Topanga Matthews quotes from Girl Meets World

Auggie Matthews

How's my breath? [breathes on Topanga]

Topanga Matthews

Ooh. Like flowers. How'd you do that?

Auggie Matthews

I ate your flowers.

Topanga Matthews

Wait, your dance is Friday?

Riley Matthews

You're doing that thing with your voice.

Topanga Matthews

But Friday is the last night of the Coney Island Cyclone.

Riley Matthews

But it's our first dance! And Dad takes me to ride the rollercoaster a bunch of times, right?

Topanga Matthews

Your father thinks of it as a tradition.

Riley Matthews

How bad is this?

Topanga Matthews

Your father thinks of it as the reason he wakes up in the morning.

Riley Matthews

Maybe he won't remember it this year.

Cory Matthews

[bursting through the door] Three days 'til Cyclone Day!

Topanga Matthews

When is my birthday?

Cory Matthews

148 days from Cyclone Day!

Topanga Matthews

[to Riley] Good luck to you.

Riley Matthews

Why didn't you wake me? It's electives day. The earlier we sign up, the better the chance we have of getting all the good ones.

Topanga Matthews

I tried to wake you up three times.

Riley Matthews

You know I don't think you're serious until six times.

Topanga Matthews

Okay, look, Riley, your father and I gave you a 7:00 curfew because we knew that even when you got all rebellious you'd still be home by 7:30.

Maya Hart

What?

Riley Matthews

[embarrassed] Yeah.

Topanga Matthews

So when you come in here at 7:07 acting all dangerous, it's hard... [cracks up] I'm sorry. I can't even keep a straight face.

Riley Matthews

What are you laughing at? I'm outta control!

Cory Matthews

Maya, you couldn't keep her out any later than that? I mean, what kind of bad influence are you?

Maya Hart

You're right. I gotta up my game.

Shawn Hunter

Hey, Mrs. Cory.

Topanga Matthews

Hey, Mr. Cory.

Cory Matthews

See this? "The Family Game. The game for families." Not "The Friends Game. A game for friends." I saw that game. I didn't buy that game. I bought this one. Because I used to have a family.

Topanga Matthews

Will you stop?

Cory Matthews

How could she choose her friends over us? I mean, did they burp her? Did they change her diapers?

Farkle Minkus

We haven't yet, but we will when she's old.

Topanga Matthews

Honey, hide the cake before Maya gets here.

Cory Matthews

I know, but you know what we should do? We should bring this cake to Maya's mother just in case she forgot to get her own kid a cake.

Topanga Matthews

Oh, you think that could actually happen?

Cory Matthews

Honey, I grew up with Shawn Hunter. Remember his mother? She forgot where she lived.

Topanga Matthews

Wait a minute, who let you in?

Shawn Hunter

I have a key.

Topanga Matthews

[to Cory] You gave him a key?

Cory Matthews

[to Topanga] Fine, I'll give you a key.

Topanga Matthews

Judy, I'm so glad you were able to join our little book club. Auggie is such a fan of your daughter Ava.

Oh well, who isn't? And I must say, what a surprisingly decent idea, Topanga. I think a book club is such a wonderful forum to exchange ideas and intellectual conversation.

Topanga Matthews

Judy, are you British?

No, I'm just better than everyone else.

Riley Matthews

Do you remember your first date with Dad?

Topanga Matthews

Aw. We were two years old, we played in the playground. No, we were eight, and we caught fireflies. No, we were in sixth grade and we kissed against the lockers. No, we threw socks into a laundry basket. No, we fell into a llama pen at the zoo. No... that was his first date with Shawn.

Riley Matthews

So you're feeling better about my Uncle Josh?

Maya Hart

No, that's just another lump of coal I'll bury deep in my dungeon of sadness, next to my daddy issues and ballerina dreams.

Topanga Matthews

Maya, I didn't know that you dreamed of being a ballerina.

Maya Hart

I don't. I dream of ballerinas kicking me with their point toes while they're stabbing me in the face with their bun heads.

Topanga Matthews

Oh. Well, you look great.

Riley Matthews

You got any money?

Maya Hart

I never have any money.

Riley Matthews

How do we make money immediately?

Maya Hart

What we need is a Bat Mitzvah!

Riley Matthews

Are there any special requirements?

Maya Hart

Yeah, and I'm thinking it's gonna need to be you.

Topanga Matthews

Get out! You guys have been sitting in that window all day. You know what's great about a window? There's a world outside. Go there.

Maya Hart

(looks out the window) It looks fakey.

Topanga Matthews

Get out of my house!

Riley Matthews

Why don't I get a Bat Mitzvah?

Topanga Matthews

What's your Hebrew name?

Riley Matthews

Riley Matthews.

Topanga Matthews

There you go. What do you want a Bat Mitzvah for?

Riley Matthews

There comes a time in a young woman's life when she just wants to sit in a room and open envelopes.

Topanga Matthews

Riley, do you even know what this holy rite of passage is about?

Riley Matthews

Yes. This holy rite of passage is about 12 hours before you open the envelopes.

Topanga Matthews

What do you need money for?

Riley Matthews

Buy stuff.

Topanga Matthews

Specifically

Riley Matthews

Buy stuff for me-e-e-e.

Topanga Matthews

Money needs to be worked for. It's pretty hard to come up with a scheme when all you've got is the clothes on your back, isn't it?

(Looks at each other and nods)

Auggie Matthews

Uncle Eric, how come you look like this?

Cory Matthews

Because they elected him mayor.

Riley Matthews

Who would do that?

Topanga Matthews

The good people of Stupidtown.

Eric Matthews

It's not pronounced Stupidtown!

Topanga Matthews

How is it pronounced?

Eric Matthews

St. Upidtown!

Topanga Matthews

Oh. How St. Upid of me.

Topanga Matthews

Girls, slow down! What is the rush?

Maya Hart

Dinner is keeping us from our homework.

Riley Matthews

The new English teacher wants us to read this.

Topanga Matthews

This looks like a comic book.

Cory Matthews

Yes!

Topanga Matthews

Didn't we have a teacher who taught us...

Cory Matthews

Yes!

Topanga Matthews

Tell me more about this new English teacher.

Riley Matthews

Motorcycle.

Maya Hart

Leather jacket.

Topanga Matthews

Sounds familiar... [turns to Cory] Weren't you on the committee to hire the new English teacher?

Cory Matthews

Yes!

Riley Matthews

We don't need adult supervision anymore. We're becoming wonderful young adults.

Cory Matthews

Says who?

Riley Matthews

The ghost of the bay window.

Cory Matthews

Oh, the ghost of the bay window.

Riley Matthews

When you guys go to sleep, she floats in.

Topanga Matthews

She goes, "boo." We go, "aah!"

We all laugh and discuss the way ghosts are portrayed in the media.

Riley Matthews

Are you making fun of us?

Cory Matthews

Pretty sure we are.