Frisky Dingo · Season 1
So...who's read Flowers for Algernon?
Ken!
Oooh, about the kid with all the chains, and the goggles, and at the end he gets killed with a shotgun?
Boosh
That's Harrison Bergeron.
Hollywood Squares!
That's Tom Bergeron.
Brother of Menelaus!
Damn it, that's Agamemnon!
Nearl?
"Mr. Crews" will do nicely. Although I can't say the same for that winged collar.
What are "whammies"?
Summer, 1977. Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody" was playing on Everybody's Eight-Track as the nation slept in fear of the Son-of-Sam killer [X-Tacle's Gasp], and mourned the loss of our Favourite Son, legendary rock-and-roll icon Elvis Aaron Pres-
[An X-Tacle's Head Explodes]:
Why are our heads still blowing up?
Sorry. Sat on the remote.
We should put that in a cabinet...
Yeah.
[continuing his story] And...
That your fat ass can't fit in.
Everybody! Just...Okay? And, Like Elvis, Xander Crews had...an identical twin! [X-Tacles Gasp]
A twin?
Twin Heirs, to the vast Crews Fortune, left behind by my murdered Parents. (shows them an identical photo to Xander's)
Oh my God.
[Referring to his Popcorn] Yeah, it's Cheddar.
I don't wanna go to the monkey hospital!
But Nearl wanna stay with mummy and daddy and brother Xandy!
No Xander, he's dead to us
(Starts crying)
Now; who's for Denny's?
(Instantly stops crying) Grandslam!
Oh My God I'm so friggin' sad!
Yes! Here you go. [Hands X-Tacle a tissue]
I'll take it thank you.
But life in the hospital was a Picnic compared to Life on the Mean streets of...Town...
[Flashback]:
...But I want to stay forever living in the Hospital with you Mr. Ford!
Hospital closed Nearl.
Uh Oh!
Now I gotta go and work in a damn Pet Store.
I'd like that!
[Ignoring him] And you can thank Ron Reagan's ass for that! (He drives away)
Thank you, Ronald Reagan. (Pauses to think) Your legacy is intact.
[Flashback Ends]:
But thanks to you and your mysterious brain chemical, we shall savor the sweet nectar of revenge as we rise up, as one man, and DESTROY MY BROTHER, XANDER CREW--[Ronnie shoots Nearl in the head] Thanks, Ken! [Nearl falls over]
Ronnie!
What?
What is wrong with you!?
Hey, what? I do you favor.
This is why we can't have nice things! Thank you, Ronnie!
Look this is complicated enough without all this evil twin bullsh*t having.
You know, that is... actually, that's a pretty good point.
Good for you, Ronnie.
Yeah, it's complicated.
So, if Xander Crews really is Awesome X, then where is he?
[a fellow slave has given Killface a radish]
Barnaby, tell him thank you. [Xander Crews thanks him in a foreign language] Try to make it sound a little sarcastic.
Well, a train's not an iron rooster but that's what they call it in China!
Really?
[Laughs, speaks in chinese] It's a colorful language.
Oh, that's just crazy China man talk.
Barnaby, make those words English!
I kinda think he said... death rabbits.
["Previously" on "Frisky Dingo"]
I can't believe Killface fired me. Well, revenge shall be mine.
[kicking out the painting] No! Revenge shall be mine!
I can't believe Xander Crews had a twin brother!
Yeah, until Ronnie shot him in the face.
Has anyone got a prayer?
Oh! Uh... It's more of a limerick."
There once was a dead guy named Nearl. He rode around town on a squirrel. He said to the pig... I... don't actually have one.
Fantastic.
So if I'm here... this way... oh, here's an idea, indicate north. Otherwise it's not a map. It's just a drawing.
So get this, he didn't even have a car.
Well thank God we sorted that out.
Yeah.
Now will you please come on!
Come on, no sense mopin' around here all day.
Yes, have too many sad memories here. [Knocks over Nearl's wreath.] Also is messy.
Say we...treat ourselves, go do something fun.
Ooh, let's go to the illegal underground Chinese rabbit fights!
Oh...my...god!
What?
Let's get there this instant!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Frisky Dingo pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
