Phoebe Halliwell quotes from Charmed

Piper

First, I'd like to tell you how relieved I am you're okay.

Phoebe

Me too.

Piper

And secondly, I'd like to tell you that you have completely lost your mind.

Phoebe

Completely lost your mind!

Piper

What would I do without you?

Phoebe

Oh suffer endlessly, no doubt.

Phoebe

Hello, privacy!

Prue

Hello, ax-murderer!

Phoebe

Hey, hi, I'm Phoebe.

I'm Charlene. Actually we've met. We even carpooled. Metaphysics 301, remember?

Phoebe

Oh, that's right and your dad is the professor of that class, right?

Yeah, dirty rat, he gave me a C. We don't get along in anything. Even metaphysics. But I'm hoping that'll change when I finish my thesis, get published, he'll finally have to take me seriously. I'll quit before I start telling you about my mother.

Phoebe

No, it's okay. I've been studying here for so long it's nice to have someone to talk to. So what's your thesis about?

It's about the existence of demons in our world.

Phoebe

Demons?

Piper

Still Phoebe, you have to take care of yourself. You have to get some rest.

Phoebe

After. Piper, I did not go back to college to fail at it, okay. So what do I have to do? Okay, I'm gonna go change and then I'm gonna go to the library. Now, if any demon or warlock attacks, please just fend them off till Saturday. (to Leo) I have a question for you. Is it possible for someone to find proof that demons really do exist?

Leo

Mmm, I don't know, maybe. But even if anybody did, nobody would ever know about it anyway.

Phoebe

What do you mean?

Leo

Well, evil doesn't want anybody to know. It has a system for covering its tracks, protecting its identity. That's why demons disappear when you guys vanquish them.

Piper

Why do you ask?

Phoebe

Just curious. Okay, adios.

Prue

Anybody here?

Phoebe

In here.

Prue

Hey. Oh, good, I was looking for that. Wait, what are you doing with the book?

Phoebe

Oh, I'm looking for the demon that's gonna kill me. I just love getting those premonitions.

Prue

Oh, okay, what premonition? When?

Phoebe

About an hour ago. Right after I was trying to tell Charlene that she's dead.

Prue

I'm lost.

Phoebe

Oh sorry! Wrong sister.

Piper

I'm home!

Prue

Come on.

Piper

Where are we going?

Phoebe

We'll explain on the way there.

Piper

Who's that?

Phoebe

Let's go, let's go. That's my dead friend.

Leo

Ever done it on a cloud?

Phoebe

Does a featherbed count?

Piper

(about Leo) You really think he's here that much?

Phoebe

He's like the big brother I never wanted... uh... I mean, had.

Piper

Dan is back in town.

Leo

So? What am i supposed to go. Just hide out till he decides to leave again?

Piper

So, what am I going to tell him? The last time I saw him he handed me proof that you were killed in 1942. He's going to expect a reaction from me.

Phoebe

How about, 'Hey Dan, you're right, I am a necrophiliac. '.

Piper

Where you off to?

Prue

Lunch date with Dick.

Phoebe

Dull Dick? Prue, you are too hot to have to duty date.

Prue

Yeh, well. all demon hunting and no play has made me a lot less picky. I gotta figure out a way to put more balance in my life.

Piper

Yeh, but you don't need Dick!

Phoebe

You know, we keep saying that, but what does it really mean?

Prue

Okay any mass vanquishing spells?

Phoebe

You're the one who's been studying the book.

Prue

Why are you picking on me?

Phoebe

Because I'm scared and we're outnumbered.

Piper

So, why did you do that to your hair?

Phoebe

To change my luck.

Prue

Yeah, well, rules are meant to be broken.

Phoebe

Yeah, but bodies weren't.

Piper

And neither were hearts.