A character in Dinosaurs
Played by Stuart Pankin
Dinosaurs · 66 quotes
Most-quoted character in Dinosaurs: in 41 of its 66 quotes
Most scenes with: Robbie Sinclair (12), B.P. Richfield (9), Fran Sinclair (8)
Elder [reading from the Sacred Book of Dinosaur]: ...and his father [Earl] shall be courageous and wise.
[Earl chuckles]
Elder [to another Elder]: Give me the Wite-Out.
[Elder edits the sacred book]
Elder [reading from the (revised) Sacred Book of Dinosaur]: ...father shall be a blithering idiot.
EarlCan he do that?
EarlIf your mother can take the time kill this dinner, you can take the time to eat it.
EarlI shoulda shown [Robbie] the beauty of killing small things.
[Earl is telling Robbie about his father.]
EarlHe expected me to live in the woods, have kids in the mud, eat my mate and die in pieces. And you know? That was okay for him. But I wanted better.
Earl[talking about Ethyl] It was one of the most pleasant conversations we've ever had. She wasn't rude. She wasn't obnoxious. She didn't hit me...[jumps out of his chair in alarm] Oh my God, she's dead!
EarlHoney, I'm home.
[Earl walks into the living room and sees Robbie and Charlene watching TV while the baby is alone in the kitchen.]
EarlMorning, kids. What are you doing?
Watching the baby.
EarlNice to see you you're accepting more responsibility.
[Robbie is refusing to help manage the people coming to see the new king (Baby)]
Those dinosaurs out there are just sheep.
EarlHave you noticed that some of those sheep are cheerleaders?
[Robbie runs outside to help.]
A meteor watch has been put into effect throughout the Pangean panhandle. Scientists have specifically pinpointed this particular house as the point of probable impact.
[A picture of the Sinclair house appears on the tv screen]
EarlCome on, come on! What does this have to do with me?
[Earl is talking to the insurance agent about the cost of replacing the tv]
EarlDon't try to cheat me on this! 'Cause I know you insurance guys, you have absolutely no ethics.
Well, how much would you say your television is worth?
EarlTen thousand dollars. Good thing I popped for that extra meteor coverage, huh?
For us, yes. But if you refer to that large bound volume we sent you labeled "exclusions", you'll find that a meteor is only a meteor until it enters the Earth's atmosphere, at which time it become a meteorite.
EarlAs you can see, I have separated all known dinosaur wisdom into three categories: "Animal, vegetable, rocks."
Well, what about fire?
EarlVegetable.
What about water?
EarlWater is the opposite of fire, which we have previously established as a vegetable. What's the opposite of a vegetable? Fruit. So water is a fruit. Fruit is not a vegetable, so it has to be either an animal or a rock. We know it's not an animal. Therefore, fruit is a rock.
Daddy, I asked you about water.
EarlCould we hold all questions until the end of the lecture, please?
EarlAnd what makes you the Ancient History expert?
I was there.
[Robbie leaves the table, refusing to eat meat]
EarlCharlene, you are now my son.
Thanks Daddy. Can I have money for lipstick?
EarlOf course, son.
EarlIt doesn't take a genius to figure that out.
Then you're the guy for the job.
Earl [to Fran]: It's not [Charlene's] tail. Cause that would be a female problem, and she isn't a female yet, so she doesn't have a problem. Which if she did, we wouldn't discuss it in front of the son!
Fine, I'll leave.
EarlI'll go with you.
Fran SinclairJessica Walter · 12 quotes
B.P. RichfieldSherman Hemsley · 10 quotes
Baby SinclairKevin Clash · 9 quotes
Ethyl Hinkleman PhillipsFlorence Stanley · 9 quotes
Charlene SinclairSally Struthers · 8 quotes
HHHoward Handupme4 quotes
MonicaSuzie Plakson · 4 quotes
Mr. Mason DixonSteve Whitmire · 3 quotes
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Dinosaurs pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.