Howard Handupme quotes from Dinosaurs

And taking a look at the long-range forecast: continued snow, darkness, and extreme cold. This is Howard Handupme. Good night. [pause] Goodbye.

A meteor watch has been put into effect throughout the Pangean panhandle. Scientists have specifically pinpointed this particular house as the point of probable impact.

Earl

Come on, come on! What does this have to do with me?

Good morning. Last night's massive aerial springs have succeeded in destroying all of the cider poppies. Unfortunately, it also killed all other forms of plant life on the planet.

[sadly] Well, there goes breakfast.

...and so it seems the task force solution to the cider poppy problem, has caused an environmental calamity of catastrophic proportions.

Baby

Somebody's in trouble.

Earl

[happily] Good morning, everyone! Isn't it a beautiful day?

Fran

[angrily] Earl, have you looked outside? That spray of yours killed every plant on Earth!

Earl

D'oh, pish-posh, Franny! Given the operation of this magnitude just bound to be some unfortunate casualties, but let's not giving the wild hunt purply. [Earl sees the valley with dead plants; Earl gasps in shocked] Duh... maybe we went a little overboard with the poison.

Charlene

[shocked in anger] A little? [furious] Your stupid spray killed all plant life!

Earl

Hey, what are you complaining about? You never liked salads anyway!

Charlene

[shocked in anger] Huh?

[angrily] You've destroyed the global food chain! No plants means no food at all!

Earl

Nonsense! There's a wide variety of commercial snack foods which have virtually no natural ingredients.

Fran

[furious] Earl, we can't live on Ho-Ho's!

Baby

I can!

Earl

[reassuringly] Hey, let's not get panicky. Our Task Force Technical Advisor will know exactly how to bring back the plants.

B.P. Richfield

How the heck should I know?! I'm a captain of industry, not a gardener!!!

You're tuned to DNN's Pre-Prime News. And now here's senior correspondent, Howard Handupme.

And finally, follow-up from last week's Georgie Show mainly has sparked a Justice Department Investigation into the Georgie Empire, leading to the arrest of Georgie himself on charges of racketeering and tax evasion. In a related story, Earl Sinclair was pardoned of all criminal charges by the Chief Elder who was also apparent. He presented Sinclair a key to the city and thanked him for in his words: "giving that chuckling carpet bag a well-deserved shot in the chops.".

Earl

Yeah, a lot of goodness does me. There's no door in this city.