Cheers quotes
515 total quotesAll Seasons Season 1 Season 2
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Diane: [about Carla] She should be over this by now. It's been weeks. I've robbed her of her zest for life.
Sam: You do have that effect on people.
Sam: You do have that effect on people.
Diane: Bennett Ludlow is a wonderful catch.
Carla: There's some things he doesn't know about me.
Diane: Well a little mystery is good for a marriage. What haven't you told him?
Carla: Well I haven't been completely honest about my kids.
Diane: What haven't you told him about your kids?
Carla: That they live.
Carla: There's some things he doesn't know about me.
Diane: Well a little mystery is good for a marriage. What haven't you told him?
Carla: Well I haven't been completely honest about my kids.
Diane: What haven't you told him about your kids?
Carla: That they live.
Diane: Carla, I don't think you should be engaging in strenuous activity when you're with child.
Carla: If I didn't do things with child, I'd never leave the house. The only thing I ever did without child resulted in one.
Carla: If I didn't do things with child, I'd never leave the house. The only thing I ever did without child resulted in one.
Diane: I haven't had such a good time since uh....
Sam: That's okay. I know when you stopped having a good time, Diane.
Diane: It goes without saying I would have had a better time if I had gone with Frasier.
Sam: Me too.
Sam: That's okay. I know when you stopped having a good time, Diane.
Diane: It goes without saying I would have had a better time if I had gone with Frasier.
Sam: Me too.
Diane: I'm sorry, Sam. What was I saying?
Sam: You don't know either? We gotta have a rule around here-when you speak at least one of us has gotta be listening.
Sam: You don't know either? We gotta have a rule around here-when you speak at least one of us has gotta be listening.
Diane: It's nice to know you draw the line somewhere.
Sam: There are three types of women I don't get involved with: married, underaged and comatose.
Norm: [to Cliff] He's added one.
Sam: There are three types of women I don't get involved with: married, underaged and comatose.
Norm: [to Cliff] He's added one.
Diane: Nick Tortelli, this is someone with whom you have absolutely nothing in common, my paramour Dr. Frasier Crane.
Nick: Doctor of what. Can you get any pills?
Frasier: I'm a psychiatrist. Have we met? You wouldn't, by any chance, be the bogus missing link exhibited at the Amsterdam World's Fair?
Nick: No, but you're not the first person to ask me.
Nick: Doctor of what. Can you get any pills?
Frasier: I'm a psychiatrist. Have we met? You wouldn't, by any chance, be the bogus missing link exhibited at the Amsterdam World's Fair?
Nick: No, but you're not the first person to ask me.
Diane: Oh Frasier, I think I'm going to come back to work here.
Frasier: What?! No no no no no no. Listen as Frasier Crane M.D. I don't think that's a good idea for the two of you. And as Frasier Crane Man I don't think it's a good idea for the three of us.
Frasier: What?! No no no no no no. Listen as Frasier Crane M.D. I don't think that's a good idea for the two of you. And as Frasier Crane Man I don't think it's a good idea for the three of us.
Diane: Oh, Frasier, a letter from Cheers. No, wait... it's a Lillian Huxley's resume and a note: "Ha, ha! You're out of here forever!" Always nice to hear from Carla.
Diane: Oh, my God. The thing I feared most has happened.
Carla: Your Living Bra died of boredom?
Carla: Your Living Bra died of boredom?
Diane: Sam is developing an interest in the Impressionists.
Frasier: Hmm.
Diane: Hmm, what?
Frasier: Hmm, this is suspicious. I think it's part of Sam's grand design to win you back.
Diane: Oh, not this again. It's starting to sound like a broken record.
Frasier: Oh, now you're saying that I'm redundant, that I repeat myself, that I say things over and over!
Frasier: Hmm.
Diane: Hmm, what?
Frasier: Hmm, this is suspicious. I think it's part of Sam's grand design to win you back.
Diane: Oh, not this again. It's starting to sound like a broken record.
Frasier: Oh, now you're saying that I'm redundant, that I repeat myself, that I say things over and over!
Diane: You can't give her some standard pre-arranged speech you have for dumping women.
Sam: I do not have a standard pre-arranged speech for dumping women. Come on, every situation is different. For example now the speech I dumped you with will be totally inappropriate.
Diane: I don't think you dumped me.
Sam: Well you see that was the beauty of it. Come on give me credit will you, for knowing I couldn't possibly have one speech for every situation.
Cliff: Yeah, he's got six.
Sam: I do not have a standard pre-arranged speech for dumping women. Come on, every situation is different. For example now the speech I dumped you with will be totally inappropriate.
Diane: I don't think you dumped me.
Sam: Well you see that was the beauty of it. Come on give me credit will you, for knowing I couldn't possibly have one speech for every situation.
Cliff: Yeah, he's got six.
Frasier: Carla, why do you keep building walls between you and everyone else?
Carla: Have you taken a good look at everyone else [in the bar]?
Frasier: Touché.
Carla: Have you taken a good look at everyone else [in the bar]?
Frasier: Touché.
Frasier: Sam, Diane and I are going to Europe.
Sam: Europe? Overseas?
Diane: Well we were going to go to the local one but it's all booked up.
Sam: Europe? Overseas?
Diane: Well we were going to go to the local one but it's all booked up.
Hester Crane: [referring to Diane] I understand you used to date that woman.
Sam: That's right.
Hester: How much would it take to start things up again?
Sam: You don't have enough money.
Hester: How do you know?
Sam: There isn't enough money.
Sam: That's right.
Hester: How much would it take to start things up again?
Sam: You don't have enough money.
Hester: How do you know?
Sam: There isn't enough money.