Andy Brown quotes from Everwood

Dad, can I wear this shirt?

Andy

Sure. Why not?

I can't remember if I wore it yesterday.

Andy

I don't think it matters in fourth grade, honey.

Ephram

I guess that's the one advantage of having a father who has no idea what's going on. He's too clueless to become one of the pod-parents.

Andy

Ephram! Hey Ephram! Come on down -- Duke's giving away frisbees.

Ephram

Oh God. He's become one of them.

Amy

Welcome.

Harold

Ask any parent and they'll tell you their child is incredibly brilliant. One in a million of those parents might be right. Just try telling that to the other couple hundred thousand.

Andy

[After his cellphone rings to the I Dream of Jeanie theme] You know, that ring takes all the authority out of what you just said.

Andy

That was fatherly advice, wasn't it?

Ephram

Not bad.

Andy

See, I really am getting better.

Ephram

Hey, Dad. One more thing... can I go to a frat party tonight?

Andy

A frat party?

Ephram

Yes, there's going to be drinking, drugs, unprotected sex. I'll probably be the youngest person there. Besides, I don't want to go. I have to.

Andy

Why?

Ephram

Because you just said that if I know something, I have to do something about it.

Andy

And so having said that, I'm all but forced to let you go to a party I never would have agreed to prior. Maybe you're getting better at this.

Andy

I think I am a pretty good judge of people.

Ephram

Yeah? Like that maid you hired back in Manhattan that stole all the silverware?

Andy

You were right, I was wrong.

Linda

It must have caused you some physical pain for you to utter that sentence.

Andy

Just some internal bleeding.

Andy

Hey.

Linda

This has to stop.

Andy

So you got the balloons?

Linda

I did, but I don't want them and I don't want the flowers either. Do you understand?

Andy

Not a big fan of presents. Got it.

Linda

No, it's not the presents. It's you Andy. I'm not interested in you. I'm sorry, I was hoping that we didn't have to have this whole conversation, but obviously we do. The thing is, ummm, I'm-I'm not attracted to you and I'm sorry if I gave you the wrong impression, but I don't want to date you and I don't parse anything romantic happening between us.

Andy

Oh.

Linda

I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. I just, I-I didn't know how else to put it. So, it just has to stop, okay?

Andy

Sure. Okay.

Ephram

What I want is to be able to have a life, and I wouldn't even mind having to share it with you. But you won't let that happen. You're too busy controlling everything and everyone, that I don't even think you know what you're controlling anymore. What is so wrong with me and Madison?

Andy

Many, many things.

Ephram

No there's not. I know the age thing freaks you out, but there's more to it than that, I can tell. I just can't figure out what it could be. She's great. She's smart. She loves Delia and she even likes you. What is it that you're trying to stop?

Andy

It's just wrong.

I'm not mad at you Dad, I just don't want her to be mad at me.

Andy

Well honey, Linda's not going to be mad at you.

Not Linda--Mom.

Andy

What about Mom?

If I like Linda, Mom will know and she'll be mad.

Andy

Why would Mom be mad?

Because she'll be jealous. You think Linda's beautiful. She's got red hair and she's a doctor, and Mom wasn't like that.

Andy

Honey, there will never be anyone who means as much to me as Mom did. Not anyone. Just like no one could ever take your place or Ephram's. That's the first thing you have to know.

What's the second?

Andy

The second thing is that Mom would never be mad at you or me or anyone for liking someone else that wasn't her.

I don't know, she'd be pretty tough.

Andy

Delia, when someone we love dies, it's okay to be sad about it for awhile. For as long as you need to be really. But you-you, just can't hang on to all the love that you used to give to that person.

Why not?

Andy

Because--love's not worth a whole lot if you just keep it to yourself.

Andy

Why aren't you with Madison?

Ephram

Would you believe we decided our relationship was strong enough that we don't have to spend every waking moment together?

Andy

No.

Ephram

Then I think we're in a fight.

Andy

I know I'm the last person you want advice from right now, but don't be afraid to make sure that everything's right. You're never going to get this moment back.

Amy

I appreciate what you're saying, Dr. Brown, but... I had the right person in my life, and unfortunately, we ran out of time.

Andy

[about Madison] Are you sleeping with her? Answer me!

Ephram

No, I'm not sleeping with her. I'm not sleeping with her and I'm gonna be a virgin for the rest of my life, because that's just how my life is! When something is good, it turns bad, and when something's bad it just gets worse. Is that what you wanted to hear?

Andy

[to Ephram] I have your report card.

Run for it!

Andy

I'm sorry if I have to put my foot down, but I should have done this six months ago. I knew how this was going to end back then. I told you both. I wish someone had listened to me.

Ephram

What do you mean, "someone"? Did you talk to Madison behind my back?