Cheers quotes
515 total quotesAll Seasons
Season 1
Season 2
Season 3
Season 4
Season 5
Season 6
Season 7
Season 8
Season 9
Season 10
Season 11
Coach: What's the story, Norm?
Norm: A thirsty guy walks into a bar. You finish it.
Norm: A thirsty guy walks into a bar. You finish it.
Diane [into telephone]: Yes, I'll take a message.
[Pause, then Diane hangs up the phone]
Sam: Well?
Diane: "You're a magnificent pagan beast."
Sam: Thanks. What's the message?
[Pause, then Diane hangs up the phone]
Sam: Well?
Diane: "You're a magnificent pagan beast."
Sam: Thanks. What's the message?
Diane: [talking about how Sam was able to make the beer slide around the corner of the bar] Okay, how do you do it?
Sam: Well it's just one of my two hidden talents. The other one is just as impressive.
Diane: But you can hardly charge a buck for it.
Sam: Well it's just one of my two hidden talents. The other one is just as impressive.
Diane: But you can hardly charge a buck for it.
Diane: Coach, do you think I'm a smart person?
Coach: You're the smartest person I ever met.
Diane: Well, I, Diane Chambers, bred and educated to walk with kings, once offered a full scholarship to the Sorbonne, have allowed myself to become attracted to a six foot three inch bubble gum card.
Coach: Well gee, I think I can help you out with the sore buns Diane, but...the rest of what you say is all over my head!
Coach: You're the smartest person I ever met.
Diane: Well, I, Diane Chambers, bred and educated to walk with kings, once offered a full scholarship to the Sorbonne, have allowed myself to become attracted to a six foot three inch bubble gum card.
Coach: Well gee, I think I can help you out with the sore buns Diane, but...the rest of what you say is all over my head!
Diane: Hi doctor.
Dr. Graham: Hi Diane. How are you?
Diane: In what sense?
Dr. Graham: Pardon me?
Diane: Oh you mean how are you, right. Not you know how are you. Well if that's what you meant, I'm fine.
Dr. Graham: Hi Diane. How are you?
Diane: In what sense?
Dr. Graham: Pardon me?
Diane: Oh you mean how are you, right. Not you know how are you. Well if that's what you meant, I'm fine.
Diane: I sold out womankind for a trip to Bermuda.
Sam: Come on, don't feel so bad. Most people would have done it for the dry cleaning.
Sam: Come on, don't feel so bad. Most people would have done it for the dry cleaning.
Diane: I'm sorry I was late, Sam. Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?
Sam: Yeah, yeah but you wouldn't.
Sam: Yeah, yeah but you wouldn't.
Diane: Name calling, the last refuge of the monosyllabic.
Carla: I don't know what that means but I heard slob in there.
Carla: I don't know what that means but I heard slob in there.
Diane: Rebecca, is there something wrong?
Rebecca Prout: [sobbing] Oh Diane, you could always see beyond my facade of gaiety!
Rebecca Prout: [sobbing] Oh Diane, you could always see beyond my facade of gaiety!
Diane: Sam, let's talk.
Sam: There's nothing to talk about.
Diane: It's important. Come back to the office now.
Carla: Uh oh. Sammy's in trouble with Miss Chambers again.
Everyone in the bar: [chanting] Sam's in trouble with Miss Chambers, Sam's in trouble with Miss Chambers....
Sam: There's nothing to talk about.
Diane: It's important. Come back to the office now.
Carla: Uh oh. Sammy's in trouble with Miss Chambers again.
Everyone in the bar: [chanting] Sam's in trouble with Miss Chambers, Sam's in trouble with Miss Chambers....
Diane: What could happen?
Sam: Oh nothing, oh nothing. Two women left alone who hate each other in a room filled with glass and alcohol.
Sam: Oh nothing, oh nothing. Two women left alone who hate each other in a room filled with glass and alcohol.
Diane: You know, Sam. If I am to serve both as a waitress and the butt of jokes I think I should make more money.
Carla: Yeah, what does a good butt make in this town?
...
Sam: [to Diane] We all know that you'd starve to death before you made a living with your body.
Carla: Yeah, what does a good butt make in this town?
...
Sam: [to Diane] We all know that you'd starve to death before you made a living with your body.
Diane: You're offended because she thought you were a scum bag?
Sam: No. I actually like that.
Sam: No. I actually like that.