Chowder · Season 1
Hi, are you a mirror?
[rubbing his nose] No. I'm a foreign exchange apprentice. My name is Porridge, and I'm living with Kimchi's family for the summer. Huh. Who are you supposed to be?
I'm supposed to be Chowder, Kimchi's best friend.
Ha! No, who are you really?
Ch-Chowder, Kimchi's best friend.
Well, I guess if you say so. Dinner has already begun.
[Chowder, Porridge, Kimchi and his family eat dinner around the table]
Yes, Kimchi's mom. Yes, I do think Kimchi's...new bride is...beautiful. Just can it, Kimchi. She's got a bag over her head. I bet she's all warty, or has an extra eye.
Actually, Chowder, the rich and ancient culture of Kimchi's people FORBIDS the groom from seeing his bride's face before the wedding.
Wow! So is she burned with acid?
Yes, that is also tradition.
How do you know all this junk about Kimchi's culture? Kimchi never talks about any of this stuff.
That's because Kimchi's ashamed of his culture. Why else would he leave his home and his two loving parents, and always go live with an outsider with weird hat, like YOU?
Is this true, Kimchi? Is my hat weird?
If you were really Kimchi's friend, you would know better than to be friends with him.
But Kimchi always said in his culture, if someone saves your life, you have to be their friend until you can return the favor and save theirs!
[gasps] Are you saying you saved Kimchi's life?
No, for reals.
[pulls Chowder away from Marmalade] Oh, there you are Chowder. What's going on here? For a second there, it looked like you found a new [breaths fire from her mouth in a malicious tone] GIRLFRIEND.
Oh, you mean Marmalade. Well, she is a girl.
Guilty.
And she is my friend.
Try me and convict me.
[laughs; then firmly] Chowder, you get back over here, right this second.
But I don't wanna.
Now. Get over here, now.
But can I have more than one friend who's a girl?
No, don't test me, Chowder.
What flavor lipstick are you wearing?
Smackdown. Now get over here.
Um, I think I'd prefer to stay with starwbarbelberry.
Chowder, [through gritted teeth] do not make me...
Panini, Panini, what comes after number 29?
[crying] Oh, Chowder, how could you do this to me?!
On a scale of one to ten, how desperate would you say you are right now?
[crying] Eleven!
Wow, Shnitzel. We're in Tofu Town! It's the most Asian-themed district in Marzipan City!
Shnitzelson, I finally found you. Didn't think your mysterious past could catch up to you now, did you?
Mysterious past? Shnitzel...Ohh!
I've finally lured you back here, so that I can have vengeance for what you did to my father.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Shnitzel, what's going on? I didn't know you had a mysterious past. That's so cool!
[Shnitzel elbows Chowder, waking him up while he fell asleep through the whole flashback story]
Sorry. I fell asleep. Can you repeat that?
Now, he must pay for his failure. He must FACE THE MUSIC.
[The Sukiyaki Yuza fighters start singing the show's theme song which starts driving Shnitzel crazy and falls flat on the ground]
Hey, fish lady, I don't see what the big deal is. Why don't we just go over there and get Shabu Shabu back?
Impossible! It's too dangerous. Only a skilled meat fighter can face the awesome power of Peking Duck.
Well, what about Shnitzel? He was pretty awesome in the flashback.
[lifts up his head] Radda?
You have a point, chunky purple one. Very well. If you two rescue my father, Shnitzel's honor among the Sukiyaki Yuza will be restored.
All right!
Radda?
There it is, Shnitzel, the hideout of the Teriyaki Triads. Gyoza said Shaba Shabu's inside, trapped in his cookie prison.
[off-screen as Shnitzel walks right into his trap] Well, well, well. We meet again my pathetic old friend. I have waited a long time for this. I see you want this cookie. [reveals himself from a cloud of smoke; laughs] You will have to get through the meal I prepared for you first!
[to Shnitzel] You! [push Chowder to him] Please, take him home! His singing is horrible!
I love karaoke!
You did it. But, where's my father?
[coughs up Shabu Shabu and burps] Sorry, I just wanted the cookie. [burps again; narrating] And so, Shnitzel, the greatest meat fighter that ever lived, restored his honor, and brought peace back to all of Tofu-Town. The end.
You ate the delivery again, didn't you?
Oh, sorry.
Oh, radda! [facepalms in annoyance]
[During the end credits]
[reading note] "Do not eat. This means you, Chowder. Love Mung." Gotta stay strong, gotta stay strong, gotta stay strong.
So that's it? You're not eating me?
No, no I want to but, Mung said-
Look kid, if people listen to notes nothing would get done in this world. Notes are really more like guidelines. It said, "Do not eat." Didn't say "Do not eat pizza."
[Little later... Puppet Mung notices the pizza's gone]
You ate it, didn't you?
[from inside Puppet Chowder's stomach] No.
[looking through the scouts guide book] OH, MY GOSH! This is horrible! According to the guide, Gazpacho has a deadly case of...Rabie-C's!
Rabie-C's?
It's all here in the Scout Handbook. See? Signs of Rabie-C's - "sweating, worked up."
Yeah, but it also says you foam at the ears.
That's stage two. He's not that far yet.
There's only one thing we can do! Get some protection.
You want I should call the cops?
Not that kind of protection.
Radda Radda Radda?
No, not that kind of protection.
[During the credits]
[petting a cat] Aww. Radda radda, Yes, you radda. Yeah, you... [sees Puppet Truffles] Uh, uh...radda.
Ha, ha. You did that, I'm gonna tell everyone about this. [flies off]
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Chowder pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
