Oh, I'm so glad to see you!
BBob
That's nice, John.
I was talking to the cigarettes.
S6D.N.R.
BBob
Becker, I just had a great idea!
The first one's always exciting, isn't it?
BBob
I was doing some research on the internet...
Must have come as a surprise that it's not all porn, huh?
BBob
One shock at a time.
[about a patient]
What does he want?
To bask in the sunny warmth of your disposition.
Did you ever hear me say that?
No, but it certainly sounds like you!
[about relaxation tapes]
You'd be surprised how many people give 'em to me for Christmas.
I'm surprised people give you presents at all.
[to Liz]
All right, I'm sorry.
[Reggie gasps]
Oh, shut up.
I have to leave early today.
And leave me alone with Linda?
OK Here's the thing...
Aw come on Linda, no THINGS!
RRRegina 'Reggie' Kostas
I don't have a license to sell alcohol.
You don't have a license to sell rat hair, either, but that never stopped you.
RRRegina 'Reggie' Kostas
Do you think it would be silly for me to go back to college, now?
No, I think it would silly for us to have this conversation again, ten years from now.
[to Dr. John Becker] There's not a day that goes by that doesn't prove you are emotionally retarded!
[a patient can't open the door]
Door's unlocked right?
Yup.
And he still can't get in?
Apparently.
Dr. John Becker: I guess I can be a little more tolerant.
Oh, come on, you can't possibly be that stupid! If you keep pulling and it isn't working there is only one possible option, press the button and push!
[opens the door and looks to Dr. John Becker]
Jackass!
Feels good, doesn't it?
[Reggie's diner has been robbed]
Well, maybe this is a good sign. I mean, who would want to rob this place? Maybe they've finally run out of places to rob, and crime will finally stop in New York. I mean, what could they possibly rob next?
[pause]
Oh, dear God, my apartment!
Wait a minute, this guy's really good-looking, isn't he?
RRRegina 'Reggie' Kostas
I could lick his face like a Dove bar.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Becker pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.