I'm sorry, kids. I never wanted you to know Santa was real.
“I Know What You Did Next Xmas” · Season 8, Episode 6
In this episode: Amy Wong (5), Professor Hubert Farnsworth (3), Philip J. Fry (2), Turanga Leela (2), Hermes Conrad (2), Kif Kroker (1)
Um, Professor, isn't it risky to go back in time and change history?
Oh my, yes. But I'll go alone to minimize the chance of anyone becoming their own grandfather.
These things happen.
No, they don't!
Ah, here comes the Big Backwards Bang. Ow! I'm being crushed by all the matter that ever was!
Now, hold on. Xmas isn't for a week. Until then, we've got non-stop busy work.
Oh, fuff! Let's stop pretending we do anything around here. Everyone, take the week off and be with your so-called loved ones!
Really?
I forgot I had loved ones!
It's a Human Resources miracle!
Behold, my family's traditional Yuletide feast - TurDolfin! It's fresh turtle cooked inside a fermented dolphin!
LLeo
Wow, soon it's gonna be barf inside a vomit!
Dad! Sssh! Keep the truth to yourself!
IInez
Which part smells like whale butt?
Oh, that would be the gravy!
[to Bender and Zoidberg] Merry Xmas, you guys!
We didn't know you hadn't been invited anywhere.
We came as soon as we realized what losers you are!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Futurama pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.