PhoebeHey, you okay?
Yeah, sure, why not? We could have another funeral tomorrow. I mean, all the dishes are out, and we pretty much know who to invite.
Phoebe
Piper...
Just tell me one thing. Are you insane or are you just plain stupid? We bury Prue this morning and you go off tonight and nearly join her. What the hell is the matter with you?!
Phoebe
I was trying to save the innocent.
No. You were trying to get yourself killed, which is what this family does best is get killed. Isn't it obvious by now that our only destiny is to die? And you are making it way too easy for them, Phoebe. You are just walking right into it!
Phoebe
I am so sorry.
I can not handle anything right now and I certainly cannot handle losing another sister.
(finding out that there is a possibility that the Charmed Ones can be reconstituted following Prue's death, Piper furiously marches up to the attic)
Phoebe
What's going on?
I'm going to ask Grams what's going on, actually.
Phoebe
Grams?
Mm-hmm! Your destiny still awaits, she says. There's a reason for everything, she says. So now it's time to summon her transparent butt back here and find out exactly what that reason is!
Phoebe
Okay, but what would...
(tensely reciting the spell, interrupting Phoebe loudly) Hear these words, hear my cry, spirit from the other side. Come to me, I summon thee, (angrily) cross now the Great DIVIDE!
Piper, why are you calling? Phoebe? What's going on?
Alright, fine, You've caught us, congratulations! So what are you going to do about us, shoot us?
Phoebe
Easy, Grams! Not all of us are dead, remember?
It's kind of hard to heal myself when I'm knocked out.
Phoebe
Leo, how is possible for an angel to even get knocked out? I mean, you are, after all, technically dead.
Three years together, and now you're asking these questions?
Phoebe
Well…
I think the more appropriate question is, how does a whitelighter get somebody knocked UP? (Phoebe lets out a giggle)
What's that supposed to mean?
What do you think it means?
If it's about Paige, I swear, the Elders had no idea that she even existed, or that she was your sister.
Phoebe
Sister witch.
Half-witch, half-whitelighter. Let's not forget that little surprise. (She helps Leo with the ice pack). I still can't believe that Mom kept that secret from us.
Phoebe
Well, it sounded like she didn't have much of a choice.
We're her daughters. She could've found a way to share that information with us. (The doorbell rings) That better not be another long-lost relative.
Phoebe
Why did you come to Prue's funeral? I mean, you never even met her right?
No, I never did. I don't want this to be taken the wrong way, but, I just feel like part of me lost her too. I just.. I felt drawn to her, to all you guys. I guess it was just part of me trying to find out who I was.
Okay, turn left up here. And can you step on the gas a little?
(makes a sharp turn and almost collides with a taxi cab.)
Phoebe
Off the gas! Off the gas!
Does somebody else want to drive here?
She has no regard for her life, or anyone else's. She's Charles Bronson cubed.
Phoebe
Guys, guys. Who is Charles Bronson?
(Leo and Cole look at each other incredulously)
Phoebe
Never mind.
Evil got the Book of Shadows. How did evil get the Book of Shadows?
Phoebe
Oh no.
Oh no, Phoebe? Evil got the Book of Shadows, 'oh no' doesn't quite cover it.
Let me go see what I can find out... (stopped by Phoebe)
Phoebe
No, wait... Uh, Piper? Promise me you're not gonna over-react.
Phoebe
I think that, uh, maybe... (gulps) well, it might-might be feasible that, uh, (takes in a deep breath) Paige... borrowed the book.
What? Why-why... why... Why would you think that?!
Phoebe
See, now, this is what I meant by over-reacting, it's just that I...
You let Paige take the Book of Shadows out of the manor.
Phoebe
Well, no, I did not let her! It's just she left pretty quick and... it looks like she might've... (points to the open attic window)
Phoebe
Piper, I...
Phoebe, why would you even leave her alone with it?!
Phoebe
Well, because she's our sister.
(chuckles, then stops abruptly) Not for long! (stalks out)
(Phoebe follows Piper out of the door, only to return again to Cole, who is sitting on a chair)
Phoebe
Aren't you coming?
To vanquish your sister? (scoffs lightly) I think I'll sit this one out.
(Phoebe leaves while Cole twiddles his thumbs.)
I don't know, they just... grew.
(as Phoebe scoffs) Oh, right, and-and you had nothing to do with that.
Phoebe
Did you cast any spells?
One... (reluctantly after a pause) Five...
Phoebe
Okay, what did you do just before you turned into Betty Boop?
Charmed · 1,127 quotes
