Frida Suárez quotes from El Tigre: The Adventures of Manny Rivera

Frida

He saved us all from the evil guacamole!

Rodolfo

Thank you, Man- wait, what evil guacamole?

Frida

Duh. The free stuff we got from that creepy old lady so Manny could use your money to buy the tattoo maker. [realized what she said; disappointed] Dang!

Rodolfo

Manuel Pablo Gutierrez O'Brian Equihua Rivera, what is going on here?!

Frida

We can explain everything. See, there were these aliens, and then they grabbed my face…

[sighs with guilt] No, Frida. It's time to tell the truth. [45 minutes later…] And worst of all, I made you guys miss the big game.

Rodolfo

So, you stole money from me and you lied. But, you also risked your life to save us and then told the truth. [thinks for a second] Let's see, what would be an appropriate punishment?

Manny

[as Frida and Zoe both glare angrily at each other] What? You still mad at her?

Frida

[turns to Manny] Duh! Remember the finger-paint thing? [Flashback to Kindergarten where she is carrying some paint before Zoe purposely trips her, causing her to fly across the room, screaming; two paint cans tip her goggles and one entirely covers her in green paint, and she cries, scaring the other kids away] And the "kick-me" thing? [Another flashback to where she dodges Zoe and she slaps a piece of paper reading, "Kick me", behind her back as she walks into the Karate room, unnoticed, and a riot is heard from the other side; Final flashback shows her tapping on her locker and a bear pops out and attacks her] And the savage bear attack thing?!

Manny

Ah, you gotta let that stuff go, Frida.

Frida

Also, she once told everyone at school you had a perm.

Manny

[gasps in shock, then viciously enraged] SHE MUST PAY! [on the last word with a fiery background]

Frida

Forget about Zoe. We got party prep to do.

[whispering from outside Frida's house] Frida!

Frida

[wakes up and gets up from her bed to the window; whispering] Where have you been?!

I'm only six hours late.

Frida

You're two days and six hours late! The party is tomorrow. Now go home! [turns off the lights and goes back to sleep]

Frida? Frida? [shouting] FRIDA!

Emiliano

El Tigre! My daughter may NOT receive visitors after 8 P.M.!

Manny

Uh, Frida? I brought you the piñata.

Frida

You did? Oh, Manny, I knew… [shocked to see Manny's poorly made piñata] This is my awesome birthday piñata?

Manny

Ye…abe?

Frida

Pretzels and a dirty sock?!

Manny

It still needs some fine-tuning.

Frida

Where have you been the last two days?! What kind of piñata is this?! WHAT'S THE SQUARE ROOT OF NINE?!

Manny

[confused] Square root?

Frida

I need help with my math homework, which you would know if you were any kind of friend!

Manny

If you were any kind of friend, you'd know… [takes off his eye patch and throws it on the ground, angrily] I STINK AT MATH!

Frida

You just plain STINK!

You gonna take that, Manny?

Manny

Hey, if you're such a great friend, why'd I make you such a lousy piñata?

Frida

Well, since you're no kind of friend, you… you're… UNINVITED to my party! [gasps as she covers her mouth]

[seeing Frida wearing the belt buckle he made for her as an early birthday present] You're wearing the belt buckle?

Frida

My best friend made it for me.

Manny

[searching through the garbage can] Oooh! A broken yo-yo! Buffalo jerky! [gasps] And two doorknobs.

Frida

Behold! Perfectly good roller skates made from household garbage.

Manny

It's like my dad says, [imitating Rodolfo] "You don't need money to have fun."

Frida

I even made a safety gear.

Manny

Now all we need is another pair of skates.

Frida

Pssh. We don't need anything!

Manny

This is gonna be awesome if we survive.

And on the right of the plane, you can see Manny and Frida about to do something stupid.

Manny

So, all that work really paid off.

Frida

Your dad was totally wrong. You do need money to have fun. LuxeBlades, reverse somersault!

Manny

LuxeBlades, give a beat, low rider style.

Manny

[playing a video game system while riding the Luxe Scooter] This video game is so realistic!

Frida

Yeah, they totally got my goggles right.

Manny

Luxe Scooters! Could anything be better?

Something is better. Changing course to nearest "Luxeteria." [Manny and Frida's Luxe Scooters change courses to the nearest Luxe shop and inside is an even newer product] Behold, the LuxePod.

[amazed] Ooh!

The LuxePod. A self-contained leisure, relaxation, and entertainment environment.

Manny

It has video games from the future!

Frida

It has a built-in toilet!

Manny

Where are we gonna get the money? We've found, stolen, and returned every pet in Miracle City.

Frida

There's got to be a way to get it, 'cause we've gotta get Luxepods! [looks at the missing poster of Taco as the winds unfolds it, revealing the price from $100 to $100,000] Santa Claus!

Manny

Okay, that's enough money. We are going to Calavera! [changes into El Tigre]

You like a hot dog, señor?

The only dog I'm looking for is a taco.

We're all looking for a taco, compadre. And I think we're hungrier than you.

Manny

I think we did the right thing. Like my dad says, [imitating Rodolfo] "You don't need money to have fun."

Frida

And check it out, I still have these. [takes out the household garbage-made roller skates she kept]

Manny

This is gonna be awesome if we survive!

Grandpapi

Back in my day, Miracle City won every trophy imaginable. Except for the League Championship.

Frida

And we're not gonna win it this year with no-cheaty-petey coaching us.

Grandpapi

Then I will not have my revenge on General Chapuza. Oh, well. Nothing we can do about it, sí?

Manny

I am here to help. I am here to help.

Frida

Dude, that's starting to creep me out.

[talking to Aaron; sweetly] Aaron, you haven't done your homework in weeks. [sternly] This is it! Turn in your assignment tomorrow, or you will be EXPELLED!!!

No more school? Wow, thanks.

[serious] Young man, you need help.

Class, not only did Aaron do his homework, [chuckles] he got a perfect score on today's pop quiz! [places a gold star on Aaron's forehead]

This one's for you, Manny! Thanks for helping.

Frida

You did a good thing, dude. [gives Manny a thumbs up]

Frida

Manny, you can't force people to change. But you're not doing it to me, so who cares, right? All right, let's get going.

Going?

Frida

Yeah, me and the Atomic Sombreros are doing a lunch concert, remember?

This band thing is going nowhere, Frida. You need to give it up and learn something practical, like how to tap dance!

Frida

[gasps in shock] Give up my band?! Wait, now you are doing it to me!

[shaking irately] I said… LEARN TO TAP DANCE! [smiles and leaves]

Somebody should really do something about that guy, huh?

Frida

Yeah. Somebody should. [later in a closet, she assembles all the students for a meeting] People, I want Help-zilla out, and the old Manny back. And Sergio here has an idea how we can do it.

[stepping in] I believe I know someone who can help. Someone who can… show El Tigre the error of his ways.

Frida

Like a counselor, right?

[laughs] Yes. A counselor. [starts laughing maniacally] Uh, I, uh, I just remembered a joke.

[examining his statue] Man, I look good.

You look like a BULLY!

[turns around, seeing Frida and all the other students angrily facing him] Frida? What is this?

Frida

[sternly] Manny, there's someone I want you to talk to. Where's Sergio's friend?

[drops down in front] Here!

Frida

Ooh, this may have been a mistake.

It's over, pardner! No more bullying these fine-a folks!

Bullying them? I was helping them. Right, guys? [the other students tear down his statue] I thought I was doing good.

Frida

Pst.

Manny

You would say that.

Frida

I swear I didn't mean for this to happen, Manny. You've gotta help us.

Manny

I was helping. How could you do this to me? Don't you know you can't force people to change?

Frida

Yeah, I know that. Do you?

Manny

Of course, I- [realizes] Oh… This, this is all my fault.

Frida

Yep.

Manny

I need my belt.