Original El Tigre quotes from El Tigre: The Adventures of Manny Rivera

General Chapuza

So, zombies cannot dance, eh? [all the zombies complain offensively] Now, El Tigre… We will show you the error of your ways.

[amazed] Woo-hoo! Man, I was totally wrong about you guys! That was awesome!

Check out what's at the museum… The Golden Mustache of the Pharaohs. The Mustache Mafia are totally gonna… [notices Frida looking really sad and upset] Hey, what's wrong?

Frida

Nothing. It's just… lying to my dad like this…

Oh, you feeling a little guilty?

Frida

No, of course not. Guilty, me? [laughs] I laugh. Guilt slides off me like water off a duck's back. A filthy, stinking, no-good duck who lies to her dad!

Wait a minute!

Emiliano

You stay out of this, Rivera! She lied to me.

Yeah, she lied… but only 'cause she wanted to be a good cadet so you'd like her more.

Emiliano

What?! How could I like her more?! I love my Frida. She is… my Frida.

Manny, as your father, it is my job to keep you safe. I'm afraid I must forbid you to fight giant robots!

Aw, Dad, just one more?

Adios, Giant Robot Sanchez! [gives Robot Sanchez a mighty punch]

BO-BO-BEEP.

Now clean up this mess! And when you get home, we will have our 700 talk about crime-fighting safety, but LOUDER this time! [walks away]

[frustrated] Why is he always so worried about my safety when I never even think about it?

Aw, man. We totally broke their dad!

Frida

No, you broke their dad, I wrecked the puppy hospital.

Stall. I work on the door.

It's weird. I kinda understand why my dad acts all... daddish.

Frida

Understand: yes. Like: no. [sees that they're flying towards back to Miracle City] Hey, look, the Miracle City volcano!

[wounded] Oh, good...

Mom, are you okay? [points to the glove] Get your hand off my mom!

Maria

Manny, it's not what you think.

Maria, you said the glove was destroyed in the jaws of the Robasura.

Maria

I thought it was. [Flashback to the events of "A Mother's Glove", when the glove lands in the Robasura and gets crushed by its jaws after its battle with Manny; voice-over] But a few days later, it showed up on my doorstep, hurt and scared. I just couldn't turn it away. As I nursed it back to health, I realized the glove was good inside. Tests in my home lab showed that if I wore the glove for only one hour at a time, I could control the danger mania. Even a few seconds more, and I become… unstable. So, the glove and I made a deal. [Flashback ends] I will use my Plata Peligrosa powers to help those in need, but when my watch alarm sounds, it must get off my hand. Right, "Glovey?"

That's great, Mom.

Frida

You have a home lab?

Maria

Now, I can help my boys out in a crisis.

[gazing dreamily at her] You called me handsome.

Maria

Rodolfo, don't listen to what I say when I'm wearing the glove. I'm not myself. [Rodolfo puckers up his lips to kiss her; puts her hand on his mouth] You and I always be just friends.

Of course. I understand completely. [Maria walks off] She called me handsome!

Frida

Wow, your mom and dad, a crime-fighting team. Maybe they'll get back together. [imitates kissing while rubbing Señor Chapi's head] Oh, Rodolfo, you're so handsome.

[touched while blushing] Ah, viva pantalones.

Manny

Cut it out, Frida. We both know my parents are better off apart.

Frida

Yeah, but does your dad know?

Manny

Sure he does. Probably. Down deep. Anyway, as long as he keeps his mind off beautifying the city.

[giving Frida the alarm watch] (Here,) Hide this.

Frida

But without the alarm, your mom's gonna go all danger-crazy.

Exactly.

What's that noise?

Wind.

Frida

Elephants.

Airplane.

Frida

Thingy-thing.

[looks up and gasps] Maria! [Maria's eyes light up in flames and she suddenly goes completely insane with danger and beats up the monsters, violently; utterly shocked] I have never seen so much grotesque grotesquely. That's not like Maria. It's not love!

[grabs Rodolfo by the collar] You and I belong together, White Pantera! Come on. Spend your life with me, crushing evil, and laughing in danger, and never taking this glove off! [laughs wickedly insane]

This is my chance to show those girls how macho I am for real! [Makes a girly face and claps] Yay!

Frida

Yeah…he's gonna need a macho coach.

[showing up at the Miracle City junkyard; annoyed] Frida! Missed you at the concert tonight.

Frida

Oh, was that tonight?

Guess you couldn't make it 'cause you were too busy STABBING ME IN THE BACK!

Frida

I didn't stab you anywhere.

How could you?! You haven't seen me all week!

Frida

Sure, I have.

Oh, yeah? What did I bring to school for lunch yesterday?

Frida

FOOD!

Lucky guess.

Frida

You're just mad because for once, I'm not your sidekick.

[angrily gets in her face] Yeah. You're his sidekick!

Frida

Nuh-uh, I'm like, his, "front-kick!"

[drags her away and gets into Manny's face] Get out of her face.

Make me, tin puppy!

Make me make you.

Make me make you make me!

Here… [hands Frida his whip] Finish him.

Frida

[incredulous] What?

It's time for you to choose, Frida… El Tigre or me?

Frida

[nonchalantly] El Tigre. [takes off her biker helmet]

Yes, though it may be agonizing you must decide between… what?

Frida

El Tigre, duh, no brainer.

You can't DO that!

Frida

Can, did.

You were supposed to forget about him! [in a grown man's voice as his body becomes full silver] This is not going according to my secret plan!

[shocked] I know that voice! Silver Wolf is…

[revealing himself in the form of Silver Wolf] The Titanium Titan!

Frida

[disgusted] Eww, I still have his spit on my cheek.

Curse you, Frida! You have foiled my plan to get revenge on El Tigre for stealing White Pantera from me for stealing you from El Tigre!

You understand any of that?

Frida

What's foiled mean?

Now, El Tigre, you will lose the hard way!

Black Cuervo

All right, yes! I am Zoe Aves. You have learned the truth. But maybe sharing my secret will bring us closer. Maybe you will join me, and maybe I will give you... a jet pack. All you have to do is keep my secret.

[romantically] Oh, a jet pack. We can be together at last, mi amor.

Rodolfo

Manny, I must speak to you, now. [drags him into his room] I arrange for you to meet the Golden Eagle Twins, and you drop a stolen churro truck on them?!

What truck? And it's not my fault.

Rodolfo

[sighs] No, mijo, it isn't. It's my fault. I have been a poor role model. [sniffs sadly] I have failed you. [starts sobbing]

No, Dad, you're the best. But if it'll make you better, I'll hang out with the twins.

Rodolfo

I can always count on you, mijo. Now let's go share the good news.