Catherine Willows quotes from CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

Catherine

[to Nick] Remember, if you get stuck just maintain the same posture. If there's any adjustments, you're seen as squirming. It's going to make you look shifty.

Nick

Thanks, Cath. You know, I've done this before.

Catherine

Well, I've done it longer.

Nick

Damn!

Catherine

What?

Nick

Damn, damn, damn. I forgot to put case identifiers on my dice photos.

Catherine

Date, time and file number?

Nick

Yeah. [Catherine doesn't say anything] Don't look at me that way, okay? I wrote it down on the evidence envelope. I had to move fast. The casino manager wanted us out of there.

Catherine

The dice places Tom at the murder. Victim's blood mixed with his saliva.

Nick

I was sweating bullets looking at those photos.

Catherine

Did the judge exclude the dice?

Nick

No. No, just my credibility.

Catherine

Grissom... they're beating our heads in. Judge is going to dismiss... you can feel it.

Grissom

Don't get ahead of yourself.

Catherine

I'm not ahead of myself. I'm up there front and center taking hits along with the rest of CSI. You know, you've turned into a really lousy leader. I need your help, and you're on the sidelines.

Warrick

Cath? You all right? Don't let him get to you like that.

Catherine

I was scared...and I still am. [Warrick puts his arms around Catherine] Don't tell anyone, okay?

Warrick

You know I could do this for you.

Catherine

Not going to hurt any less. (Catherine takes a swab from the cut on her head)

Warrick

Two guys break and enter and get into some kind of an altercation.

Catherine

One ends up killing the other.

David

And almost Catherine. That had to be scary, huh?

Catherine

I didn't have time to be scared, David

Greg

Hey, I hear you're cheating on me with an out-of-state DNA analyst.

Catherine

Apples and oranges, Greg. Fifteen-year-old hair samples no roots, room-temperature storage.

Greg

Room temp?

Catherine

Yeah, that's how we stored hair evidence back then. Microscopy was king.

Greg

Really? I thought Elvis was king.

Catherine

And you are how old?

Greg

Age is irrelevant in our relationship.

Catherine

Maybe so, but face it, Greg you just don't have the equipment.

Grissom

I guess clothes do make "The Man."

Catherine

In this case, "The Man" makes the clothes... and produces the music... and represents the athletes... when he's not involved in street shootings, of course.

Grissom

And when you asked him what he was wearing the night of the murder, he couldn't remember?

Catherine

As far as he's concerned murder is just another way to separate himself from the Calvins and Ralphs of the world.

Grissom

Calvin and Ralph?

Catherine

Klein and Lauren. Fashion.

Grissom

Oh. Well, for most CSIs, fashion is irrelevant.

Catherine

Speak for yourself. The only thing between me and a wardrobe like this is a few extra zeros on my paycheck.

I've processed hundreds of bogus snuff films. But this, this one just felt different.

Catherine

Yeah, it should. arterial spray was real.

Grissom

It's not fake blood. It's human. That was a murder... on 16 millimeter.

Catherine

You killed her.

Sara

I guess she killed you back.

Catherine

Hey, Greggy, any luck on those blood and hair samples?

Greg

Don't insult me. Luck is for those without skill.

Catherine

Spoken like a man who's never hit the jackpot.

Greg

Sad, but true.

Grissom

We're gonna have to dismantle this piece by piece.

Catherine

Yeah.

Grissom

I'll get a foreman.

Catherine

I think I can handle this.

Grissom

You know about meat grinders?

Catherine

Well, everything's pretty much plumbing. Male into female parts. Righty tighty, lefty loosey.

Sara

She's a virgin?! So what are we talking here immaculate conception?

Catherine

More like the immaculate perception. Pseudocyesis: imagined pregnancy.

Sara

It's all in her head? Well, that would explain what she was doing in Dad's bed.

Catherine

Fantasizing.

Catherine

That's not all they're missing.

Grissom

You know, ravens, like eagles, have been known to travel 30 miles from roost to feeding ground.

Catherine

30 miles in every direction. Pi-r-squared. That means that we're looking at a ... 2,800 mile search area.

Grissom

"Once upon a midnight dreary while I pondered weak and weary over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore."

Catherine

We're up a tree and you're quoting Poe. Give me something.