people of Stupidtown.

Eric Matthews

It's not pronounced Stupidtown!

Topanga Matthews

How is it pronounced?

Eric Matthews

St. Upidtown!

Topanga Matthews

Oh. How St. Upid of me.

Eric Matthews

Now, which one of you is Riley's friend Malisha?

Maya Hart

It's Maya.

Eric Matthews

Oh, okay. So, what are you fighting about?

Maya Hart

She didn't take my side.

Riley Matthews

I couldn't take her side based on what was said, which is the problem with this whole thing, 'cause Maya is making too big of a deal of what was said.

Eric Matthews

Uh-huh. Okay. Okay. Now, which one was she?

Riley Matthews

You can't do this. Your conscience will always bother you.

Maya Hart

I don't have a conscience.

Riley Matthews

Everybody does. And until yours shows up, I'm going with you.

Cory Matthews

What is a lie? What are the effects of a lie on the human soul?

Riley Matthews

Why are you looking at me?

Cory Matthews

The man who summed up the price of a lie was Edgar Allan Poe in "The Tell-Tale Heart". Farkle?

So this guy chops somebody up, hides him in the floor. He's cool for awhile, but all of a sudden, boom, boom. Boom, boom. Boom, boom! His guilty conscience made him hear the heartbeat under the floorboards. So, he gave himself up. Some people just ain't cut out for this stuff.

Farkle Minkus

He called on me, you know.

I know stuff. I know a lot of stuff. I know stuff about you.

Farkle Minkus

You don't know anything about me.

Boom, boom.

Farkle Minkus

Why would you do that?

Boom, boom.

Farkle Minkus

I don't understand.

Boom, boom!

Farkle Minkus

[panicked] All through kindergarten, I never fell asleep once! I was faking all my naps! Faking them. I can't do it. I don't know how Maya can just fall asleep anywhere!

Lucas Friar

Why don't you elect people who care enough to make things better?

Cory Matthews

I like to think I do every time I vote. But the truth is, I'm not responsible for the quality of people running for office.

Riley Matthews

How are these people even chosen?

Cory Matthews

Well, the parties choose the best candidates they can come up with.

Eric Matthews

I am running for senator of the great state of New York, and I need your votes!

Riley Matthews

Kids don't vote.

Eric Matthews

Then, aww.

Cory Matthews

Everybody close your books, it's the end of the world.

Eric Matthews

I'm really dizzy. I've done this in every classroom!

Eric Matthews

They played me. I'm just supposed to lose.

Supposed to.

Riley Matthews

Like Kennedy was.

Maya Hart

Or Nixon.

Eric Matthews

Yeah, but those guys weren't real!

Maya Hart

Where's Garaboski?

Lucas Friar

Uh oh.

Riley Matthews

Did we do it?

Farkle Minkus

Did we finally break him?

Cory Matthews

[walks in] You broke him!

Cory Matthews

Quiet! Mr. Garaboski retired yesterday.

Cory Matthews

Quiet! The guy survives Vietnam *and* *Mrs.* Garaboski, and he can't get past you. Now, he left a letter here that expressed his feelings. "Dear you little"- okay, I can't read this.

Lucas Friar

He always talked about the good old days, before 1985.

Riley Matthews

What happened in 1985?

Farkle Minkus

That was the year the New York Board of Education said you couldn't hit a kid with a ruler.