[Megan is in Drake and Josh's room fixing the thermostat]
[voiceover] Where are you?
Um. Hang on. I'm in Drake and Josh's room.
There you are. Don't you want dinner? I ordered Chinese.
Uh, what are you doing in the boys' room?
Oh, I just wanted to clean up a little, make sure everything's nice for Josh when he gets home from the hospital.
You know, I don't think Josh has any idea how lucky he is to have a little sister like you.
It's ok. His happiness is my reward.
[as Audrey leaves Drake and Josh's room, Megan continues fixing the thermostat]
CDr. Carlson
Yes well, I was just coming to talk to you about that. Until I ran into somebody out in the elevator.
[Dr. Nussbaum enters from behind him]
CDr. Carlson
This is Dr. Nussbaum.
[points at Drake] You mean he's an impostor?!?
CDr. Carlson
It would appear so. [Drake looks at Josh for ideas, only for him to shrug in response, two police officers enter from behind the curtain] Are you aware, that you can go to prison for impersonating a doctor?
[as the group closes in, Drake quickly jumps out the window, roughly landing in a shrub]
[jumps out the window] Ow!
[at the end, Drake and Josh arrive home from the hospital and discover that their room has turned cold by Megan]
I cannot believe you jumped out that window.
I can't believe I broke my arm.
Yeah, but at least you don't have to worry about. [starts feeling cold] Uhh! Ok. Is it like really cold in here?
It must be like 30 degrees.
[comes in Drake and Josh's room] 31 Degrees and dropping.
Alright, Megan. What'd you do?
I just modified the air conditioning in your room. You guys did say you like it cold, right?
So if you thought this was gonna upset us, too bad!
Good. Enjoy the weather. Boobs. [leaves Drake and Josh's room]
Well, it looks like we foiled her little plan.
Yeah, so she made the room a little cold. Like we care.
[while Drake and Josh are watching TV, they begin to feel snow in their room as snow falls from the ceiling as the episode ends]
[during the end credits, Drake picks up Josh from the floor who got his foot injured and tries to take him to the hospital]
Aw, here, come on, man. Let me take you to the hospital.
Come on. You said it was broken.
Ow! I'm not going to an hospital. Look, I'm sure it's just a bruise.
Man, I don't know what happened. I just shoved the potato in here but it wasn't supposed to go off until I pressed the- [Josh angrily throws Drake's toy gun out the window]
[Flashback #1: in Josh's fake recollection]
[acting like a bully] Hey.
I'm Josh, what's your name?
I'm gonna buy a foam finger.
Um, could you not talk to me?
Ha-ha! You're funny. Wanna be friends?
If I say yes, will you stop talking to me?
Um, pardon me, but I think you're next in line.
Yeah, I know. Hey girls! Why don't you cut in line you can all buy foam fingers?!
[A group of little girls whoop while cutting and get in line to buy all the foam fingers]
Hey, no cutsies! Um, I was in line! [the little girls leave after buying almost all of the foam fingers] Ladies!
Got any foam fingers left?
[satisfied] Good. I'll buy it. So he can't have it!
Here you go, the last foam finger.
[satisfied] Ha-ha! I got the last foam finger!
Daddy! [Young Drake hits him] You thumped me!
[Young Drake tackles Young Josh, causing a fight for the last foam finger]
[They continue fighting until the cops show up as Josh's recollection ends]
And then the cops had to come break it up!
[Flashback #2: in Drake's fake recollection]
[complaining] Hey! What the heck is taking so long?
Oh, don't worry. The line's moving pretty fast.
[complaining] Who asked you?
He said next in line. Get your butt out of your ears!
LBLittle British Girl
[walks up to Drake and Josh] Pardon me sir. I have only 3 weeks to live. May I please cut in front of you? Every minute counts.
[complaining] Ah! For the love of crud!
[Lenny gives a little British girl a foam finger much to Young Drake's delight]
LBLittle British Girl
You're very kind. [leaves]
Uh, 1 foam finger please.
O-kay, it looks like that you got the last one.
[complaining] The last one?!
You're dead, punk! [begins fighting with Young Drake causing a fight for the last foam finger]
[They continue fighting until the cops show up to stop the fight as Drake's recollection ends]
So it was Josh who started the fight.
That is so not how it happened.
Oh, that poor little girl.
There's no poor little girl! Why would a dying British orphan be at a Padres game?!
I ain't callin' you a truther.
[Drake and Josh angrily head to their room]
Just thought you might what to see something.
No! Alright, there is nothing that you can show me right now that would ever make me forgive you- [gasps as Drake shows him his foam finger]
The last foam finger from that padres game years ago.
You kept it all these years?
Sure did...'cause I love It! You see, I forgot how much I love it, but since you reminded me, I'm ready to start, loving it again.
That finger should belong to me.
Yeah? Well, you can't have it, you know why?
Because I'm #1! [Josh attempts to takes it from Drake and misses, he angrily roars and fights Drake, then rips the finger off the foam finger, making it a foam fist, Drake grows angry with Josh] You crossed the line.
You crossed the line 8 years ago!
No! [Drake starts taking his things in anger] What are you doing?
Wait, what are you- Where are you going?!
I'M MOVING OUT! [angrily leaves the room and takes his stuff with him, but he comes back to take his foam finger away from Josh]
Now how much longer are you two gonna fight over a dumb foam finger?
Until he admits he started the fight.
You thumped me in the back of my 8 year-old head.
Okay. Well, then would you please tell everyone, that he is the one that thumped me on the back of my head, and that's what started the fight?
No, you can tell everyone here that he just attacked me for no reason!
Could you tell us what happened?!
[Flashback #3: in Lenny's real recollection]
[narrating] The Padres were playing against the Giants, and I was selling foam fingers, it was late in the afternoon, these 2 boys get in line at the concession stand...
Okay, Drake, here's some money, you get yourself a souvenir.
[smiling] Megan! Are you hungry?
Yes. You can have a cookie.
TMToddler Megan
I am hungry.
[walks up to Young Drake] Hey.
I'm gonna buy a foam finger.
[Two little girls walk up behind the boys]
LGLittle Girl
Hi, is it okay if we cut in front of you?
You know, my dad's a weatherman.
[Young Josh looks surprised]
LGLittle Girl
Thanks. Bye. [she and the other little girl leave]
Okay, it looks like you got the last one.
[upset] Aw, that's the last foam finger?
Daddy! [Toddler Megan throws the cookie at Young Josh's head in slow motion] Aaah! [angrily turns to Young Drake] You thumped me!
[truthfully] No, I didn't.
[Young Josh tackles Young Drake for the last foam finger, and they began to fight]
[They continue fighting until the cops show up as Lenny's recollection ends, back to present day]
[realizing] So...it was Megan who started the fight.
That's right. She threw the cookie.
[surprised] Wow. I was even cool then!
[Drake and Josh reconcile from their fight]
Can you believe us? I mean, we've been fighting this whole week. We were fighting when we were 8 years old.
Yeah, I wonder what it's gonna be like when we're 80.
[Flashforwarding 80 years, Drake and Josh imagine themselves and Megan as seniors, all old and cranky]
EJElderly Josh
I am starving. [blows on his inhaler; an elderly Megan comes to bring them their bowls of food] Starving!
EDElderly Drake
Yeah, where's Megan with our dinna?
EMElderly Megan
I'm comin', I'm comin'! Drake, here's your oatmeal. Josh, here's your cream of wheat. [gives them their bowls] Boobs! [walks away]
EJElderly Josh
Wait. Wait-wait, I wanted the oatmeal.
EDElderly Drake
No, you asked for the cream of wheat.
EJElderly Josh
You gimme that oatmeal!
EDElderly Drake
Over my dead body!
EJElderly Josh
Fine! I can wait 5 minutes.
EDElderly Drake
That's it! I'm eatin' on the other side of the room. [gets up]
EJElderly Josh
Well, who needs ya? [gets up cracking his back, as Megan secretly throws a cookie at him and quickly escapes] You threw somethin' at me!
EDElderly Drake
That's a lie!
EDElderly Drake
Oh, it's on!
EJElderly Josh
It's go time!
EDElderly Drake
I'll show you go time!
EJElderly Josh
I am comin' at you, fast as lighting!
[Both fight until they fall asleep on the couch as the episode ends]
[During the end credits, Josh wakes up from his dream]
Drake? Drake, you awake? [picks up his Oprah cardboard] Oh, Oprah. Oh, Commander Nichols. [kisses his Oprah cardboard as Drake wakes up from his dream too] It could happen.
You know what I love about you?
What do you love about me?
You're always in a great mood. Man, I can't believe I even thought about dumping you.
Oh, oh, nothing, it's stupid.
Well, it's just you know. Okay, to be totally honest, you know I-I got kind of freaked out about the other night.
What, the thing with the football player?
Yeah, you know I was thinking how could I date a girl who's tougher than me? But Josh told me I was just being dumb.
Yeah. So now you're cool with it?
Dating a girl that's tougher than you.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, okay you are not tougher than me, that football player just caught me off guard.
[laughing] Okay, whatever you say.
You think you're tougher than me.
[Drake and Lucy both get together in an arm wrestling contest]
